No _Laws_ against _Flattery_.
_Flattery_ is undoubtedly one of the most Unmanly, and Pernicious Vices
under the Sun, either Publick or Private; and in One Word, the very
Pest of all Commonwealths and Families, wherever it is Entertained; and
yet, to the Scandal of Human Policy, even in the Best of Governments,
the World was I know not how many Thousand Years Old, before ever any
Provision was thought of for the Preventing or the Suppressing of
this _Epidemical Corruption_. _Apollo_ was the First that (out of his
Own Wisdom and Goodness) Erected a Court of Justice for the Tryal of
_Parasites_; appointing the Sharpest Satyrists of the Age for their
Judges; and Arming the Commissioners with full Power and Authority to
Hear and Determine all Causes of that Quality: The Offender to stand
Convict upon the Testimony of one single Witness; and Immediately
upon Conviction, to be carried away into the _Market-Place_, and
there _Chained to a Stake_, and _Flay’d Alive_. It was Observ’d, that
notwithstanding the Severity of this Inexorable Law, _Flattery_ was
still as Bold, Busie, and Barefac’d as Ever, from the very Palace to
the Cottage; and yet in a matter of Six Months time, not One Complaint
brought into the Court against it. Upon this Neglect, there were _Spies_
and _Informers_ set at work in all _Coffee-Houses_, and other Publick
Places, to Watch the Company, and give intelligence to the _Tribunal_ of
what was said or done there, that might be laid hold of. The very next
day there was a Courtier taken up, and an Accusation Exhibited against
him, for having given a Person of Eminent Quality, the Character of a Man
of Honour, Brains, Good Government, and Virtue, when the whole World
knew him to be no better then an Ignorant Mercenary Sot, that without any
regard to Honesty, Prudence, or Good Manners, Abandon’d himself Entirely
to his Lusts and Pleasures. The Prisoner both Confess’d and Justifi’d the
Fact at the same time, appealing to the Person most concern’d, whether
he had wrong’d him or not; who not only Acquitted the Man, but Reflected
most Desperately upon the Scandalous Practice of the Court it self, in
making that to be _Flattery_, which upon the whole Matter, was no other
then _Truth_ and _Justice_. The Commission was hereupon Discharg’d, for
they found it utterly Impracticable to punish a Fault that no Body would
either Acknowledge or Complain of.
The MORAL.
_’Tis nothing but Self-Love at Home, that Provokes and Invites Flattery
from Abroad: And the Disposition of One Man to Receive it, Encourages
Another to give it._