CHAPTER XIII.

A SERMON TO HELEN.

All the rest of the week his mind was full of thoughts like these,

amid which ever arose the suffering face of Helen Lingard, bringing

with it the still strengthening suspicion that behind it must lie

some oppressive, perhaps terrible secret. But he made no slightest

movement towards the discovery of it, put not a single question in

any direction for its confirmation or dissolution. He would not look

in at her windows, but what seeds of comfort he could find, he would

scatter wide, and hope that some of them might fall into her garden.

When he raised his head on the Sunday from kneeling, with heart

honest, devout, and neighbourly, in the pulpit before the sermon,

and cast his eyes round his congregation, they rested first, for one

moment and no more, upon the same pallid and troubled countenance

whose reflection had so often of late looked out from the magic

mirror of his memory; the next, they flitted across the satisfied,

healthy, handsome, clever face of her cousin, behind which plainly

sat a conscience well-to-do, in an easy chair; the third, they saw

and fled the peevish autumnal visage of Mrs. Ramshorn; the next,

they roved a little, then rested on the draper's good-humoured disc,

on the white forehead of which brooded a cloud of thoughtfulness.

Last of all they sought the free seats, and found the faces of both

the dwarfs. It was the first time he had seen Rachel's there, and it

struck him that it expressed greater suffering than he had read in

it before. She ought rather to be in bed than in church, he thought.

But the same seemed the case with her uncle's countenance also; and

with that came the conclusion that the pulpit was a wonderful

watch-tower whence to study human nature; that people lay bare more

of their real nature and condition to the man in the pulpit than

they know--even before the sermon. Their faces have fallen into the

shape of their minds, for the church has an isolating as well as

congregating power, and no passing emotion moulds them to an

evanescent show. When Polwarth spoke to a friend, the suffering

melted in issuing radiance; when he sat thus quiescent, patient

endurance was the first thing to be read on his countenance. This

flashed through the curate's mind in the moments ere he began to

speak, and with it came afresh the feeling--one that is, yet ought

not to be sad--that no one of all these hearts could give

summer-weather to another. The tears rose in his eyes as he gazed,

and his heart swelled towards his own flesh and blood, as if his

spirit would break forth in a torrent of ministering tenderness and

comfort. Then he made haste to speak lest he should become unable.

As usual his voice trembled at first, but rose into strength as his

earnestness found way. This is a good deal like what he said:

"The marvellous man who is reported to have appeared in Palestine,

teaching and preaching, seems to have suffered far more from

sympathy with the inward sorrows of his race than from pity for

their bodily pains. These last, could he not have swept from the

earth with a word? and yet it seems to have been mostly, if not

indeed always, only in answer to prayer that he healed them, and

that for the sake of some deeper, some spiritual healing that should

go with the bodily cure. It could not be for the dead man whom he

was about to call from the tomb, that his tears flowed. What source

could they have but compassion and pitiful sympathy for the sorrows

of the dead man's sisters and friends who had not the inward joy

that sustained himself, and the thought of all the pains and

heartaches of those that looked in the face of death--the meanings

of love--torn generations, the blackness of bereavement that had

stormed through the ever changing world of human hearts since first

man had been made in the image of his Father? Yet are there far more

terrible troubles than this death--which I trust can only part, not

keep apart. There is the weight of conscious wrong being and wrong

doing--that is the gravestone that needs to be rolled away ere a man

can rise to life. Call to mind how Jesus used to forgive men's sins,

thus lifting from their hearts the crushing load that paralyzed all

their efforts. Recall the tenderness with which he received those

from whom the religious of his day turned aside--the repentant women

who wept sore-hearted from very love, the publicans who knew they

were despised because they were despicable. With him they sought and

found shelter. He was their saviour from the storm of human judgment

and the biting frost of public opinion, even when that opinion and

that judgment were re-echoed by the justice of their own hearts. He

received them, and the life within them rose up, and the light

shone--the conscious light of light, despite even of shame and

self-reproach. If God be for us who can be against us? In his name

they rose from the hell of their own hearts' condemnation, and went

forth to do the truth in strength and hope. They heard and believed

and obeyed his words. And of all words that ever were spoken, were

ever words gentler, tenderer, humbler, lovelier--if true, or more

arrogant, man-degrading, God-defying--if false, than these,

concerning which, as his, I now desire to speak to you: 'Come unto

me, all ye that labour and are heavy-laden, and I will give you

rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and

lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke

is easy, and my burden is light'?

"Surely these words, could they but be heartily believed, are such

as every human heart might gladly hear! What man is there who has

not had, has not now, or will not have to class himself amongst the

weary and heavy-laden? Ye who call yourselves Christians profess to

believe such rest is to be had, yet how many of you go bowed to the

very earth, and take no single step towards him who says Come, lift

not an eye to see whether a face of mercy may not be looking down

upon you! Is it that, after all, you do not believe there ever was

such a man as they call Jesus? That can hardly be. There are few so

ignorant, or so wilfully illogical as to be able to disbelieve in

the existence of the man, or that he spoke words to this effect. Is

it then that you are doubtful concerning the whole import of his

appearance? In that case, were it but as a doubtful medicine, would

it not be well to make some trial of the offer made? If the man said

the words, he must have at least believed that he could fulfil them.

Who that knows anything of him at all can for a moment hold that

this man spoke what he did not believe? The best of the Jews who yet

do not believe in him, say of him that he was a good though mistaken

man. Will a man lie for the privilege of being despised and rejected

of men, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief? What but the

confidence of truth could have sustained him when he knew that even

those who loved him would have left him had they believed what he

told them of his coming fate?--But then: believing what he said,

might he not have been mistaken?--A man can hardly be mistaken as to

whether he is at peace or not--whether he has rest in his soul or

not. Neither I think can a man well be mistaken as to whence comes

the peace he possesses,--as to the well whence he draws his comfort.

The miser knows his comfort is his gold. Was Jesus likely to be

mistaken when he supposed himself to know that his comfort came from

his God? Anyhow he believed that his peace came from his

obedience--from his oneness with the will of his Father. Friends, if

I had such peace as was plainly his, should I not know well whence

it came?--But I think I hear some one say: 'Doubtless the good man

derived comfort from the thought of his Father, but might he not be

mistaken in supposing there was any Father?' Hear me, my friends: I

dare not say I know there is a Father. I dare not even say I think,

I can only say with my whole heart I hope we have indeed a Father in

heaven; but this man says HE KNOWS. Am I to say he does not know?

Can I, who know so much I would gladly have otherwise in myself,

imagine him less honest than I am? If he tells me he knows, I am

dumb and listen. One I KNOW: THERE IS--outweighs a whole creation of

voices crying each I KNOW NOT, THEREFORE THERE IS NOT. And observe

it is his own, his own best he wants to give them--no bribe to

obedience to his will, but the assurance of bliss if they will do as

he does. He wants them to have peace--HIS peace--peace from the same

source whence he has it. For what does he mean by TAKE MY YOKE UPON

YOU, AND LEARN OF ME? He does not mean WEAR THE YOKE I LAY UPON

YOU, AND OBEY MY WORDS. I do not say he might not have said so, or

that he does not say what comes to the same thing at other times,

but that is not what he says here--that is not the truth he would

convey in these words. He means TAKE UPON YOU THE YOKE I WEAR;

LEARN TO DO AS I DO, WHO SUBMIT EVERYTHING AND REFER EVERYTHING TO

THE WILL OF MY FATHER, YEA HAVE MY WILL ONLY IN THE CARRYING OUT OF

HIS: BE MEEK AND LOWLY IN HEART, AND YE SHALL FIND REST UNTO YOUR

SOULS. With all the grief of humanity in his heart, in the face of

the death that awaited him, he yet says, FOR MY YOKE, THE YOKE I

WEAR, IS EASY, THE BURDEN I BEAR IS LIGHT. What made that yoke

easy,--that burden light? That it was the will of the Father. If a

man answer: 'Any good man who believed in a God, might say as much,

and I do not see how it can help me;' my reply is, that this man

says, COME UNTO ME, AND I WILL GIVE YOU REST--asserting the power

to give perfect help to him that comes.--Does all this look far

away, my friends, and very unlike the things about us? The things

about you do not give you peace; from something different you may

hope to gain it. And do not our souls themselves fall out with their

surroundings, and cry for a nobler, better, more beautiful life?

"But some one will perhaps say: 'It is well; but were I meek and

lowly in heart as he of whom you speak, it could not touch MY

trouble: that springs not from myself, but from one I love.' I

answer, if the peace be the peace of the Son of man, it must reach

to every cause of unrest. And if thou hadst it, would it not then be

next door to thy friend? How shall he whom thou lovest receive it

the most readily--but through thee who lovest him? What if thy

faith should be the next step to his? Anyhow, if this peace be not

an all-reaching as well as a heart-filling peace; if it be not a

righteous and a lovely peace, and that in despite of all surrounding

and opposing troubles, then it is not the peace of God, for that

passeth all understanding:--so at least say they who profess to

know, and I desire to take them at their word. If thy trouble be a

trouble thy God cannot set right, then either thy God is not the

true God, or there is no true God, and the man who professed to

reveal him led the one perfect life in virtue of his faith in a

falsehood. Alas for poor men and women and their aching hearts!--If

it offend any of you that I speak of Jesus as THE MAN who professed

to reveal God, I answer, that the man I see, and he draws me as with

the strength of the adorable Truth; but if in him I should certainly

find the God for the lack of whose peace I and my brethren and

sisters pine, then were heaven itself too narrow to hold my

exultation, for in God himself alone could my joy find room.

"Come then, sore heart, and see whether his heart cannot heal thine.

He knows what sighs and tears are, and if he knew no sin in himself,

the more pitiful must it have been to him to behold the sighs and

tears that guilt wrung from the tortured hearts of his brethren and

sisters. Brothers, sisters, we MUST get rid of this misery of ours.

It is slaying us. It is turning the fair earth into a hell, and our

hearts into its fuel. There stands the man, who says he knows: take

him at his word. Go to him who says in the might of his eternal

tenderness and his human pity--COME UNTO ME, ALL YE THAT LABOUR AND

ARE HEAVY-LADEN, AND I WILL GIVE YOU REST. TAKE MY YOKE UPON YOU, AND

LEARN OF ME; FOR I AM MEEK AND LOWLY IN HEART: AND YE SHALL FIND

REST UNTO YOUR SOULS. FOR MY YOKE IS EASY AND MY BURDEN IS LIGHT."

Thomas Wingfold, Curate V2 · 第 13 / 34 章