LOYAL LOVE
When little Jack was nearly nine years old he came home from school one
afternoon in a sorry plight. Not only was his face tear-stained, but
his jacket was torn. There was every evidence that he had been in a
battle, and had not come off victor, either. Fortunately, his mother was
away spending the afternoon with her father and sister.
"My dear boy!" exclaimed Nanna; "what ever have you been doing!"
"Don't be cross with me, Nanna," cried out Jack, literally throwing
himself into her arms, "I couldn't help myself. You would have done the
same yourself." His arms were round her neck, and he was hugging her so
tightly that she found it rather difficult to get her words out. The
hugging really seemed to comfort him. Nanna felt alarmed, for it was so
unusual for Jack to shed a tear or to be so demonstrative. Trying with
one hand to loosen his grasp, and with the other stroking his tangled
hair, she said: "You surely could never imagine your old Nanna mixed up
with a fight, now could you? A pretty figure I should cut, shouldn't I?"
"Well, you would have done something; I know you would," sobbed out the
little fellow, who could no longer keep the tears back.
"Ah, no doubt I should have done something; you're right there. But tell
me what it's all about? Whatever will mummy say about it! And what do
you suppose your little angel-sister thinks of you if she is looking at
you now?"
The thought of the "little angel-sister" did not distress him much; but
at the mention of "mummy" his grief broke out afresh.
"But you won't tell her, will you? And you'll mend my jacket for me,
won't you?" taking his arms down from her neck to show the ugly rent by
the pocket.
"Not tell mummy? Keep anything from mummy? Why, Jack, what can you be
thinking about? She would not like her boy to have any trouble she did
not share. And if you have done wrong all that she will do will be to
give you advice that might help you another time."
"I know, I know," and the voice was a little fretful, an unusual thing
for Jack, "but you don't understand: it's because it would make mummy
cry I don't want her to know."
"Well, tell me all about it, and then I shall understand."
"And you won't tell her?"
Nanna felt to be in a difficulty, and had to think. Jack saw the
difficulty she was in, and, like the chivalrous little fellow he was,
helped her out of it by saying, "I'll tell you first, and then I know
you'll say she mustn't know, and Janie must not know," getting down from
her knee and shutting the door--"nobody must know."
Resuming his seat, and with one arm round her neck, he told out his
little tale of woe, the tale that was so big to him. A fresh boy had
come to his school whose displeasure he had won by obstinately keeping
at the top of the class, a position keenly coveted by the new boy, whose
name was Frank Bell.
Knowing of no other invective he could hurl at his rival, Frank tried
this one: "You're no good; you've no business among respectable boys.
Your mother's a wicked woman, and that's why your father can't live with
her. My ma says so; I heard her."
"I told him she was as good as good could be, better than his mother,
for my mother held meetings and his mother didn't. So he said he'd pay
me out for calling his mother names, and after school he hit me in the
face, and I hit him back."
"And you got the worst of it?"
"He's ever so much bigger than I am. My mother is good, isn't she?"
lifting up his tear-stained face to look steadfastly at Nanna. There was
no doubt in the loyal little heart of the mother's goodness, but there
was one big mystery in his life he could not solve, and he wondered if
Nanna could help him--or, would help him.
"Of course she is good; we both of us know that."
"If only daddy would come home! If he would, then Frank couldn't say
anything." He watched her face attentively--the face that had always had
truth written on it, that had never kept a secret from him.
"I wish he would, too; but I don't know why he doesn't, and mummy
doesn't know either. Perhaps--but you must not speak of this--perhaps he
is dead. Sometimes we think he must be."
"Poor daddy!" murmured the child, and then turned to look at his photo
hanging over the mantelpiece.
"But, Jack, dear, I want to show you where you have done wrong and how
you must be wiser another time. It does not matter what any number of
boys say about your mother; it could not alter the fact of her goodness.
You need only have said he was making a mistake. Then you should not
have questioned his mother's goodness; it is quite right for him to
think his mother better than yours--every boy should think his mother
the best that ever was. And then, when he struck you, you should not
have struck back--that's what cowards do, heroes quietly walk away. You
remember what our dear Jesus said, that when anybody strikes us on one
cheek, we are to let them do it on the other side, too, if they like."
Jack sighed. Life to him just then was indeed an "unsunned space," and
it seemed getting darker. It was bad enough to have had his dear mummy
so wickedly spoken about, but to be struck and not retaliate! And now
Nanna was disappointed in him. There came another deep sigh.
"Don't sigh, little man. It is by these mistakes we learn. You will be
wiser next time, so cheer up. Let us ask Jesus to forgive us all our
mistakes. We can afford to forget all about them then."
In the most natural way possible the two knelt down and made their
request of the invisible Master, whose presence in that room was always
acknowledged. It was by no means the first time these two had done so.
Jack was not at all surprised or confused.
Prayer over, Nanna set about preparing tea, and Jack, still
disconsolate, sat by the fire. His own share of the pain was forgotten,
but he could not feel happy about his "mummy." He did not want her to
know, and yet he longed to hear from her own dear lips that she did not
mind.
"You won't tell mummy, will you?" he pleaded before going to bed, and
the promise was given. "Not till you say I may," said wise, far-seeing
Nanna. The burden of having a secret from mummy was a heavy one, and
Nanna felt sure it would not be long before it all came out, and that
the loving little heart would only find peace in the mother's arms.
Phebe that night went in as usual to give Jack his "good-night" kiss. He
had cried himself to sleep. He had even laughed at supper-time, and
forgotten all his sorrow, but in the darkness of the bedroom it had come
back again with full force.
The mother bent to kiss her boy--the face was damp--Jack had been
crying! Nanna had said nothing about any trouble, yet she was always
Jack's confidante. What could it be? She bent again to kiss him. Yes, it
was quite damp--the pillow even was damp. Her sunny-faced, earnest,
eager-hearted Jack, crying! The boy sighed in his sleep, tossed about,
and then, the light of the lamp falling on his face, he woke up.
"Oh, mummy! dear mummy!" The lamp was quickly put down, and in an
instant the two were locked in each other's arms.
"Jack, darling, you've been crying. You must tell me all about it."
"But I can't--no--you are not to ask me."
And then straightway he told her, though not in words. He smoothed her
face, he examined her, then he hugged her, and whispered:
"It is my _good_ mummy!"
"Has somebody been telling you I'm not good?"
"Did Nanna tell you?" he exclaimed. "Oh, dear, she promised she
wouldn't!"
"No, darling; Nanna did not tell me. She would not break her promise to
you."
"Then how did you know?"
She could hardly explain. "I guessed it," she said. "I saw you had been
crying. Who was it that was finding fault with me?"
"Frank Bell; he's a new scholar." The name was not familiar.
"See here, darling, you must never trouble about me. You know I do
things differently from some mothers, and they think it is wrong, but I
think it is God's wish; so it does not much matter. You understand?"
"Yes." Then, after a pause: "And it has not anything to do with daddy
not coming home?"
There is a sisterhood of Mary found the wide world over--women who have
felt the sword pierce the soul, and in that instant Phebe felt afresh
what membership with that sisterhood meant. But her child, at all costs,
must not know of it.
"No, nothing at all," was her calm answer.
And then came the story of the fight and the torn jacket. It was so nice
to be able to tell her everything, and to know she was not hurt at all.
"What, my Jack been in a battle!" trying hard to laugh.
"Yes; but Nanna has mended my jacket, you'd never know it was torn, and
I'm never going to fight again. Nanna says heroes walk away, and that
must be so, 'cause it's harder."
"Nanna's right, you dear little champion!"
"When I am a man, nobody will dare to say you're not good."
"Yes, they will, dear. You know Jesus told us to beware if everybody
spoke well of us. That would show we were not quite brave enough."
But the child spoke truer than she knew.
The next morning Phebe sent Frank Bell a box of chocolate, which Jack
willingly delivered.
To say that Frank was mystified is putting it very mildly.
"For me?" he exclaimed.
"Yes, mother sent it you."
"Does she know what I said about her?"
"Yes, but I didn't tell her. I had to tell Nanna because of my jacket."
Frank thought Nanna was the servant. He wanted very much to "round on"
Jack for telling, but did not know how fairly to do it.
"She knew what I said about her, and yet sent me this chocolate!"
"Yes, you see she's a real Christian--Nanna says she's one of the right
sort."
"Well, she must be; my father's a Christian, but I don't speck he'd
send anybody chocolates that snubbed _him_," and the very idea made the
boy laugh.
"You'll never say she's wicked again, will you?" pleaded Jack wistfully.
"That I won't, I'll say she's a stunner, and she is, too!" And from that
moment Phebe Waring had no more brave defender than chubby-faced Frank
Bell.
That same morning Phebe got a few minutes' talk with Nanna: "Jack told
me last night you knew all about his little battle and what occasioned
it."
"Yes, he did," said Nanna, turning round to look at her carefully. She
was not quite sure how much Phebe knew, nor how she would take it. The
look satisfied her.
"I only want to say," said Phebe, "that you need not worry about it for
my sake. I have been so happy lately that I can afford to have a little
drawback like that. Perhaps God saw I needed something to keep me
humble."
But she could not have spoken in that brave tone twelve hours before.
She knew that, and Nanna guessed it too.
"Ah!" said Nanna, "it wouldn't do for us any more than for the trees to
have all sunshine and never have a storm."
Yes, Phebe had been very blessed lately, and she not only knew it, but
had drunk in all the joy of it. The railway-works had long since been
completed, and the hall had been taken down and stored. Most of the men
had been scattered all over the country, many of them taking with them
the precious secret learnt from a woman's lips, but some still remained
in Hadley and the neighbourhood, and these had persuaded Phebe to
continue the meetings in the public hall. She had done so, and very
happy gatherings they had proved to be.
Every week the further scheme she had in her mind took deeper root: the
more she saw of working-men, of their hard life and colourless
existence, the more she pitied them. The scheme was often talked over
with faithful Nanna, whose brain was as keen as ever, though her body
was more bent. More than once she advised Phebe to consult Stephen
Collins, but Phebe could not trust herself to do that, knowing too well
that temptation lay in that direction.
"Besides," she would add, "I have not money enough yet. Love's Hospital
was not my gift--the money simply was passed on by me. This time God
seems to show that I have to work for the money, storing it up little by
little. When I have enough and have got my plans all settled, I'll ask
Stephen to carry them out for me. I don't mind doing that; it would not
take long."