CHAPTER TWENTY TWO.

RALPH DESCRIBETH A RARE CHARACTER, A NOBLE AND A GOOD MAN--HE GOETH TO

FISH WITHOUT A ROD, AND SUFFERETH MORE THAN FIFTY RODS COULD INFLICT,

AND IS NOT RECONCILED TO THE HONOUR OF THE SUN RIDING HIM A PICK-A-BACK.

It is now my duty, as well as my greatest pleasure, to put on record the

true kindness, the considerate generosity, and the well-directed

munificence of a family, a parallel to which can only be found in our

soil--a superior nowhere. By the heads of this family I was honoured

with particular notice. Perhaps they never gave a thought about my

poetical talent, or the wonderful progress that my master said that I

had made in my classics, and my wooden-legged tutor in my mathematics.

Their kind patronage sprang from higher motives,--from benevolence; they

had heard that I had been forsaken--their own hearts told them that the

sunshine of kindness must be doubly grateful to the neglected, and,

indeed, to me they were very kind.

Perhaps it may be thought that I had a quick eye to the failings and the

ridiculous points of those with whom chance threw me in contact. I am

sure that I was equally susceptible to the elevation of character that

was offered to me in the person of Mr ---, the respected father of the

family of which I have just made mention. As the noble class to which

he belonged, and of which he was the first ornament, are fast

degenerating, I will endeavour to make a feeble portrait of a man, that,

at present, finds but too few imitators, and that could never have found

a superior. He was one of those few merchant princes, who are really,

in all things, princely. Whilst his comprehensive mind directed the

commerce of half a navy, and sustained in competence and happiness

hundreds at home, and thousands abroad, the circle immediately around

him felt all the fostering influence of his well-directed liberality, as

if all the energies of his powerful genius had been concentrated in the

object of making those, only about him, prosperous. He was born for the

good of the many, as much as for the elevation of the individual.

Society had need of him, and it confessed it. When its interests were

invaded by a short-sighted policy, it called upon his name to advocate

its violated rights, and splendidly did he obey the call. He understood

England's power and greatness, for he had assisted in increasing it; he

knew in what consisted her strength, and in that strength he was strong,

and in his own.

As a senator, he was heard in the assembled councils of his nation, and

those who presided over her mighty resources and influenced her

destinies, that involved those of the world, listened to his warning

counsel, were convinced that his words were the dictates of wisdom, and

obeyed. This is neither fiction nor fulsome panegyric. The facts that

I narrate have become part of our history; and I would narrate them more

explicitly, did I not fear to wound the susceptibilities of his still

existing and distinguished family. How well he knew his own station,

and preserved, with the blandest manners, the true dignity of it!

Though renowned in parliament for his eloquence, at the palace for his

patriotic loyalty, and in the city for his immense wealth, in the

blessed circle, that he truly made social, there was a pleasing

simplicity and joyousness of manner, that told at once the fascinated

guest, that though he might earn honours and distinction abroad, it was

at home that he looked for happiness--and, uncommon as such things are

in this repining world--there, I verily believe, he found it. His was a

happy lot: he possessed a lady in his wife, who at once shared his

virtues and adorned them. The glory he won was reflected sweetly upon

her, and she wore with dignity, and enhanced those honours, that his

probity, his talents, and his eloquence had acquired. At the time of

which I am speaking, he was blessed with daughters, that even in their

childhood had made themselves conspicuous by their accomplishments,

amiability of disposition, and gracefulness of manners, and plagued with

sons who were full of wildness, waggishness, and worth.

It is too seldom the case that the person accords with the high

qualification of the mind. Mr --- was a singular and felicitous

exception to this mortifying rule. His deportment was truly dignified,

his frame well-knit and robust, and his features were almost classically

regular. His complexion was florid, and the expression of his

countenance serene, yet highly intelligent. No doubt but that his

features were capable of a vast range of expression; but, as I never saw

them otherwise than beaming with benevolence, or sparkling with wit, I

must refer to Master James, or Master Frank, for the description of the

austerity of his frown, or the awfulness of his rebuke.

This gentleman's two elder sons, at the time to which I allude, had

already made their first step in the world. James was making a tour of

the West Indies, the Continent being closed against him; and Frank had

already begun his harvest of laurels in the navy under a distinguished

officer. The younger sons, my juniors, were my school-fellows. Master

Frank was two or three years my senior, and before he went to sea, not

going to the same school as myself, we got together only during the

vacations; when, notwithstanding my prowess, he would fag me desperately

at cricket, outswim me on the lake and out-cap me at making Latin

verses. However, I consoled myself by saying, "As I grow older all this

superiority will cease." But when he returned, after his first cruise,

glittering in his graceful uniform, my hopes and my ambition sank below

zero. He was already a man, and an officer--I a schoolboy, and nothing

else.

Of course, he had me home to spend the day with him--and a day we had of

it. It was in the middle of summer, and grapes were ripe only in such

well-regulated hothouses as were Mr ---'s. We did not enact the

well-known fable as it is written--the grapes were not _too_ sour--nor

did we repeat the fox's ill-natured and sarcastic observation, "That

they were only fit for blackguards." We found them very good for

gentlemen--though, I fear, Mr ---'s dessert some time after owed more

to Pomona than to Bacchus for its embellishments. And the fine

mulberry-tree on the lawn--we were told that it must be shaken, and we

shook it: if it still exist, I'll answer for it, it has never been so

shaken since.

The next day we went fishing. Though our bodies were not yet fully

grown, we were persons of enlarged ideas; and to suppose that we, two

mercurial spirits, could sit like a couple of noodles, each with a long

stick in our hands, waiting for the fish to pay us a visit, was the

height of absurdity. No, we were rather too polite for that; and as it

was we, and not the gentlemen of the finny tribe that sought

acquaintance, we felt it our duty as gentlemen to visit them. We

carried our politeness still further, and showed our good breeding in

endeavouring to accommodate ourselves to the tastes and habits of those

we were about to visit. "Do at Rome as the Romans do," is the essence

of all politeness. As our friends were accustomed to be _in

naturalibus--vulgice_, stark naked, we adopted their Adamite fashion,

and, undressing, in we plunged. Our success was greater with the finny,

than was that of any exquisite with the fair tribe. We captivated and

captured pailfuls. We drove our entertainers into the narrow creeks in

shoals, and then with a net extended between us, we had the happiness of

introducing them into the upper air. The sport was so good, that we

were induced to continue it for some hours; but whilst we were preparing

for a multitudinous fry, the sun was actually all the while enjoying a

most extensive broil. Our backs, and mine especially, became one

continuous blister. Whilst in the water, and in the pursuit, I did not

regard it--indeed, we were able to carry home the trophies of our

success--and then--I hastened to bed. My back was fairly peeled and

repeeled. I performed involuntarily Mr Saint John's curative process

to a miracle. No wonder that I've been ever since free from all, even

the slightest symptoms of pulmonary indisposition. However, my

excruciating torments gained me two things--experience, and a new skin.

When I had fresh skinned myself--and it took me more than a week to do

it--I found that my fellow-labourer had flown. I heard that he had

suffered almost as severely as myself, but, as he looked upon himself as

no vulgar hero, he was too manly to complain, and next Sunday he

actually went to church, whilst I lay in bed smarting with pain--yet I

strongly suspect that a new sword, that he had that day to hang by his

side, made him regardless to the misery of his back.

That Sunday fortnight I dined with Mr ---, and, of course, he did me

the honour to converse upon our fishing exploit, and its painful

consequences.

"So, Master Rattlin," said the worthy gentleman, "you think that you and

Frank proved yourselves excellent sportsmen?"

"Yes, sir," said I; "I will answer for the sports, if you will only be

pleased to answer for the men."

"Well said, my little man!" said Mrs --- to me, smiling kindly.

"You see, sir, with all submission, I've gained the verdict of the lady;

and that's a great deal."

"But I think you lost your hide. Was your back very sore?" said my

host, encouragingly.

"O dear--very sore indeed, sir! Mrs Cherfeuil said that it looked

quite like a newly-cut steak."

"O it did, did it? but Frank's was not much better," said the senator,

turning to his lady.

"Indeed it was not," said she, compassionately.

"Very well," said Mr ---, very quietly, "I'll tell you this, Master

Rattlin, sportsmen as you think yourselves, you and Frank, after all,

whatever you both were when you went into the lake, you turned out two

_Johnny Raws_."

"Why, Master Rattlin," said the lady, "Mr --- uses you worse than the

sun--that did but scorch--but he roasts you."

"No wonder, madam, as he considers me _raw_," replied I.

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