"It's a great mistake to laugh at us poor husbands; for, upon my word,
anyone else in our place would do just as we do."
I went home and to bed. I slept about three hours; then something, I
know not what, awoke me; doubtless it was written that I should wake. I
pressed the repeater of my watch: three o'clock. I thought that I would
like to know if my wife was at home; ordinarily, I did not disturb
myself about it, but she had a cold which made me anxious about her
health; if she was not more careful of herself, it might become serious;
and, although I did not love her, although she did not make me very
happy, as I was more prudent than she, it was my duty to look after her
health.
That idea prevented me from going to sleep again; it seemed to me that I
should be more at ease if I were sure that she had come home. Why should
I not go to her room to make sure? I had never done such a thing since
we had slept apart; but my solicitude ought not to offend her; and
besides, I could go there without waking her, and she would not even
know that I had been to see her. I had a duplicate key to her bedroom,
which I had had made when we slept together, so that I could go in
without rousing her; for, in the early days of our marriage, she used to
go to bed before I came home, and always locked herself in because she
was afraid. I had forgotten to give her that key, which lay in my desk;
and she had probably forgotten that I had it.
I rose and felt my way to the desk, for I kept no light in my room at
night. I found the key, and stole softly from my room to go to my wife.
I walked noiselessly through the intervening rooms, I was careful not to
make a sound; one would have thought that I was on my way to an
assignation, but it was something very different. When I reached my
wife's door I saw a light through the keyhole.--"Good!" I said to
myself; "she's at home;" and I was about to creep away, when I fancied
that I heard voices. With whom could she be talking? The servants were
always in bed when we came home, as we had our own keys. I listened; I
could not hear very distinctly; but it seemed to me that that
voice--"Parbleu!" I thought; "that would be a strange thing!" A thousand
ideas crowded into my mind. I slipped the key in the lock very softly,
turned it quickly, entered the room, and--saw Raymond in bed with my
wife!
Surprise held me motionless for an instant. Raymond jumped out of bed
and ran about the room like a madman; he could not find the door,
although there were two. I came to myself and could not resist the
temptation to give him a kick that sent him to the floor. But I soon
regretted my imprudence. To make an uproar--a scandal--to let the whole
household know that I was--I lacked only that!--I put Raymond on his
feet, pushed him out of the room, threw his coat in his face, and even
gave him a light, so that he might not break his neck on the stairs; it
was impossible to be more polite than I was.
"Until to-morrow!" I said.
I imagined that he did not hear me; but, no matter; he had gone, and I
returned to my wife.
She had remained in bed; she did not stir.
"As you may imagine," I said to her, "I do not propose to publish this
abroad; however, madame, I am not in the humor to continue to live with
you; I may be willing to conceal your misconduct, but I do not choose to
witness any more of it. Henceforth we will live apart, as divorces are
no longer granted, and as we must remain united all our lives by the
laws when we have ceased to be united by any sentiment. It is probable
that the blame will be laid on me; people will say that I have deserted
you after making you unhappy, for so they often judge the acts of
others; but it matters little to me; I leave you everything here; you
have your property, and I have mine; henceforth let there be nothing in
common between us."
Pélagie did not say a single word in reply; indeed, I am inclined to
think that she fell asleep during my speech. I took a candle, closed her
door, and returned to my own room. I intended to go to bed again; but I
felt that I should not be able to sleep. No matter if a man be not in
love or jealous, he cannot see such things as that and remain cool.
Still, I was well content with the coolness I had displayed; except for
the kick administered to Raymond, I had borne myself like a genuine
philosopher; but I felt in the bottom of my heart that one is never a
philosopher in respect to those things which concern self-esteem and
honor. Honor! Ah! Figaro is right when he asks:
"Where in the devil has honor hidden itself?"
I decided to pack up my belongings; that would keep me busy, and I
should be able to carry everything away at daybreak, and to leave
forever that woman, to whom I had been married about eighteen months,
and who had already made of me a--but one does not care to speak that
word concerning one's self, although ready enough to apply it to
others.
This, then, is the result of that happy marriage!--Ah! my dear sister,
why did I hearken to you? Why did I marry a woman who did not love me--a
woman who was not suited to me in any one respect! If we had been happy
together, if I had enjoyed being with her, if I had not left her so much
to her own resources, perhaps it would not have happened!
So that young innocent, that Agnès, that little simpleton, had betrayed
me after only eighteen months! Perhaps it had been going on a long while
already; and once more it was Raymond who---- But, in truth, I should
have foreseen it; it was certain to happen.
"But," I said to myself, "this will be your last escapade, Monsieur
Raymond; to-morrow I will call upon you with a pair of pistols, which I
will load myself."
The day was beginning to break; I went down into the street, ordered a
messenger to go to my room with me, gave him all my goods and chattels
to carry, and bade adieu to my home. Thenceforth I would resume my
bachelor life.
I had my bundles carried to my old apartment. Ah! how rejoiced I was
that I had kept it! It was as if I had divined that I should return to
it some day. Madame Dupont stared at my bundles.
"Does this mean that monsieur is going to sleep in his room now?" she
asked slyly.
"Yes, Madame Dupont; after this I am going to live as I used to."
That business completed, I took my weapons and went to Raymond's
apartment.
"Where are you going, monsieur?" inquired the concierge, when she saw me
hurrying upstairs.
"To Monsieur Raymond's."
"Why, monsieur, didn't you know that he'd gone away?"
"What's that? gone away?"
"To be sure; he didn't sleep here; he took his things away during the
night, paid his quarter's rent, and told me to sell his furniture,
saying that he'd send someone for the money after a while. I don't know
what had happened to him, but he seemed so confused that at first I
thought he'd gone mad; he was in such a hurry that he didn't take time
to pack the most necessary things. And then he rushed off without
telling me where he was going."
"The coward! Woe to him if I ever meet him! But he is quite capable of
having left Paris!"
I left Raymond's concierge in open-mouthed amazement and returned to Rue
Saint-Florentin, to arrange my little apartment with a view to resuming
my former habits.