"You dreamed of someone with whiskers who made your heart stop beating
in your tiny waist every time he looked at you."--_Home Notes._
* * * * *
"General, good plain cook; £45; flat, Maida Vale; constant hot water."
--_Times._
But why tell the poor woman beforehand?
* * * * *
"It recalls the distressing aphorism:
'Life is real, life is earnest,
And things are not what they seem.'"
_Liverpool Post and Mercury._
For example, this may seem like a quotation from the "Psalm of Life," but
it isn't.
* * * * *
[Illustration: A TEST OF SAGACITY.
MR. LLOYD GEORGE. "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WITH THE LETTERS I HAVE PLACED
BEFORE HIM OUR LEARNED FRIEND WILL NOW SPELL OUT SOMETHING THAT SIGNIFIES
THE GREATEST HAPPINESS FOR IRELAND."