The Pursuit of the Ideal

Freda's snuggery was aglow with the rose-red splendour of an open fire

which was triumphantly warding off the stealthy approaches of the dull

grey autumn twilight. Roger St. Clair stretched himself out

luxuriously in an easy-chair with a sigh of pleasure.

"Freda, your armchairs are the most comfy in the world. How do you get

them to fit into a fellow's kinks so splendidly?"

Freda smiled at him out of big, owlish eyes that were the same tint as

the coppery grey sea upon which the north window of the snuggery

looked.

"Any armchair will fit a lazy fellow's kinks," she said.

"I'm not lazy," protested Roger. "That you should say so, Freda, when

I have wheeled all the way out of town this dismal afternoon over the

worst bicycle road in three kingdoms to see you, bonnie maid!"

"I like lazy people," said Freda softly, tilting her spoon on a cup of

chocolate with a slender brown hand.

Roger smiled at her chummily.

"You are such a comfortable girl," he said. "I like to talk to you and

tell you things."

"You have something to tell me today. It has been fairly sticking out

of your eyes ever since you came. Now, 'fess."

Freda put away her cup and saucer, got up, and stood by the fireplace,

with one arm outstretched along the quaintly carved old mantel. She

laid her head down on its curve and looked expectantly at Roger.

"I have seen my ideal, Freda," said Roger gravely.

Freda lifted her head and then laid it down again. She did not speak.

Roger was glad of it. Even at the moment he found himself thinking

that Freda had a genius for silence. Any other girl he knew would have

broken in at once with surprised exclamations and questions and

spoiled his story.

"You have not forgotten what my ideal woman is like?" he said.

Freda shook her head. She was not likely to forget. She remembered

only too keenly the afternoon he had told her. They had been sitting

in the snuggery, herself in the inglenook, and Roger coiled up in his

big pet chair that nobody else ever sat in.

"'What must my lady be that I must love her?'" he had quoted. "Well, I

will paint my dream-love for you, Freda. She must be tall and slender,

with chestnut hair of wonderful gloss, with just the suggestion of a

ripple in it. She must have an oval face, colourless ivory in hue,

with the expression of a Madonna; and her eyes must be 'passionless,

peaceful blue,' deep and tender as a twilight sky."

Freda, looking at herself along her arm in the mirror, recalled this

description and smiled faintly. She was short and plump, with a

piquant, irregular little face, vivid tinting, curly, unmanageable

hair of ruddy brown, and big grey eyes. Certainly, she was not his

ideal.

"When and where did you meet your lady of the Madonna face and

twilight eyes?" she asked.

Roger frowned. Freda's face was solemn enough but her eyes looked as

if she might be laughing at him.

"I haven't met her yet. I have only seen her. It was in the park

yesterday. She was in a carriage with the Mandersons. So beautiful,

Freda! Our eyes met as she drove past and I realized that I had found

my long-sought ideal. I rushed back to town and hunted up Pete

Manderson at the club. Pete is a donkey but he has his ways of being

useful. He told me who she was. Her name is Stephanie Gardiner; she is

his cousin from the south and is visiting his mother. And, Freda, I am

to dine at the Mandersons' tonight. I shall meet her."

"Do goddesses and ideals and Madonnas eat?" said Freda in an awed

whisper. Her eyes were certainly laughing now. Roger got up stiffly.

"I must confess I did not expect that you would ridicule my

confidence, Freda," he said frigidly. "It is very unlike you. But if

you are not interested I will not bore you with any further details.

And it is time I was getting back to town anyhow."

When he had gone Freda ran to the west window and flung it open. She

leaned out and waved both hands at him over the spruce hedge.

"Roger, Roger, I was a horrid little beast. Forget it immediately,

please. And come out tomorrow and tell me all about her."

Roger came. He bored Freda terribly with his raptures but she never

betrayed it. She was all sympathy--or, at least, as much sympathy as a

woman can be who must listen while the man of men sings another

woman's praises to her. She sent Roger away in perfect good humour

with himself and all the world, then she curled herself up in the

snuggery, pulled a rug over her head, and cried.

Roger came out to Lowlands oftener than ever after that. He had to

talk to somebody about Stephanie Gardiner and Freda was the safest

vent. The "pursuit of the Ideal," as she called it, went on with vim

and fervour. Sometimes Roger would be on the heights of hope and

elation; the next visit he would be in the depths of despair and

humility. Freda had learned to tell which it was by the way he opened

the snuggery door.

One day when Roger came he found six feet of young man reposing at

ease in his particular chair. Freda was sipping chocolate in her

corner and looking over the rim of her cup at the intruder just as she

had been wont to look at Roger. She had on a new dark red gown and

looked vivid and rose-hued.

She introduced the stranger as Mr. Grayson and called him Tim. They

seemed to be excellent friends. Roger sat bolt upright on the edge of

a fragile, gilded chair which Freda kept to hide a shabby spot in the

carpet, and glared at Tim until the latter said goodbye and lounged

out.

"You'll be over tomorrow?" said Freda.

"Can't I come this evening?" he pleaded.

Freda nodded. "Yes--and we'll make taffy. You used to make such

delicious stuff, Tim."

"Who is that fellow, Freda?" Roger inquired crossly, as soon as the

door closed.

Freda began to make a fresh pot of chocolate. She smiled dreamily as

if thinking of something pleasant.

"Why, that was Tim Grayson--dear old Tim. He used to live next door to

us when we were children. And we were such chums--always together,

making mud pies, and getting into scrapes. He is just the same old

Tim, and is home from the west for a long visit. I was so glad to see

him again."

"So it would appear," said Roger grumpily. "Well, now that 'dear old

Tim' is gone, I suppose I can have my own chair, can I? And do give me

some chocolate. I didn't know you made taffy."

"Oh, I don't. It's Tim. He can do everything. He used to make it long

ago, and I washed up after him and helped him eat it. How is the

pursuit of the Ideal coming on, Roger-boy?"

Roger did not feel as if he wanted to talk about the Ideal. He noticed

how vivid Freda's smile was and how lovable were the curves of her

neck where the dusky curls were caught up from it. He had also an

inner vision of Freda making taffy with Tim and he did not approve of

it.

He refused to talk about the Ideal. On his way back to town he found

himself thinking that Freda had the most charming, glad little laugh

of any girl he knew. He suddenly remembered that he had never heard

the Ideal laugh. She smiled placidly--he had raved to Freda about that

smile--but she did not laugh. Roger began to wonder what an ideal

without any sense of humour would be like when translated into the

real.

He went to Lowlands the next afternoon and found Tim there--in his

chair again. He detested the fellow but he could not deny that he was

good-looking and had charming manners. Freda was very nice to Tim. On

his way back to town Roger decided that Tim was in love with Freda. He

was furious at the idea. The presumption of the man!

He also remembered that he had not said a word to Freda about the

Ideal. And he never did say much more--perhaps because he could not

get the chance. Tim was always there before him and generally

outstayed him.

One day when he went out he did not find Freda at home. Her aunt told

him that she was out riding with Mr. Grayson. On his way back he met

them. As they cantered by, Freda waved her riding whip at him. Her

face was full of warm, ripe, kissable tints, her loose lovelocks were

blowing about it, and her eyes shone like grey pools mirroring stars.

Roger turned and watched them out of sight behind the firs that cupped

Lowlands.

That night at Mrs. Crandall's dinner table somebody began to talk

about Freda. Roger strained his ears to listen. Mrs. Kitty Carr was

speaking--Mrs. Kitty knew everything and everybody.

"She is simply the most charming girl in the world when you get really

acquainted with her," said Mrs. Kitty, with the air of having

discovered and patented Freda. "She is so vivid and unconventional and

lovable--'spirit and fire and dew,' you know. Tim Grayson is a very

lucky fellow."

"Are they engaged?" someone asked.

"Not yet, I fancy. But of course it is only a question of time. Tim

simply adores her. He is a good soul and has lots of money, so he'll

do. But really, you know, I think a prince wouldn't be good enough for

Freda."

Roger suddenly became conscious that the Ideal was asking him a

question of which he had not heard a word. He apologized and was

forgiven. But he went home a very miserable man.

He did not go to Lowlands for two weeks. They were the longest, most

wretched two weeks he had ever lived through. One afternoon he heard

that Tim Grayson had gone back west. Mrs. Kitty told it mournfully.

"Of course, this means that Freda has refused him," she said. "She is

such an odd girl."

Roger went straight out to Lowlands. He found Freda in the snuggery

and held out his hands to her.

"Freda, will you marry me? It will take a lifetime to tell you how

much I love you."

"But the Ideal?" questioned Freda.

"I have just discovered what my ideal is," said Roger. "She is a dear,

loyal, companionable little girl, with the jolliest laugh and the

warmest, truest heart in the world. She has starry grey eyes, two

dimples, and a mouth I must and will kiss--there--there--there! Freda,

tell me you love me a little bit, although I've been such a besotted

idiot."

"I will not let you call my husband-that-is-to-be names," said Freda,

snuggling down into the curve of his shoulder. "But indeed, Roger-boy,

you will have to make me very, very happy to square matters up. You

have made me so unutterably unhappy for two months."

"The pursuit of the Ideal is ended," declared Roger.

Lucy Maud Montgomery Short Stories, 1904 · 第 19 / 21 题