Dear Mr. Punch,--Knowing you to be a past master in the art of courtesy,
I venture to submit the following hard case to your judgment. The other
morning, being a none too experienced cyclist, I ventured into the Park
on my "wheel" at an early hour, thinking to have a little practice
unobserved. Judge of my horror when, as I was wobbling along, I was
suddenly confronted by the Duchess of Xminster and her daughters, all
expert riders! Her Grace and the Ladies Wiseacre bowed to me in the most
affable way, but, afraid to leave go of the handles of my machine, I
could only NOD in return. And I have always been renowned for the
elegance with which I remove my _chapeau_! These noble ladies have since
cut me dead. I cannot blame them, but I venture to suggest, for your
approval, that the raising of the right elbow, such as is practised by
coachmen, gentle and simple, should be adopted by all cyclists. I think
that I could manage the movement.
Yours in social despair,
AMELIUS AMBERGRIS
_Bayswater._
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Illustration: _Cow-boy_ (_to young lady who has taken refuge_). "Would
you mind openin' the gate, miss? They're a-comin' in there."
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An admirable improvement in motor-cars is about to be introduced by one
of our leading firms. Cars are frequently overturned, and the occupants
buried underneath. In future, on the bottom of every car made by the
firm in question there will be engraved the words, "Here lies----,"
followed by a blank space, which can be filled up by the purchaser.
* * * * *
_He._ "Do you belong to the Psychical Society?"
_She._ "No; but I sometimes go out on my brother's machine!"
* * * * *
Illustration: WHEEL AND WOE.--A Brooklyn inventor has patented a
cycle-hearse.
* * * * *
Illustration: UNLICENSED PEDALLERS.--Cyclists.
* * * * *