Before your time, two Mummers and a Unitarian were seated in a tavern
playing cards, when a long, sallow-faced man, dressed in black, joined
them and asked if he might have a game.
He was received cordially, and Whist was proposed, the civilisation of
the world not having arrived at Bridge at that time.
The Unitarian dealt out the cards, and the Man in black sorted and
scrutinized his hand in the manner of one who takes a keen interest in
the game.
‘By the way, what are trumps?’ he asked.
‘Hearts,’ replied one of the Mummers.
‘Hearts! Hearts! Red Hearts!’ screamed the Man in black, springing to
his feet and spilling his cards in anger. ‘How the myself can I play
with hearts as trumps! Any other suit would have done splendidly!’ And,
with a loud cry, he jumped through the floor, and as he went the others
caught a glimpse, through the crack, of flames, curling and leaping.
It is not recorded whether the Unitarian was the more surprised or the
two Mummers.