Very few persons acquit themselves nobly in their maiden speech. At a
wedding feast recently the bridegroom was called upon, as usual, to
respond to the given toast.
Blushing to the roots of his hair, he rose to his feet. He intended to
imply that he was unprepared for speechmaking, but, unfortunately, placed
his hand upon the bride's shoulder, and looked down at her as he stammered
out his opening (and concluding) words: "This--er--thing has been thrust
upon me."--_Tit-Bits._