_Cyclist_ (_to rural policeman_). "Nice crowd out this morning!"
_Rural Policeman_ (_who has received a tip_). "Yes, an' yer can't do
with 'em! If yer 'ollers at 'em, they honly turns round and says, 'Pip,
pip'!"
* * * * *
Illustration: _Rustic_ (_to beginner, who has charged the hedge_).
"It's no good, sir. They things won't jump!"
* * * * *
THE UNIVERSAL JUGGERNAUT.--"Anyone," says the _Daily Telegraph_, "who
has driven an automobile will know that it is quite impossible to run
over a child and remain unconscious of the fact." _Any one who has
driven an automobile!_ Heavens! what a sweeping charge! Is there none
innocent?
* * * * *
Illustration: "'Tain't no use tellin' me you've broke down! Stands to
reason a motor-caw goin' down 'ill's _bound_ to be goin' too fast. So
we'll put it down at about thirty mile an hour! Your name and address,
sir, _hif_ you please."
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