(From Chattanooga Times.)
$10 REWARD. Black mare stolen. Return to W. W. Bell, Tyner, Tenn. Small
wart in ear, tail chewed off at hocks; mane lays on both sides of neck;
slightly reel-footed in two feet, one front, one hind; $25 if thief is
with horse.
* * * * *
Mother (to battered son)—George, how many times have I told you to stop
and count to a hundred before fighting?
George—That’s what I did, Ma, but the other kid’s mother told him to
count only ten.
* * * * *
Quick, Officer, He’s Bleedin’!
Why is a woman like an umbrella?
Because she is made of ribs and attached to a stick.
No, have another guess.
Because nobody ever gets the right one.
Wrong, swing at it again.
Because she fades with age.
Almost, pull another.
Because she is a good thing to have about the house.
Rotten. Here’s the answer: A woman is like an umbrella because she is
used to “reign.”
* * * * *