Yesterday the Jews would have thrown me into the Jordan or stoned me
together with Timothy, my son in the faith, who instead of following me
round the hill shoulder kept straight on for Cæsarea, where I pray that
I may find him. These things you know of me, for three of the brethren
were on that balcony yesternight when, upheld by the will of God, my
feet were kept fast in the path that runs round this ravine. The Jews
had abandoned their hunt when I arrived at your door, awakening fear in
Brother Saddoc's heart that I was a robber or the head of some band of
robbers. Such thoughts must have disturbed his mind when he saw me, and
they were not driven off when I declared myself a prisoner to the
Romans; for he besought me to depart lest my presence should bring all
here within the grip of the Roman power. A hard and ruthless power it
may be, but less bitter than the power which the Jews crave from the
Romans to compel all to follow not the law alone, but the traditions
that have grown about the law. But you brethren who send no fat rams to
the Temple for sacrifice, but worship God out of your own hearts, will
have pity for me who have been persecuted by the Jews of Jerusalem (who
in their own eyes are the only Jews) for no reason but that I preach the
death and the resurrection from the dead of our Lord Jesus Christ, whose
apostle I am, being so made by himself when he spoke to me out of the
clouds on the road to Damascus.
Of this great wonder you shall hear in good time, but before beginning
the story you have asked me to relate I would before all calm Brother
Saddoc's fears: I am no prisoner as he imagines me to be, but am under
the law to return to Cæsarea, having appealed to Cæsar as was my right
to do, being a Roman citizen long persecuted by the Jews; and I would
thank you for the blankets I enjoyed last night and for the bread I have
broken with you. Also for the promise that I have that one of you shall
at nightfall put me on the way to Cæsarea and accompany me part of the
way, so that I may not fall into the hands of my enemies the Jews, of
Jerusalem, but shall reach Cæsarea to take ship for Rome. None of you
need fear anything; you have my assurances; I am here by the permission
of the noble Festus.
And now that you have learnt from me the hazard that cast me among you I
will tell you that I am a Jew like yourselves: one born in Tarsus, a
great city of Cilicia; a Roman citizen as you have heard from me, a
privilege which was not bought by me for a great sum of money, nor by
any act of mine, but inherited from my father, a Hebrew like yourselves,
and descended from the stock of Abraham like yourselves. And by trade a
weaver of that cloth of which tents are made; for my father gave me that
trade, for which I thank him, for by it I have earned my living these
many years, in various countries and cities. At an early age I was a
skilful hand at the loom, and at the same time learned in the
Scriptures, and my father, seeing a Rabbi in me, sent me to Jerusalem,
and while I was taught the law I remember hearing of the Baptist, and
the priests of the Temple muttering against him, but they were afraid to
send men against him, for he was in great favour with the people.
Afterwards I returned to Tarsus, where I worked daily at my loom until
tidings came to that city that a disciple of John was preaching the
destruction of the law, saying that he could destroy the Temple and
build it up again in three days. We spoke under our breaths in Tarsus of
this man, hardly able to believe that anyone could be so blasphemous and
reprobate, and when we heard of his death upon a cross we were overjoyed
and thought the Pharisees had done well; for we were full of zeal for
the traditions and the ancient glory of our people. We believed then
that heresy and blasphemy were at an end, and when news came of one
Stephen, who had revived all the stories that Jesus told, that the end
of the world was nigh and that the Temple could be destroyed and built
up again, I laid my loom aside and started for Jerusalem in great anger
to join with those who would root out the Nazarenes: we are now known as
Christians, the name given to us at Antioch.
I was telling that I laid aside my loom in Tarsus and set out for
Jerusalem to aid in rooting out the sect that I held to be blasphemous
and pernicious. Now on the day of my arrival in that city, while coming
from the Temple I saw three men hurrying by, one whose face was white as
the dead, with a small crowd following; and everyone saying: not here,
not here! And as they spoke stones were being gathered, and I knew that
they were for stoning the man they had with them, one Stephen, they
said, who had been teaching in the Temple that Jesus was born and died
and raised from the dead, and that since his death the law is of no
account. So did I gather news and with it abhorrence, and followed them
till they came to an angle, at which they said: this corner will do.
Stephen was thrown into it, and stones of all kinds were heaped upon him
till one spattered his brains along the wall, after which the crowd
muttered, we shall have no more of them.
That day I was of the crowd, and the stone that spattered the brains of
Stephen along the wall seemed to me to have been well cast; I hated
those who spoke against the law of our fathers, which I held in
reverence, as essential and to be practised for all time; and the mild
steadfastness in their faces, and the great love that shone in their
eyes when the name of our Lord Jesus Christ was mentioned, instead of
persuading me that I might be persecuting saints, exasperated me to
further misdeeds. I became foremost in these persecutions, and informed
by spies of the names of the saints, I made search in their houses at
the head of armed agents and dragged them into the synagogue, compelling
them to renounce the truth that the Messiah had come which had been
promised in the Scriptures. Nor was I satisfied when the last Nazarene
had been rooted out of Jerusalem, but cast my eyes forward to other
towns, into which the saints might have fled, and, hearing that many
were in Damascus, I got letters from the chief priests and started forth
in a fume of rage which I strove to blow up with the threats of what we
would put the saints to when we reached Damascus. But while the threats
were on my lips there was in my heart a mighty questioning, from which I
did not seem to escape, perhaps because I had not thrown a stone but
stood by an approving spectator merely. I know not how it was, but as we
forded the Jordan the cruelties that I had been guilty of, the
inquisitions, the beatings with rods, the imprisonment--all these things
rose up in my mind, a terrible troop of phantoms. Gentle faces and words
of forgiveness floated past me one night as we lay encamped in a great
quarry, and I asked myself again if these saints were what they seemed
to be; and soon after the thought crossed my mind that if the Nazarenes
were the saints that they seemed to be, bearing their flogging and
imprisonments with fortitude, without complaint, it was of persecuting
God I was guilty, since all goodness comes from God.
I had asked for letters from Hanan, the High Priest, that would give me
the right to arrest all ill thinkers, and to lead them back in chains to
Jerusalem, and these letters seemed to take fire in my bosom, and when
we came in view of the town, and saw the roofs between the trees, I
heard a voice crying to me: Saul, Saul, why persecutest thou me? It is
hard for thee to kick against the pricks; and trembling I fell forward,
my face upon the ground, and the Lord said: I am Jesus whom thou
persecutest. Arise, and go into the city and it shall be told to thee
what thou must do; by these words appointing me his apostle and
establishing my rights above those of Peter or John or James or any of
the twelve who walked with him whilst he lived as a man in Galilee. My
followers, who were merely stricken, but not blinded as I was, took me
by the arm and led me into Damascus, where I abode as a blind man till
Ananias laid his hands upon me and the scales fell from my eyes, and I
cried out for baptism, and having received baptism, which is spiritual
strength, and taken food, which is bodily, I went up to the synagogue to
preach that Jesus is the son of God, and continued till the Jews in that
city rose up against me and would have killed me if I had not escaped by
night, let down from the wall in a basket.
From Damascus I went into Arabia, and did not go up to Jerusalem for
three years to confer with the apostles, nor was there need that I
should do so, for had I not received my apostleship by direct
revelation? But after three years I went thither, hearing that the
persecutions had ceased, and that some of those whom I had persecuted
had returned. The brother of Jesus, James, had come down from Galilee
and as a holy man was a great power in Jerusalem. His prayers were
valued, and his appearance excited pity and belief that God would
hearken to him when he knelt, for he was naked but for a coarse cloth
hanging from his neck to his ankles. Of water and cleanliness he knew
naught, and his beard and hair grew as the weeds grow in the fields.
Peter, too, was in Jerusalem, and come into a great girth since the toil
of his craft, as a fisher, had been abandoned, as it had to be, for, as
ye know, it is dry desert about Jerusalem, without lakes or streams. But
he lived there better than he had ever lived before, by talking of our
Lord Jesus Christ, of whom it was no longer a danger to talk, for James
had made his brother acceptable in Jerusalem by lopping from him all
that was Jesus, making him according to his own image; with these
Christians he no longer stood up as an opponent of the law, but as one
who believed in it, who had said: I come not to abolish the law but to
confirm it. So did his brother James interpret Jesus to me who had heard
Jesus speak out of the spirit, and when I answered that he had said too
that he had come to abolish the law, James answered only that his
brother had said many things and that some were not as wise as others.
Peter, who was called upon to testify that Jesus wished the Jews to
remain Jews, and that circumcision and all the observances were needed,
answered that he did not know which was the truth, Jesus not having
spoken plainly on these matters, and neither one nor the other seemed to
understand that it was of no avail that Jesus should have been born,
should have died and been raised from the dead by his Father if the law
were to prevail unchanged for evermore. To James and to Peter Jesus was
a prophet, but no more than the prophets, and unable to understand
either Peter or Jesus, I returned to Tarsus broken-hearted, for there
did not seem to be on earth a true Christian but myself, and I knew not
whom to preach to, Gentiles or Jews. Only of one thing was I sure, that
the Lord Jesus Christ had spoken to me out of the clouds and ordained me
his apostle, but he had not pointed out the way, and I mourned that I
had gone up to Jerusalem, and abode in Tarsus disheartened, resuming my
loom, sitting at it from daylight till dark, waiting for some new sign
to be given me, for I did not lose hope altogether, but, knowing well
that the ways of Providence are not immediate, waited in patience or in
such patience as I might possess myself. Barnabas I had forgotten, and
he was forgotten when I said that I had met none in Jerusalem that could
be said to be a follower of the Master.
It was Barnabas who brought me to James, the brother of the Lord, and to
Peter, and told them that though I had persecuted I was now zealous, and
had preached in many synagogues that Christ Jesus had died and been
raised from the dead. But whether they feared me as a spy, one who would
betray them, or whether it was that our minds were divided upon many
things, I know not, but Barnabas could not persuade them, and, as I have
said, I left Jerusalem and returned to Tarsus, and resumed my trade,
until Barnabas, who had been sent to Antioch to meet some disciples,
said to them, but there is one at Tarsus who has preached the life and
death of our Lord Jesus Christ and brought many to believe in him. So
they said to him: go to Tarsus for this man and bring him hither. And
when they had seen and conferred with me and knew what sort of man I
was, Barnabas said, with your permission and your authority, Paul and I
will start together for Cyprus, for that is my country, and my friends
there will believe us when we tell them that Jesus was raised from the
dead and was seen by many: first by Martha and Mary, the sisters of
Lazarus, and afterwards by Peter and by the apostles and many others. As
the disciples were willing that we should go to preach the Gospel in
Cyprus, we went thither furnished with letters, and received a kindly
welcome from everybody, as it had been foretold by Barnabas, and many
heard the Gospel, and if my stay among you Essenes could be prolonged
beyond this evening and for several days I could tell you stories of a
great magician and how he was confuted by me by the grace of God working
through me, but as everything cannot be told in the first telling I will
pass from Cyprus back to Antioch, where we rested awhile, so that we
might tell the brethren of the great joy with which the faith had been
received in Cyprus, of the churches we founded and our promise to the
Cyprians to return to them.
And so joyful were the brethren in Antioch at our success that I said to
Barnabas: let us not tarry here, but go on into Galatia. We set out,
accompanied by John Mark, Barnabas' cousin, but he left us at Perga,
being afraid, and for his lack of courage I was unable to forgive him,
thereby estranging myself later on from Barnabas, a God-fearing man. But
to tell you what happened at Lystra. We found the people there ready to
listen to the faith, and it was given to me to set a cripple that had
never walked in his life straight upon his feet, and as sturdily as any.
The people cried out at this wonder, the gods have come down to us, and
when the rumour reached the High Priest that the gods had come to their
city, he drove out two oxen, garlanded, and would have sacrificed them
in our honour, but we tore our garments, saying, we are men like
yourselves and have come to preach that you should turn from vanities
and false gods and worship the one true living God, who created the
earth, and all the firmament. The people heard us and promised to abjure
their idolatries, and would have abjured them for ever if the Jews from
the neighbouring cities had not heard of our preaching and had not
gathered together and denounced us in Lystra, where there were no Jews,
or very few. Nor were they content with denouncing us, but on a
convenient occasion dragged Barnabas and myself outside the town, stoned
us and left us for dead, for we, knowing that God required us, feigned
death, thereby deceiving them and escaping death we returned to the town
by night and left it next day for Derbe.
Now, Essenes, this story that I tell of what happened to us at Lystra
has been told with some care by me, for it is significant of what has
happened to me for twenty years, since the day, as you have heard, when
the Lord Jesus himself spoke to me out of the clouds and appointed me to
preach the Gospel he had given unto me, which, upheld by him, I have
preached faithfully, followed wherever I went by persecution from Jews
determined to undo my work. But undeterred by stones and threats, we
returned to Lystra and preached there again, and in Perga and Attalia,
from thence we sailed to Antioch, and there were great rejoicings in
Saigon Street, as we sat in the doorways telling of the churches that we
founded in Galatia, and how we flung open the door of truth to the
pagans, and how many had passed through.
But some came from Jerusalem preaching that the uncircumcised could not
hope for salvation, and that there could be no conversion unless the law
be observed, and the first observance of the law, they said, is
circumcision. We answered them as is our wont that it is no longer by
observances of the law but by grace, through our Lord Jesus Christ, that
men may be saved; and we being unable to yield to them or they to us, it
was resolved that Barnabas and Titus, a Gentile that we brought over to
the faith, should go to Jerusalem.
On the way thither we preached that the Saviour promised to the Jews had
come, and been raised from the dead, and the Samaritans hearkened and
were converted in great numbers, and the news of these conversions
preceding us the joy among the brethren was very great, for you, who
know the Scriptures, need not be told that the conversion of the
Gentiles has been foretold; nor was it till we began to talk about the
abrogation of the law that James and the followers of James rose up
against us. We wondered, and said to each other: were ever two brothers
as unlike as these? Though myself had never seen the Lord in the flesh,
I knew of him from Peter, and we whispered together with our eyes fixed
on the long, lean man whose knees were reported callous from kneeling in
the Temple praying that God might not yet awhile destroy the world. It
was sufficient, so it was said, for him to hold up his hand to perform
miracles, and we came to dislike him and to remember that he had always
looked upon Jesus our Lord with suspicion during his lifetime. Why then,
we asked, should he come into power derived from his brother's glory?
He seemed to be less likely than any other Jew to understand the new
truth born into the world. So I turned from him to Peter, in whom I
thought to find an advocate, knowing him to be one with us in this,
saying that it were vain to ask the Gentiles to accept a yoke which the
Hebrews themselves had been unable to bear; but Peter was still the
timid man that he had ever been, and myself being of small wit in large
and violent assemblies said to him: thou and I and James will consult
together in private at the end of this uproar. But James could not come
to my reason, saying always that the Gentiles must become Jews before
they became Christians; and remembering very well all the trouble and
vexation the demand for the circumcision of Titus had put upon me (to
which I consented, for with a Jew I am a Jew so that I may gain them),
and how he had submitted himself lest he should be a stumbling-block, I
said to Timothy, my own son in the faith, thy mother and grandmother
were hearers of the law, and he answered, let me be a Jew externally,
and myself took and circumcised. A good accommodation Peter thought this
to be, and I said to Peter, henceforth for thee the circumcised and for
me the uncircumcised. Against which Peter and James had nothing to say,
for it seemed to them that the uncircumcised were one thing in Jerusalem
and another thing beyond Jerusalem. But I was glad thus to come to terms
with them, thinking thereby to obtain from them the confirmation of my
apostleship, though there was no need for any such, as I have always
held, it having teen bestowed upon me by our Lord Jesus Christ himself;
and holding it to be of little account that they had known our Lord
Jesus in the flesh, I said to their faces, it were better to have known
him in the spirit, thereby darkening them. It might have been better to
have held back the words.
Myself and Barnabas and Titus returned to Antioch and it was some days
after that I said to Barnabas: let us go again into the cities in which
we have preached and see if the brethren abide in our teaching and how
they do with it. But Barnabas would bring John Mark with him, he who had
left us before in Perga from cowardice of soul. Therefore I chose Silas
and departed. He was our warrant that we were one with the Church of
Jerusalem, which was true inasmuch as we were willing to yield all but
essential things so that everybody, Jews and Gentiles, might be brought
into communion with Jesus Christ.
We went together to Lystra and Mysia, preaching in all these towns, and
the brethren were confirmed in their faith in us, and leaving them we
were about to set out for Bithynia and would have gone thither had we
not been warned one night by the Holy Breath to go back, and instead we
went to Troas, where one night a vision came to me in my sleep: a man
stood before me at the foot of my bed, a Macedonian I knew him to be, by
his dress and speech, for he spoke not the broken Greek that I speak,
but pure Greek, the Greek that Mathias speaks, and he told me that we
were to go over into Macedonia.
To tell of all the countries we visited and the towns in which we
preached, and the many that were received into the faith, would be a
story that would carry us through the night and into the next day, for
it would be the story of my life, and every life is long when it is put
into words; nor would the story be profitable unto you in any great
measure, though it be full of various incidents. But I am behoven to
tell that wherever we went the persecution that began in Lystra followed
us. As soon as the Jews heard of our conversions they assembled either
to assault us or to lay complaints before the Roman magistrates, as they
did at Philippi, the chief city of Macedonia. Among my miracles was the
conversion of a slave, a pythonist, a teller of fortunes, a caster of
horoscopes, who brought her master good money by her divinations, and
seeing that he would profit thereby no longer, he drew myself and Silas
into the market-place and calling for help of others had us brought
before the rulers, and the pleading of the man was, and he was supported
by others, that we taught many things that it was not lawful of them,
being Jews, to hearken to, and the magistrates, wishing to please the
multitude, commanded us to be beaten, and when many stripes had been
laid on us we were cast into prison, and the jailer being charged to
keep us in safety thrust our feet into the stocks.
Myself and Silas prayed and sang praises unto God despite our wounds,
and as if in response there was a great earthquake, and the prison was
shaken and all the doors opened, on seeing which the keeper of the
prison drew his sword and would have fallen upon it, believing that the
prisoners had fled, if I had not cried to him in a loud voice: there is
no reason to kill thyself, for thy charges are here. What may I do to be
saved? he said, being greatly astonished at the miracle, and we
answered: believe in the Lord Jesus Christ. Thereupon he invited us into
his house and set food before us, and he was baptized and bidden to have
no fear, for we confided to him that we were Romans, and that the
magistrates would tremble when they heard that they had ordered a
citizen of Rome to be beaten and him uncondemned. Why, he asked, did ye
not declare yourselves to be Romans? Because, we answered, we were
minded to suffer for our Lord Jesus Christ's son, at which he wondered
and gave thanks. He was baptized by us, and when he had carried the news
of their mistake to the ears of the magistrates they sent sergeants
saying that we were to be allowed to go. But we refused to leave the
prison, saying, we are Romans and have been beaten uncondemned. Let the
magistrates come to fetch us. Which message being taken to them they
came beseeching us to go, and not to injure them, for they had done
wrong unwittingly, and taking pity of them for the sake of our Lord
Jesus Christ we passed into Thessalonica, where I preached in the
synagogues for three Sabbaths and reasoned with the Jews, showing them
passages in the Scriptures confirming all that we said to them about the
Christ that had suffered and been raised from the dead. Some believed,
and others assaulted the house of Jason, in which we were living, and
the Romans were perplexed to know how to keep order, for wherever we
went there were stirs and quarrels among the Jews, the fault being with
them and not with us. In Corinth too the Jews pleaded against us before
the Roman magistrates and----