The _Kingdom_ of _Apes_.
Two Men took a Voyage together into the Kingdom of _Apes_; the one a
_Trimmer_, the other a _Plain Dealer_. They were taken into Custody,
and carried to the Prince of the Country, as he sat in State, and a
mighty Court about him. Well, says the King to the _Trimmer_, Look me
in the Face now, and say, What do you take me to be? A Great Emperor,
Undoubtedly, says the _Trimmer_. Well, says his Majesty once again,
and what d’ye take all these People about me for? Why Sir, says he, I
take them for your Majesties Nobility and Great Officers. The Prince
was wonderfully pleas’d with the Civility and Respect of the Man, and
Order’d him a Bushel of Pippins, as a singular Mark of his Royal Favour.
His Majesty after this, put the same Questions to the _Plain Dealer_,
who fell to computing with Himself, that if his Companion had gotten a
Reward for a damn’d Lye, certainly he should have twice as much for a
Plain Honest Truth; and so he told the King Bluntly, that he took him
for a very Extraordinary _Ape_, and all those People about him for his
_Trusty and Well-beloved Counsellors and Cozens_: But the Poor Man Paid
dearly for his Simplicity; for upon a Signal from the Emperor, the whole
Band of _Apes_ fell Tooth and Nail upon him, and tore him one Limb from
another.
The MORAL.
_Where the Rules and Measures of Policy are Perverted, there must needs
Ensue a Failure of Justice, and a Corruption of Manners: And in a Kingdom
of Apes, Buffons may well put in for Commission-Officers._