BELOW STAIRS.
While matters were moving on thus excitedly above stairs there was an
unusual commotion in the lower regions, effected by the machinations and
deceptions of that arch-flirt, Dolf. He had succeeded in accomplishing
what no sable gallant had ever done before; he had softened Clorinda's
obdurate heart, and made her think it possible that at some future time
she might be persuaded to place her fair self, and what she prized more,
her money, in Dolf's keeping.
But the worst of it was, Dolf's susceptible fancy led him strongly in
another direction, even while his discretion warned him to follow up the
success he had achieved with the culinary nymph. Victoria was a stylish,
handsome young mulatto, and Clorinda was, undoubtedly, pure African to
the very root of her genealogical tree. African from the soul of her
broad foot to the end, I cannot say point, of her flat nose. Indeed, it
is quite possible that Dolf's yellow skin went for something in her
admiration; but unfortunately Dolf preferred the café-au-lait complexion
also, and had a masculine weakness in favor of youth and good looks.
Poor Clorinda certainly did present a rather dry and withered aspect;
her hands bore rough evidence of the toil with which she had earned the
money her sable lover coveted, and their clasp was very unsatisfactory
to a man whose flirtations had hitherto been with ladies' maids. She was
sadly destitute of the airs and graces with which Victoria fascinated
the grand sex so freely upon all occasions; Clo's curly tresses held
quantities of whiteness, and she could only hide it under gorgeous
bandannas, which were now wofully out of fashion among the colored
aristocrats, and gaze enviously at Victoria's long curls, feeling her
fingers quiver to give them a pull when that damsel fluttered them too
jauntily in her eyes.
There had always been trouble enough between the two, but after Dolf's
arrival the kitchen department grew very hot and uncomfortable, and even
the wary Dolf himself, skilled as he was in Lotharian practices,
frequently had great difficulty in steering clear of both Scylla and
Charybdis.
Clorinda was much given to devotional exercises, and went to meeting on
every possible occasion; while Victoria, with the flightiness of her
years, laughed at Clo's psalm-singing, and interrupted her prayers in
the most fervid part by polka steps and profane redowas. In order to
propitiate Clorinda, Dolf had accompanied her to meeting much oftener
than his inclinations prompted, expressing the utmost desire to be
remembered in her prayers, all the while denouncing himself as a
miserable sinner not worth saving.
But good women with a weakness for helping masculine sinners are alike
in one thing, no matter what their color may be--wickedness has a
strange attraction for them. It was the peril in which she considered
Dolf, that made Clo so lenient towards him; it would be such a triumph
to win him from his wicked ways, and lead him up to a height where he
would be secure from the craft of the evil one, and what was more
important, beyond the wiles of that yellow girl Victoria, who was
regarded by her fellow-servants as a direct emissary of the prince of
darkness.
Clo labored faithfully with 'Dolf, though it must be confessed she
allowed her religious instructions to be diversified with a little more
love-making than would have been quite sanctioned by her class leader,
and for the first time in her life became extravagant in the matter of
dress, wearing the most gorgeous bandannas every day, and even adopting
an immense crinoline, which she managed so badly that it was constantly
bringing her into grotesque difficulties, to Victoria's intense delight.
Of course these females, like their betters, never quarreled openly
about Dolf, but they found endless subjects of dispute to improve upon,
and sometimes that adroit fellow got into serious difficulty with both
by attempting to mediate between them.
On occasions the sable rivals would hide their bitterness under smiles
and good nature, and appear almost affectionate after the influence of a
sudden truce; but Dolf learned to dread those seasons of deceitful calm,
for they were the sure precursors of an unusually fierce tempest, which,
blowing in opposite directions, it was impossible for him to escape.
These three restless persons went out one evening to pay a visit to some
sable friends in the neighborhood, where the colored gentry often met
and had choice little entertainments; where the eatables came from
perhaps it would not have been wise for their employers to inquire.
Old Mrs. Hopkins and her fascinating daughter, Miss Dinah, were the
possessors of this abode, and Clo and Victoria had for some time been
promising Dolf a visit there. That night seemed a favorable occasion for
the expedition, as a store of fruit pies, blanc mange and chicken salad,
had that day been moulded by Clo's own expert hands, and half a jelly
cake set aside in the closet ready for the basket which took so many
mysterious journeys in Mrs. Hopkins' direction.
"I nebber sends back pieces to de table," said Clo; "it's wulgar."
"In course it is," returned Dolf; "I'se sure nothing would orritate
master more."
Vic attempted no deceptions on her conscience; she liked jelly cake, and
did not trouble herself about the manner in which it was obtained; since
her earliest remembrance stolen delicacies had never given her a
moment's indigestion, or the least approach to moral nightmare.
They went over to visit Mrs. Hopkins and Miss Dinah, and the evening was
made a festive one, with Clo's pies, the hard cider which Mrs. Hopkins
provided, and other delicacies which composed a sumptuous entertainment.
But as ill-luck would have it, two or three other friends strayed in,
and among them was a young woman as much given to coquetry as Dolf
himself; and before a great while Dolf's love of flirtation got the
better of his prudence, and plentiful doses of the hard cider rendered
him reckless. In spite of the indignation which both Clo and Victoria
displayed, he was exerting all his fascinations on the newcomer, while
her neglected beau sat looking like a modern Othello, with every glance
expressive of bowie-knives at least.
When the damsel went out with Miss Dinah, for an extra bench from the
wash-house, Dolf accompanied them, and directly the company were
startled by a direful commingling of laughter and doleful shrieks.
Clo flew to the door and opened it; Victoria peeped over her shoulder;
there was that perfidious Dolf encircling the stranger damsel with his
right arm, and making bold efforts to lay hold of the wash-bench with
his left.
Dolf looked up and saw Clo; he was not so much under the excitement of
the cider that he could not understand the risk he ran.
"Dare is pretty conducts!" exclaimed Clo.
"I shud tink so," chimed in Victoria. "If you please, Miss Clorinda, I
tink I will locomote home; I ain't accustomed to sich goings on myself;
dey isn't de fashion in de Piney Cove basement."
Clorinda got her bonnet and tied it on her head with an indignant jerk.
The outraged damsels would hear no persuasions, and Dolf was forced to
accompany them back, and a very uncomfortable time he had of it.
First they abused the impudent young pusson they had left behind, and
nearly annihilated Dolf when he attempted a word in the young woman's
favor.
"I 'clar," cried Clo at last; "Mr. Dolf, yer go 'long as crooked as a
rail fence; what am de matter, are yer jest done gone and no 'count
nigger any how?"
Dolf only gave a racy chuckle.
"I guess goin' into the wash-room turned his head," said Vic.
"De siety I'se enjoyin' at dis minit," said deceitful Dolf, "is enough
to turn de head of any gemman."
"Oh, we know all 'bout dat," said Vic.
"In course you does," returned Dolf, forgetting Clorinda, and trying to
seize Vic's hand, but so uncertain were his movements that she readily
escaped him.
Clorinda saw it all; it was fuel to the flame which consumed her.
"Miss Victory," said she, "yer needn't push me into de brook."
"Who's a pushin' of yer?" retorted Victoria, with equal acidity.
"Yer was, yer own self."
"I didn't--so dar! Guess somethin' ails yer head too, de way yer go
on--pushin' indeed."
"I scorns yer insinivations," said Clorinda, "and despises yer
actuations!"
"Jis' don't go pitchin' into me and callin' me names," retorted Vic;
"'cause I won't stand it."
"Ladies, ladies!" interposed Dolf. "Don't resturb de harmonium of our
walk by any onpleasant words."
"I ain't a sayin' nothin'," said Vic.
"Yer've said more'n I," returned Clo, "and I ain't gwine to be pushed
inter de ditch by nobody--thar!"
Clorinda was naturally more irritated than Vic, because Dolf had made no
effort to seize upon her hand, which trembled to give him a pardoning
clasp.
"Nobody wants ter push yer," said Vic.
"I don' know 'bout dat," said Clo, solemnly; "I b'lieve if I was
murdered in my bed I shud know whar ter look for de murderer."
"Sich subjects, Miss Clorinda, is not fit for yer lubly lips," said
Dolf; "don' gib dem houseroom, I begs."
"Mr. Dolf," returned Clorinda, with a severity that pierced like a
warning through the elation of Lothario's brain; "don' try none ob dem
flightinesses wid me; I ain't one ob dat sort."
"What sort?" asked Victoria.
"Neber yer mind," said Clo, with majesty; "neber yer mind, miss;
children don' comprehensianise sich like."
"I onderstands Miss Clorinda, and I venerates her sentimens," observed
Dolf; "but when a gemman finds hisself in sich siety as dis, de language
of compliments flows as naturally ter his lips as--as--cider from a junk
bottle."
This well-rounded period softened both the damsels a little; Dolf got
Clo on his right arm and Vic on his left; the support was not unwelcome
to himself just then; and he managed to keep them both in tolerable
humor until they nearly reached the house.
Whether Dolf stumbled, or Victoria gave a sly, vicious push, it was
difficult to tell in the darkness, but Clorinda went suddenly down full
length in the path.
Victoria gave a laugh of derision, and this gratification of her
malicious feelings in the misfortune of her rival, put her in high
good-humor.
Dolf hastened to help Clorinda up, but his movements were a little
uncertain, and the first thing he did was to set his foot through the
crown of her bonnet, which had fallen back from her head.
"I'se killed," shrieked Clo.
"Do scream low, like a 'spectable ole woman!" cried the unsympathising
Vic; "yer'll hab de whole house out."
"I don't keer," moaned Clorinda: "I don't keer."
"Why don' yer get up?" demanded Victoria.
"I'll 'sist yer, I'll 'sist yer," said Dolf, making another sidelong
movement.
Clorinda endeavored to help herself, but the effort was a failure, and
there she lay covered with confusion, for she could not think of giving
the real cause of her continued prostration. The truth was she had
knocked one high heel from a pair of Mrs. Harrington's French boots,
which that lady was not likely to miss before morning; and had sprained
her ankle in the process, a very unpleasant situation for a modest and
churchgoing darkey to find herself in, late at night, and her lover
looking on.
"Be yer gwine to lay dar all night!" asked Vic.
"I kin't get up, I tell yer," said Clo.
"Is yer bones broke?"
"Smashed. One of 'em am smashed," answered Clo, ruefully.
"No, no; Miss Clory, not as bad as dat," said Dolf; "don't petrificate
us wid sich a idee. Jis let me sist yer now."
"No, no," cried Clorinda; "wait a minit--my foot--my foot!"
"Hev yer hurt it?" demanded Vic; "let me zamine."
"It's my ankle; can't yer understand?"
"No, I kin't onderstand nothin' 'bout it, only yer makin' a outrageous
ole fool o' yerself, and freezin' us to death. Mr. Dolf, 'spozen we go
in."
"Yer wouldn't desart a sister in distress," said Dolf, dancing about the
prostrate form, unable to comprehend why Clo would not permit him to
assist her; while she huddled herself in a heap, in true spinster fear
of showing her ankles or exposing the borrowed boot.
"Now, Clo," cried Victoria, "jis git up; I won't stand dis fooling no
longer."
"Help me," said Clo; "do help me."
"Hain't Mr. Dolf ben a tryin' dese ten minits!"
"No, no! Bend down here, Vic. Mr. Dolf, if yer's a gemman I ax yer to
shut yer eyes."
"My duty is to sarve de fair," said Dolf, turning his back and peeping
over his shoulder, very curious to know what could be the difficulty.
Clo whispered in Victoria's ear with agonised sharpness,
"Dem boots am so high, an' my ankle is guv out, jes ondo de buttons!"
A stone might have sympathised with her maidenly distress, but that
wicked Victoria burst into absolute shrieks of laughter.
"Oh, oh, oh! yer ole fool!" she cried, between her shouts of merriment.
"Yer too ole for new fashions--telled yer so!"
Clorinda's outraged modesty was forgotten in the fury which Victoria's
lack of sympathy caused.
"Jis let me git up!" cried she. "I'll fix yer; I'll frizzle dem long
beaucatchers like a door mat, an' stamp on 'em."
"What am it?" demanded Dolf.
As well as she could speak for laughing, Victoria began "She's just
choked up her foot in Miss Harrington's high pinercled boots!"
"Hush up!" interrupted Clo. "I'll pisen yer if yer don't shut yer
impudent mouth."
"Ki! ki! ki! oh, laws, I shall die! Ole folks hadn't orter try to be
young uns. I've telled yer so, Clo, fifty times," shrieked the yellow
maiden; "'tain't no wonder yer snickered, Dolf; borrered feathers! he,
he! Vic!"
Clorinda sprang to her feet with a yell of triumph and rage, and limping
toward Victoria, caught that yellow maiden by her much-prized tresses,
and for a few moments the battle between the rivals raged furiously.
Clo quite forgot her religion in the excitement, and her language might
have shocked the elders had they heard it, while Victoria struggled
bravely to save her tresses from extermination.
"De hall door's a openin'," cried Dolf, struck with a brilliant thought;
"I believe it's marster comin' out."
The battle ceased. Dolf ran towards the house and the combatants after
him; Clorinda limping like a returned soldier, but Dolf never stopped
till he was safe in his own dormitory, not caring to trust himself in
the presence of either of the infuriated damsels.
Indeed, the next morning it required the special interference of Mrs.
Mellen herself to settle the matter, and several days passed before
perfect harmony was restored in the lower regions at Piney Cove.