Seekers after notoriety must often be at their wits' end for some new
sensation with which to advertise themselves. Mr. TWAIN, for instance,
having gone through Fenianism and France, seems to have collapsed for
the present; and here now comes Mr. WEMYSS JOBSON, who subsided into
oblivion years ago, but has just emerged again into the light of _The
Sun_. The efforts of both these gentlemen to keep themselves prominently
before the public, however, are very inadequate and feeble. They should
suffer more and be stronger. Let TRAIN do a bold stroke of business by
declaring himself the perpetrator of the latest mysterious murder, and
it might be the making of the exhumed JOBSON to revive a fossilized
memory, and confess himself to be the criminal who delivered the fatal
blow to the late Mr. WILLIAM PATTERSON.
* * * * *
True to his Colors.
A Bostonian visiting New York, not long since, and reading in the papers
that there was to be a celebration of Mass in an up-town church, decided
to remain over Sunday for it, thinking, Bostonially, that Mass meant
Massachusetts and nothing else.
* * * * *
SUITABLE INSCRIPTION FOR A BOATMAN'S RACE-PRIZE. "The noblest
Row-man of them all."
* * * * *
[Illustration: A NEW LEAF IN THE FAMILY HISTORY.
_Jack._ "NOW, I'LL BE PAPA, GOING TO FIX THE FURNACE."
_Sallie_. "OH, YES!--AND I'LL BE THE NEW NURSE, AND YOU MUST KISS ME
BEHIND THE CELLAR DOOR!"]
* * * * *
[Illustration: BEHIND THE TIMES.