P.S. They might have served the cause in which they have engaged more
effectually, had their proceedings been less violent and offensive.
They do but nerve me in resolution. The less public they had made the
affair the more they would have shewn their generalship. If they be
thus determined to brand me, can they suppose that my vengeance shall
not outstrip theirs? I own I am perplexed about the means--Invention
fails me! I have debated whether I should call in the aid of Mac Fane;
but the idea is too detestable!--No! I would rather take a pair of
pistols, and dispatch her first and myself next, than expose her
beauties to such ruffian despicable rascals!--Beside I would have her
will concerned--And how to conquer that?--I shall be driven, I foresee
I shall, to some unheard-of act of desperation!--Drugs are a mean a
pitiful expedient: not to mention that she is aware of them, and uses a
kind of caution which it would be difficult to overcome. She reserves
the meal of one day for the next, after having suffered Laura to eat
her part; so that inanity, sleep or other effects, if produced, would
first appear in the maid. This perhaps is one of the reasons by which
she is induced still to keep her: and were she removed, and could
suspect it were for this purpose, I am convinced she would eat no
more--No!--She must be fairly told the deep despair of my mind! and if
that will not move her, why then--Death!