He is one whose hopes commonly exceed his fortunes and whose mind soars
above his purse. If he hath read Tacitus Guicciardine or Gallo-Belgicus,
he condemns the late Lord-Treasurer for all the state policy he had, and
laughs to think what a fool he could make of Solomon if he were now
alive. He never wears new clothes but against a commencement or a good
time, and is commonly a degree behind the fashion. He hath sworn to see
London once a year, though all his business be to see a play, walk a
turn in Paul's, and observe the fashion. He thinks it a discredit to be
out of debt, which he never likely clears without resignation money. He
will not leave his part he hath in the privilege over young gentlemen in
going bare to him, for the empire of Germany. He prays as heartily for a
sealing as a cormorant doth for a dear year, yet commonly he spends that
revenue before he receives it.
At meals he sits in as great state over his penny commons as ever
Vitellius did at his greatest banquet, and takes great delight in
comparing his fare to my Lord Mayor's.
If he be a leader of a faction, he thinks himself greater than ever
Caesar was or the Turk at this day is. And he had rather lose an
inheritance than an office when he stands for it.
If he be to travel, he is longer furnishing himself for a five miles'
journey than a ship is rigging for a seven years' voyage. He is never
more troubled than when he has to maintain talk with a gentlewoman,
wherein he commits more absurdities than a clown in eating of an egg.
He thinks himself as fine when he is in a clean band and a new pair of
shoes, as any courtier doth when he is first in a new fashion.
Lastly, he is one that respects no man in the university, and is
respected by no man out of it.