Baby's Got a Tooth

The telephone rang in my office to-day,

as it often has tinkled before.

I turned in my chair in a half-grouchy way,

for a telephone call is a bore;

And I thought, "It is somebody wanting to know

the distance from here to Pekin."

In a tone that was gruff I shouted "Hello,"

a sign for the talk to begin.

"What is it?" I asked in a terrible way.

I was huffy, to tell you the truth,

Then over the wire I heard my wife say:

"The baby, my dear, has a tooth!"

I have seen a man jump when the horse that he

backed finished first in a well-driven race.

I have heard the man cheer, as a matter of fact,

and I've seen the blood rush to his face;

I've been on the spot when good news has come

in and I've witnessed expressions of glee

That range from a yell to a tilt of the chin; and

some things have happened to me

That have thrilled me with joy from my toes to

my head, but never from earliest youth

Have I jumped with delight as I did when she

said, "The baby, my dear, has a tooth."

I have answered the telephone thousands of times

for messages both good and bad;

I've received the reports of most horrible crimes,

and news that was cheerful or sad;

I've been telephoned this and been telephoned

that, a joke, or an errand to run;

I've been called to the phone for the idlest of chat,

when there was much work to be done;

But never before have I realized quite the thrill

of a message, forsooth,

Till over the wire came these words that I write,

"The baby, my dear, has a tooth."

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