CHREMES, MYSIS, DAVUS.
_Chremes._ (_to himself._) Well, having prepared every thing for the
marriage of my daughter, I am returned to inform them that they may now
send for her. But what do I see? by Hercules, ’tis a child! Woman, did
you lay it there?
_Mysis._ Where can Davus be?
_Chremes._ Why don’t you answer me?
_Mysis._ (_aside._) Ah! he is not here. Mercy on me, the fellow has
left me here, and gone away.
_Davus._ (_speaking loud, and pretending not to see Chremes._) Heavens!
what a crowd there is in the Forum! what a wrangling! provisions too
are very dear. (_Aside._) What else to say I know not.
_Mysis._ (_aside to Davus._) In Heaven’s name, how could you think of
leaving me here alone?
_Davus._ (_aloud._) Ha! what plot is this? Mysis, whose child is this?
who brought it here?
_Mysis._ (_aside to Davus._) Are you mad to ask me such a question?
_Davus._ Whom should I ask? I can see no one else here[175].
_Chremes._ (_aside._) I wonder whose child it is!
_Davus._ Will you answer me or not?
_Mysis._ Ah!
_Davus._ (_aside to Mysis._) Move to the right.
_Mysis._ Are you mad? was it not yourself?
_Davus._ (_aside to Mysis._) Take care not to say a single syllable,
except exact answers to the questions I put to you.
_Mysis._ Do you threaten me?
_Davus._ Whose child is it? (_Aside to Mysis._) Speak.
_Mysis._ From our house.
_Davus._ Ha! ha! this woman’s impudence is wonderful!
_Chremes._ (_aside._) This girl belongs to the Andrian, I am pretty
sure.
_Davus._ Do we seem so fit to be imposed upon?
_Chremes._ (_aside._) I came just in time.
_Davus._ (_quite loud._) Make haste, and take the brat from our door.
(_Aside to Mysis._) Don’t stir a step.
_Mysis._ The deuce [176]take you, fellow, for terrifying me in this
manner.
_Davus._ Do you hear me or not?
_Mysis._ What do you want?
_Davus._ What! must I tell you again! whose child have you brought
here? Answer me.
_Mysis._ You know well enough whose child it is.
_Davus._ Never mind what I know: tell me what I ask.
_Mysis._ It belongs to your family.
_Davus._ To our family! but to which of us?
_Mysis._ To Pamphilus.
_Davus._ Hey! what? to Pamphilus? (_very loud._)
_Mysis._ Yes, can you deny it?
_Chremes._ (_aside._) I acted wisely in avoiding the match[177].
_Davus._ What a disgraceful trick! it ought to be publicly exposed.
_Mysis._ What are you making so much noise about?
_Davus._ What did I see brought to your house yesterday?
_Mysis._ O! impudent fellow!
_Davus._ ’Tis true: I saw old Canthara, with something under her
cloak[178].
_Mysis._ Thank Heaven, that there were some free women present when my
mistress was delivered[179ᴬ].
_Davus._ She knows little of the man she wants to practise these tricks
upon: do you think that if Chremes saw this child before our door, he
would refuse us his daughter on that account? I say he would give her
more willingly.
_Chremes._ (_aside._) Not he, indeed.
_Davus._ And, to be short with you, that you may understand me at once,
if you don’t take away the child instantly, I’ll roll him into the
middle of the street, and you, Madam, into the kennel.
_Mysis._ [179ᴮ]By Pollux, fellow, you are drunk.
_Davus._ One falsehood brings on another: [180]I hear it whispered
about, that she is a citizen of Athens.
_Chremes._ (_aside._) How!
_Davus._ And that he will be compelled to marry her[181].
_Mysis._ What then, pray, is she not a citizen?
_Chremes._ (_aside._) By Jupiter, I have narrowly escaped making myself
a common laughing-stock to all the town.
_Davus._ (_turning round suddenly._) Who speaks there? Oh Chremes! you
are come just in time: listen――――
_Chremes._ I have heard every thing.
_Davus._ What, Sir, heard all, did you say?
_Chremes._ I tell you, I heard all from the beginning.
_Davus._ (_half aloud._) He has heard all: what an [182]accident!――this
impudent wench ought to be taken hence and punished[183]: (_to Mysis._)
This is Chremes himself: think not that you can impose upon Davus.
_Mysis._ Alas! dear Sir, indeed I have said nothing but the truth.
_Chremes._ I know every thing. Is Simo at home?
_Davus._ Yes, Sir.
[_Exit Chremes._