(_A Caution to those who are Interviewed._)
The celebrity awaited his interviewer with some impatience. He had
arranged his story with considerable care. He was prepared to show
that he was the best of boys at school, the most studious of students
at the university, the worthiest of men at all times. He felt sure
that when the record of his life was published, preparations would be
made to erect a statue and a glass window in his honour. And so he was
satisfied.
In due course the interviewer appeared. The man was bland and
persuasive. He requested the celebrity to take a chair, and then
placed his hand upon his brow. The celebrity gazed into the eyes of
his visitor with a lack lustre stare, and then seemingly sank into a
heavy sleep.
"And now I am prepared to begin," murmured the interviewer, taking out
his notebook. "My worthy Sir, I command you to tell me all. Mark you
well--all." And then the celebrity, in a monotonous tone, revealed the
secrets of the past.
* * *
The celebrity was furious. The interview had appeared, and was far too
true in the story of its subject's life to be pleasant. There was no
assertion that the celebrity had been the best of boys at school, the
most studious of students at the university, the worthiest of men at
all times. On the contrary, the celebrity had "come out" in rather
unflattering colours. So that eminent man was simply furious. He
had sent for his interviewer, and awaited once more his arrival with
impatience. In due course his biographer turned up.
"And now, Sir," said the celebrity, in tones trembling with anger,
"what do you mean by suggesting that I tried as a child to slaughter
my maiden aunt?"
"Did you?" was the calm rejoinder.
"That is beside the question. And why did you assert that I had told
you that I never did a day's work at the university?"
"But you did say so--didn't you?"
"Again beside the question. And what did you mean by stating that
I had deserted my wife, and turned my children out-of-doors at a
moment's notice?"
"But were those statements true or untrue?"
"That you have not received a writ for libel is my answer. But how
came you to know these unpleasant details--who told you?"
"You did."
"I did! When, where and how?"
"When I saw you here, and at my request."
"I do not understand you," murmured the puzzled celebrity. "Why should
I tell you all this?"
Then came the explanation.
"You told me all I wanted," replied the interviewer, "because I am a
hypnotist?"
"Indeed!" returned the celebrity when he had recovered from his
astonishment; and then, after a moment of deep consideration, he gave
his visitor the names and addresses of the more hated of his rivals.
* * * * *