19. The Wizard Performs Another Trick

At three o'clock the Throne Room was crowded with citizens, men, women

and children being eager to witness the great trial.

Princess Ozma, dressed in her most splendid robes of state, sat in the

magnificent emerald throne, with her jewelled sceptre in her hand and

her sparkling coronet upon her fair brow. Behind her throne stood the

twenty-eight officers of her army and many officials of the royal

household. At her right sat the queerly assorted Jury--animals,

animated dummies and people--all gravely prepared to listen to what was

said. The kitten had been placed in a large cage just before the

throne, where she sat upon her haunches and gazed through the bars at

the crowds around her, with seeming unconcern.

And now, at a signal from Ozma, the Woggle-Bug arose and addressed the

jury. His tone was pompous and he strutted up and down in an absurd

attempt to appear dignified.

"Your Royal Highness and Fellow Citizens," he began; "the small cat you

see a prisoner before you is accused of the crime of first murdering

and then eating our esteemed Ruler's fat piglet--or else first eating

and then murdering it. In either case a grave crime has been committed

which deserves a grave punishment."

"Do you mean my kitten must be put in a grave?" asked Dorothy.

"Don't interrupt, little girl," said the Woggle-Bug. "When I get my

thoughts arranged in good order I do not like to have anything upset

them or throw them into confusion."

"If your thoughts were any good they wouldn't become confused,"

remarked the Scarecrow, earnestly. "My thoughts are always--"

"Is this a trial of thoughts, or of kittens?" demanded the Woggle-Bug.

"It's a trial of one kitten," replied the Scarecrow; "but your manner

is a trial to us all."

"Let the Public Accuser continue," called Ozma from her throne, "and I

pray you do not interrupt him."

"The criminal who now sits before the court licking her paws," resumed

the Woggle-Bug, "has long desired to unlawfully eat the fat piglet,

which was no bigger than a mouse. And finally she made a wicked plan

to satisfy her depraved appetite for pork. I can see her, in my mind's

eye--"

"What's that?" asked the Scarecrow.

"I say I can see her in my mind's eye--"

"The mind has no eye," declared the Scarecrow. "It's blind."

"Your Highness," cried the Woggle-Bug, appealing to Ozma, "have I a

mind's eye, or haven't I?"

"If you have, it is invisible," said the Princess.

"Very true," returned the Woggle-Bug, bowing. "I say I see the

criminal, in my mind's eye, creeping stealthily into the room of our

Ozma and secreting herself, when no one was looking, until the Princess

had gone away and the door was closed. Then the murderer was alone

with her helpless victim, the fat piglet, and I see her pounce upon the

innocent creature and eat it up--"

"Are you still seeing with your mind's eye?" enquired the Scarecrow.

"Of course; how else could I see it? And we know the thing is true,

because since the time of that interview there is no piglet to be found

anywhere."

"I suppose, if the cat had been gone, instead of the piglet, your

mind's eye would see the piglet eating the cat," suggested the

Scarecrow.

"Very likely," acknowledged the Woggle-Bug. "And now, Fellow Citizens

and Creatures of the Jury, I assert that so awful a crime deserves

death, and in the case of the ferocious criminal before you--who is now

washing her face--the death penalty should be inflicted nine times."

There was great applause when the speaker sat down. Then the Princess

spoke in a stern voice:

"Prisoner, what have you to say for yourself? Are you guilty, or not

guilty?"

"Why, that's for you to find out," replied Eureka. "If you can prove

I'm guilty, I'll be willing to die nine times, but a mind's eye is no

proof, because the Woggle-Bug has no mind to see with."

"Never mind, dear," said Dorothy.

Then the Tin Woodman arose and said:

"Respected Jury and dearly beloved Ozma, I pray you not to judge this

feline prisoner unfeelingly. I do not think the innocent kitten can be

guilty, and surely it is unkind to accuse a luncheon of being a murder.

Eureka is the sweet pet of a lovely little girl whom we all admire, and

gentleness and innocence are her chief virtues. Look at the kitten's

intelligent eyes;" (here Eureka closed her eyes sleepily) "gaze at her

smiling countenance!" (here Eureka snarled and showed her teeth) "mark

the tender pose of her soft, padded little hands!" (Here Eureka bared

her sharp claws and scratched at the bars of the cage.) "Would such a

gentle animal be guilty of eating a fellow creature? No; a thousand

times, no!"

"Oh, cut it short," said Eureka; "you've talked long enough."

"I'm trying to defend you," remonstrated the Tin Woodman.

"Then say something sensible," retorted the kitten. "Tell them it

would be foolish for me to eat the piglet, because I had sense enough

to know it would raise a row if I did. But don't try to make out I'm

too innocent to eat a fat piglet if I could do it and not be found out.

I imagine it would taste mighty good."

"Perhaps it would, to those who eat," remarked the Tin Woodman. "I

myself, not being built to eat, have no personal experience in such

matters. But I remember that our great poet once said:

'To eat is sweet

When hunger's seat

Demands a treat

Of savory meat.'"

"Take this into consideration, friends of the Jury, and you will

readily decide that the kitten is wrongfully accused and should be set

at liberty."

When the Tin Woodman sat down no one applauded him, for his arguments

had not been very convincing and few believed that he had proved

Eureka's innocence. As for the Jury, the members whispered to each

other for a few minutes and then they appointed the Hungry Tiger their

spokesman. The huge beast slowly arose and said:

"Kittens have no consciences, so they eat whatever pleases them. The

jury believes the white kitten known as Eureka is guilty of having

eaten the piglet owned by Princess Ozma, and recommends that she be put

to death in punishment of the crime."

The judgment of the jury was received with great applause, although

Dorothy was sobbing miserably at the fate of her pet. The Princess was

just about to order Eureka's head chopped off with the Tin Woodman's

axe when that brilliant personage once more arose and addressed her.

"Your Highness," said he, "see how easy it is for a jury to be

mistaken. The kitten could not have eaten your piglet--for here it is!"

He took off his funnel hat and from beneath it produced a tiny white

piglet, which he held aloft that all might see it clearly.

Ozma was delighted and exclaimed, eagerly:

"Give me my pet, Nick Chopper!"

And all the people cheered and clapped their hands, rejoicing that the

prisoner had escaped death and been proved to be innocent.

As the Princess held the white piglet in her arms and stroked its soft

hair she said: "Let Eureka out of the cage, for she is no longer a

prisoner, but our good friend. Where did you find my missing pet, Nick

Chopper?"

"In a room of the palace," he answered.

"Justice," remarked the Scarecrow, with a sigh, "is a dangerous thing

to meddle with. If you hadn't happened to find the piglet, Eureka

would surely have been executed."

"But justice prevailed at the last," said Ozma, "for here is my pet,

and Eureka is once more free."

"I refuse to be free," cried the kitten, in a sharp voice, "unless the

Wizard can do his trick with eight piglets. If he can produce but

seven, then this is not the piglet that was lost, but another one."

"Hush, Eureka!" warned the Wizard.

"Don't be foolish," advised the Tin Woodman, "or you may be sorry for

it."

"The piglet that belonged to the Princess wore an emerald collar," said

Eureka, loudly enough for all to hear.

"So it did!" exclaimed Ozma. "This cannot be the one the Wizard gave

me."

"Of course not; he had nine of them, altogether," declared Eureka; "and

I must say it was very stingy of him not to let me eat just a few. But

now that this foolish trial is ended, I will tell you what really

became of your pet piglet."

At this everyone in the Throne Room suddenly became quiet, and the

kitten continued, in a calm, mocking tone of voice:

"I will confess that I intended to eat the little pig for my breakfast;

so I crept into the room where it was kept while the Princess was

dressing and hid myself under a chair. When Ozma went away she closed

the door and left her pet on the table. At once I jumped up and told

the piglet not to make a fuss, for he would be inside of me in half a

second; but no one can teach one of these creatures to be reasonable.

Instead of keeping still, so I could eat him comfortably, he trembled

so with fear that he fell off the table into a big vase that was

standing on the floor. The vase had a very small neck, and spread out

at the top like a bowl. At first the piglet stuck in the neck of the

vase and I thought I should get him, after all, but he wriggled himself

through and fell down into the deep bottom part--and I suppose he's

there yet."

All were astonished at this confession, and Ozma at once sent an

officer to her room to fetch the vase. When he returned the Princess

looked down the narrow neck of the big ornament and discovered her lost

piglet, just as Eureka had said she would.

There was no way to get the creature out without breaking the vase, so

the Tin Woodman smashed it with his axe and set the little prisoner

free.

Then the crowd cheered lustily and Dorothy hugged the kitten in her

arms and told her how delighted she was to know that she was innocent.

"But why didn't you tell us at first?" she asked.

"It would have spoiled the fun," replied the kitten, yawning.

Ozma gave the Wizard back the piglet he had so kindly allowed Nick

Chopper to substitute for the lost one, and then she carried her own

into the apartments of the palace where she lived. And now, the trial

being over, the good citizens of the Emerald City scattered to their

homes, well content with the day's amusement.

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