THE DISTANT COUSINS
The end of the week found Brock quite thoroughly domesticated--to use an
expression supplied by his new sister-in-law. True, he had gone through
some trying ordeals and had lost not a little of his sense of locality,
but he was rapidly recovering it as the pathway became easier and less
obscure. At first he was irritatingly remiss in answering to the name of
Medcroft; but, to justify the stupidity, it is only necessary to say
that he had fallen into a condition which scarcely permitted him to know
his own name, much less that of another. He was under the spell!
Wherefore it did not matter at all what name he went by: he would have
answered as readily to one as the other.
He blandly ignored telegrams and letters addressed to Roxbury Medcroft,
and once he sat like a lump, with everyone staring at him, when the
chairman of the architects' convention asked if Mr. Medcroft had
anything to say on the subject under discussion. He was forced, in some
confusion, to attribute his heedlessness to a life-long defect in
hearing. Thereafter it was his punishment to have his name and fragments
of conversation hurled about in tones so stentorian that he blushed for
very shame. In the Bristol, in the Kärntner-Ring, in the Lichtenstein
Gallery, in the Gardens--no matter where he went--if he were to be
accosted by any of the genial architects it was always in a voice that
attracted attention; he could have heard them if they had been a block
away. It became a habit with him to instinctively lift his hand to his
ear when one of them hove in sight, having seen him first.
"That's what I get for being a liar," he lamented dolefully. Constance
had just whispered her condolences. "Do you think they'll consider it
odd that you don't shout at me too?"
"You might explain that you can tell what I am saying by looking at my
lips," she said. He was immensely relieved.
Considerable difficulty had to be overcome at the Bristol in the matter
of rooms. Without going into details, Brock resignedly took the only
room left in the crowded hotel--a six by ten cubby-hole on the top floor
overlooking the air-shaft. He had to go down one flight for his morning
tub, and he never got it because he refused to stand in line and await
his turn. Mrs. Medcroft had the choicest room in the hotel, looking down
upon the beautiful Kärntner-Ring. Constance proposed, in the goodness of
her heart, to give up to Brock her own room, adjoining that of her
sister, provided Edith would take her in to sleep with her. Edith was
perfectly willing, but interposed the sage conclusion that gossiping
menials might not appreciate a preference so unique.
Mr. Roxbury Medcroft's sky parlour adjoined the elevator shaft. The head
of his bed was in close proximity to the upper mechanism of the lift, a
thin wall intervening. A French architect, who had a room hard by, met
Brock in the hall, hollow-eyed and haggard, on the morning after their
first night. He shouted lugubrious congratulations in Brock's ear, just
as if Brock's ear had not been harassed a whole night long by shrieking
wheels and rasping cables.
"Monsieur is very fortunate in being so afflicted," he boomed. "A
thousand times in the night have I wished that I might be deaf also. Ah,
even an affliction such as yours, monsieur, has its benedictions!"
Matters drifted along smoothly, even merrily, for several days. They
were all young and full of the joy of living. They laughed in secret
over the mishaps and perils; they whiffed and enjoyed the spice that
filled the atmosphere in which they lived. They visited the gardens and
the Hofs, the Chateau at Schönbrunn, the Imperial stables, the gay
"Venice in Vienna"; they attended the opera and the concerts, ever in a
most circumspect "trinity," as Brock had come to classify their parties.
Like a dutiful husband, he always included his wife in the expeditions.
"You are not only a most exemplary wife, Mrs. Medcroft," he declared,
"but an unusually agreeable chaperon. I don't know how Constance and I
could get on without you."
But the day of severest trial was now at hand. The Rodneys were arriving
on the fifth day from Berlin. Despite the fact that the Seattle
"connections" had never seen the illustrious Medcroft, husband to their
distant cousin, there still remained the disturbing fear that they would
recognise--or rather fail to recognise him!--from chance pictures that
might have come to their notice. Besides, there was always the
possibility that they had seen or even met Brock in New York. He
lugubriously admitted that he had met unfortunate thousands whom he had
promptly forgotten but who seldom failed to remember him. It is not
surprising, then, that the Medcrofts, _ex parte_, were in a state of
perturbation,--a condition which did not relax in the least as the time
drew near for the arrival of the five o'clock train from the north.
Constance strove faithfully, even valiantly, to inject confidence into
the souls of the prime conspirators.
"You have done so beautifully up to this time," she protested to the
dolorous Brock, "why should you be afraid? I once read of an Indian
chief whose name was Young-Man-Afraid-of-his-Wife! He was a very brave
fellow in spite of all that. You are afraid of Edith, but can't you be
like the Indian? He--"
"That's all very nice," mourned Brock, "but he could cover his confusion
with war paint. Don't forget that, my dear. Think of the difference in
our disguises! War paint in daubs versus spats and an eyeglass. Besides,
he didn't have to talk West End English. And, moreover, he lived in a
wigwam, and didn't have to explain a sky bedroom to strangers who
happened along."
"That is a bit awkward," she confessed thoughtfully. "But can't you say
that you have insomnia, and can't sleep unless you are above the noise
of the street?"
He looked at her with an expression that made a verbal reply to this
suggestion altogether unnecessary.
"Nurse says that Tootles has forgotten the real Roxbury," she went on,
after a moment. "See how cleverly you have played the part."
Still he stared moodily, unconvinced, at the roadway ahead. They were
driving in the Haupt Allee.
"I hope I haven't got Roxbury into trouble by that interview I gave out
concerning the new method of fire-proofing woodwork in office buildings
and hotels. It occurred to me afterward that he is violently opposed to
the system. I advocated it. He'll have a--I might say, a devil of a time
explaining his change of front."
As a matter of fact, when Medcroft, hiding in London, saw the reproduced
interview in the "Times," together with editorial comments upon the
extraordinary attitude of a supposedly conservative Englishman of
recognised ability, he was tried almost beyond endurance. For the next
two or three days the newspapers printed caustic contributions from
fellow architects and builders, in each of which the luckless Medcroft
was taken to task for advocating an impractical and fatuous New York
hobby in the way of construction,--something that staid old London would
not even tolerate or discuss. The social chroniclings of the Medcrofts
in Vienna, as despatched by the correspondents, offset this unhappy
"bull" to some extent, in so far as Medcroft's peace of mind was
concerned, but nothing could have drawn attention to the fact that he
was not in London at that particular time so decisively as the Vienna
interview and its undefended front. Even his shrewdest enemy could not
have suspected Medcroft of a patience which would permit him to sit
quiet in London while the attacks were going on. He found some small
solace in the reflection that he could make the end justify the means.
On their return to the Bristol, Brock and Miss Fowler found the fair
Edith in a pitiful state of collapse. She declared over and over again
that she could not face the Rodneys; it was more than should be expected
of her; she was sure that something would go wrong; why, oh, why was it
necessary to deceive the Rodneys? Why should they be kept in the dark?
Why wasn't Roxbury there to counsel wisely--and more, _ad infinitum_,
until the distracted pair were on the point of deserting the cause. She
finally dissolved into tears, and would not listen to reason,
expostulation, or persuasion. It was then that Brock cruelly but
effectively declared his intention to abdicate, as he also had a
reputation to preserve. Whereupon, with a fine sense of distinction, she
flared up and accused him of treachery to his best friend, Roxbury
Medcroft, who was reposing the utmost confidence in his friendship and
loyalty. How could she be expected to go on with the play if he, the man
upon whom everything depended, was to turn tail in a critical hour like
this?
"How can you have the heart to spoil everything?" she cried indignantly.
He looked at her in fresh amazement. "Roxbury would never forgive you.
We have both placed the utmost confidence in you, Mr. Brock, and--"
"'Sh! Say 'Roxbury, dear'!" interposed the practical Constance. "The
walls may have ears, my dears."
Then Mrs. Medcroft plaintively implored his forgiveness, and said that
she was miserable and ashamed and very unappreciative. Brock, in deep
humility, begged her pardon for his unnecessary harshness, and promised
not to offend again.
"The first quarrel," cried Constance delightedly. "How nicely you've
made it up. And you've been married less than a week!"
"Roxbury and I didn't have our first quarrel until we'd been married a
year," said Edith reflectively.
"Oh, I say, Edith," exclaimed Brock, with a dark frown, "I'd rather you
wouldn't be forever extolling the good qualities of my predecessor. It's
very bad taste. Very much like the pies mother used to make."
"Silly!" cried Medcroft's wife, now in fine humour.
"Besides, Rox is an Englishman. It would take him a year to produce a
quarrel. The American husband is not so confounded slow. I won't live up
to Roxbury in everything."
It was decided that Constance should greet the Rodneys upon their
arrival; the Medcrofts were not to appear until dinner time. Afterwards
the entire party would attend the opera, which was then in the closing
week. Brock, with splendid prodigality, had taken a box for the final
performance of "Tristan and Isolde." It is not out of place to remark
that Brock loathed the Wagnerian opera; he was of "The Mikado" cult. He
took the seats with a definite purpose in mind to cast the burden of
responsibility upon his wife, who would be forced to extend herself in
the capacity of hostess, giving him the much-needed opportunity to
secure safe footing in the dark area of uncertainty. He believed himself
capable of diverting the youthful Miss Rodney and his discreet
sister-in-law, but he was consumed by an unholy dread of Rodney _père_;
something told him that this shrewd American business man was not the
kind who would have the wool pulled over his eyes by anyone. Brock felt
that the support of Constance was of greater value than that of Edith at
any stage or in any emergency.
Besides, he was now quite palpably in love with her! "I've got it bad!"
he reflected in sober consideration of his plight. "But," came the
ironic justification, "I'm able to confine it to the immediate family.
That's more than most husbands can say."
The Rodneys descended upon the Bristol at five o'clock, rushing down
from the Nord-Bahnhof as if there was not a minute to spare. Constance
pursued Katherine to her room, where they revelled in the delights of a
reunion, gradually coming out of its throes as the hour for dressing
approached.
"We dine early, dear," said Constance, "with supper after the opera. I
must be off to dress."
"I am so eager to meet Mr. Medcroft. Is he nice?"
"He's the dearest thing in the world," cried the other, her cheeks
aglow.
"I'm so glad, on Edith's account. Most of these English matches turn out
abominably," commented Miss Rodney, who was twenty, very pretty, and
very worldly. "Oh, did I tell you that Freddie Ulstervelt is with us?"
"No!"
"We came across him in Berlin, and dad asked him to join us, if he had
nothing better to do, so he said he would. He was with us in Dresden and
Prague and--don't you think he's awfully jolly?"
"Ripping!" said Constance with deplorable fervour.
"How awfully English! He said he'd seen you in Paris this spring."
"Yes," said Miss Fowler, her cheeks going red suddenly. "I told him
you'd asked me to be with you in June." She could have cut out her
tongue for saying this, but it was too late. Katherine laughed a trifle
hardly after a stiff moment; then a queer light flitted into her
eyes,--the light of awakened opposition. Constance was saying to
herself, "She's in love with Freddie. I might have known it." Back in
her brain lay the memory of Freddie's violent protestations of love,
uttered during those recent days in Paris. He had threatened to throw
himself into the Seine; she remembered that quite well--and also the
fact that he did nothing of the sort, but had a very jolly time at
Maxim's and sent her flowers by way of repentance. Knowing Freddie so
well, it would not have surprised her in the least to find that he had
become engaged to Katherine. His heart was a very flexible organ.
[Illustration: Katherine]
"Oh," said Katherine, "I believe he did say that you had mentioned us."
Of herself she was asking: "I wonder if she is in love with him!"
And thus it transpired that Freddie Ulstervelt--addlepated,
good-looking, inconstant Freddie, just out of college--was transformed
into a bone of contention, whether he would or no.
He was of the kind who love or make love to every new girl they meet,
seriously enough at the time, but easily passed over if need be. Rebuffs
may have puzzled him, but they left no jagged scar. He belonged to that
class which upsets the tranquillity of inexperienced maidens by
whispering intensely, "God, it's grand!" And he means it at the moment.
Katherine Rodney was in love with him. He belonged to a fashionable New
York family of wealth, and he had been a young lion at Pasadena during
the winter just past. He owned automobiles and a yacht and--an extensive
wardrobe. These notable assets had much to do with the conquest of Mrs.
Rodney: she looked with favour upon the transitory Mr. Ulstervelt, and
believed in her heart that he had something to do with the location of
the shining sun. But of this affair more anon, as the novelists say.
Brock was presented to the Rodneys just before the party went in to
dinner. He managed his eyeglass and his drawl bravely, and got on
swimmingly with the elder Rodneys, until Constance appeared with
Katherine and Freddie Ulstervelt. It was not until then that it occurred
to Miss Fowler that Freddie, being from New York, was almost certain to
know Brock either personally or by sight. She experienced a cold chill,
the distinct approach of catastrophe. Brock had just been told that
young Ulstervelt of New York was to be of the party. His blood ran cold.
He had never seen the young man, but he knew his father well; he had
even dined at the mansion in Madison Avenue. There was every reason,
however, to suspect that Freddie knew him by sight. Even as he was
planning a mode of defence in case of recognition, the young man was
presented. Brock's drawl was something wonderful.
"I--aw--knew your family, I'm sure--aw, quite sure," he said. "You know,
of course, that I lived in your--aw--delightful city for some years.
Strange we never met, 'pon my soul."
"Oh, New York's a pretty big place, Mr. Medcroft," said Freddie
good-naturedly. He was a slight young fellow with a fresh, inquisitive
face. "It's bigger than London in some ways. It's bigger upwards. Say,
do you know, you remind me of a fellow I knew in New York!"
"Haw, haw!" laughed Brock, without grace or reason. Miss Fowler caught
her breath sharply.
"Fellow named Brock. Stupid sort of chap, my mother says. I--"
"Oh, dear me, Mr. Ulstervelt," cried Edith, breaking in, "you shan't say
anything mean about Mr. Brock. He's my husband's best friend."
"I didn't say it, Mrs. Medcroft. It was my mother." Brock was hiding a
smile behind his hand. "She knows him better than I. To tell the truth,
I've never met him, but I've seen him on the Fifth Avenue stages. You
_do_ look like him, though, by Jove."
"It's extraordinary how many people think I look like dear old Brock,"
said the false Roxbury. "But, on the other hand, most people think that
Brock looks like me, so what's the odds? Haw, haw! Ripping! Eh, Mr.
Rodney?"
"Ripping? Ripping what? Good God, am I ripping anything?" gasped Mr.
Rodney, who was fussy and fat and generally futile. He seemed to grow
suddenly uncomfortable, as if ripping was a habit with him.
Dinner was a success. Brock shone with a refulgence that bedimmed all
expectations. His wife was delighted; in all of the four years of
married life, Roxbury had never been so brilliant, so deliciously
English (to use her own expression). Constance tingled with pride. Of
late, she had experienced unusual difficulty in diverting her gaze from
the handsome impostor, and her thoughts were ever of him--in
justification of a platonic interest, of course, no more than that.
To-night her eyes and thoughts were for him alone,--a circumstance
which, could he have felt sure, would have made him wildly happy,
instead of inordinately furious in his complete misunderstanding of her
manner toward Freddie Ulstervelt, who had no compunction about making
love to two girls at the same time. She was never so beautiful, never so
vivacious, never so resourceful. Brock was under the spell; he was
fascinated; he had to look to himself carefully in order to keep his
wits in the prescribed channel.
His self-esteem received a severe shock at the opera. Mrs. Medcroft,
with malice aforethought, insisted that Ulstervelt should take her
husband's seat. As the box held but six persons, the unfortunate Brock
was compelled to shift more or less for himself. Inwardly raging, he
suavely assured the party--Freddie in particular--that he would find a
seat in the body of the house and would join them during the
_Entr'acte_. Then he went out and sat in the foyer. It was fortunate
that he hated Wagner. Before the end of the act he was joined by Mr.
Rodney, horribly bored and eager for relief. In a near-by _café_ they
had a whiskey and soda apiece, and, feeling comfortably reinforced,
returned to the opera house arm-in-arm, long and short, thin and fat,
liberally discoursing upon the intellectuality of Herr Wagner.
"Say, you're not at all like an Englishman," exclaimed Mr. Rodney
impulsively, even gratefully.
"Eh, what?" gasped Brock, replacing his eyeglass. "Oh, I say, now, 'pon
my word, haw, haw!"
"You've got an American sense of humour, Medcroft, that's what you have.
You recognise the joke that Wagner played on the world. Pardon me for
saying it, sir, but I didn't think it was in an Englishman."
"Haw, haw! Ripping, by Jove! No, no! Not you. I mean the joke. But then,
you see, it's been so long since Wagner played it that even an
Englishman has had time to see the point. Besides, I've lived a bit of
my life in America."
"That accounts for it," said the tactless but sincere Mr. Rodney.
Brock glared so venomously at the intrusive Mr. Ulstervelt upon the
occasion of his next visit to his own box, that Mrs. Medcroft smiled
softly to herself as she turned her face away. A few minutes later she
seized the opportunity to whisper in his ear. Her eyes were sparkling,
and something in her manner bespoke the bated breath.
"You are in love with my sister," was what she said to him. He blushed
convincingly.
"Nonsense!" he managed to reply, but without much persuasiveness.
"But you are. I'm not blind. Anyone can see it. _She_ sees it. Haven't
you sense enough to hide it from her? How do you expect to win?"
"My dear Mrs.--my dear Edith, you amaze me. I'm confusion itself. But,"
he went on eagerly, illogically, "do you think I _could_ win her?"
"That is not for one's wife to say," she said demurely.
"I'd be tremendously proud of you as a sister-in-law. And I'd be much
obliged if you'd help me. But look at that confounded Ulstervelt! He's
making love to her with the whole house looking on."
"I think it might be polite if you were to ask him out for a drink," she
suggested.
"But I've had one and I never take two."
"Model husband! Then take the girls into the foyer for a stroll and a
chat after the act. Don't mind me. I'm your friend."
"Do you think I've got a chance with her?" he asked with a brave effort.
"You've had one wife thrust upon you; why should you expect another
without a struggle? I'm afraid you'll have to work for Constance."
"But I have your--I can count on your approval?" he whispered eagerly.
"Don't, Roxbury! People will think you are making love to _me_!" she
protested, wilfully ignoring his question.
He returned to the box after the second act and proposed a turn in the
foyer. To his disgust, Ulstervelt appropriated Constance and left him
to follow with Mrs. Rodney and Katherine. He almost hated Edith for the
tantalising smile she shot after him as he moved away, defeated.
If he was glaring luridly at the irrepressible Freddie, he was not alone
in his gloom. Katherine Rodney, green with jealousy, was sending
spiteful glances after her dearest friend, while Mrs. Rodney was
sniffing the air as if it was laden with frost.
"Don't you think Connie is a perfect dear? I'm so fond of her," said
Miss Rodney, so sweetly that he should have detected the nether-flow.
He started and pulled himself together. "Aw, yes,--ripping!" He
consciously adjusted his eyeglass for a hasty glance about in search of
the easily disturbed Mr. Rodney. Then, to Mrs. Rodney, his mind a blank
after a passing glimpse of Constance and her escort: "Aw--er--a
perfectly jolly opera, isn't it?"