"There would be no departure from the most highly respectable
precedents in holding open-air sittings of the House of Commons,
while its advantages in the hot weather, as regards not only
physical comfort, but mental and moral fitness for the work of the
senator, are too obvious to need enumeration."
_Daily Paper._
SCENE--_The Grounds of the Crystal Palace. The House of Commons
assembled in the Rosary; Reporters (armed with speaking trumpets) in the
Band Stand and on branches of Trees._
_The Speaker (in his shirt-sleeves)._ Order, order! I must request
Members to abstain from touching the Fireworks till the evening.
_Dr. Tanner._ I rise to a point of order, Sir. What are we to do if it
rains? I see no preparation for rigging up an awning over us, and I must
protest against this cowardly attempt on the part of the Government to
stifle, or perhaps I ought to say drown, discussion, and----
_The Speaker (interposing)._ If the Hon. Member talks of rain before it
comes, I shall have to suspend him--ahem!--from the nearest tree.
(_Laughter._) The first Order of the Day is the Adjourned Discussion on
the London Local Government Bill.
_Sir W. Harcourt._ Before the discussion begins I should like to ask
your opinion, Sir, whether it is in order for the First Lord of the
Treasury to go off to the tobogganing slide instead of stopping to
answer questions? ("_Hear! hear!_")
_The Speaker._ The question is one of some difficulty. I have carefully
examined the precedents, but there is no mention of tobogganing in the
records of this House. I must therefore leave the matter to the good
sense and powers of self-restraint of Hon. and Right Hon. Members.
(_Cheers._)
_The Attorney-General (resuming the Debate on the London Government
Bill)._ A very much better idea of the different municipal districts
into which the Metropolis will be mapped out can be obtained by
ascending the great Water-Towers, and I therefore propose an adjournment
of half an hour for that purpose.
[_The Motion is agreed to without a Division. On the expiration of the
time an Hon. Member, who is indistinctly heard by the Reporters, is
understood to propose that the selling of lemonade at sixpence a glass,
without ice, to Members of Parliament constitutes a breach of the
Privileges of the House, but is ruled out of order._
_The Speaker._ I call on the ATTORNEY-GENERAL to resume his speech.
[_Ineffectual search, made all about the Rosary for the_
ATTORNEY-GENERAL.
_An Irish Member._ Try the Switch-Back Railway.
[_Laughter, and cries of "There isn't one!"_
Another Member thought that very probably the learned Gentleman had
looked in behind the scenes at the Open-air Ballet.
[_More Laughter._
The Member for the Tower Hamlets (resuming the discussion) proceeded to
dilate on the necessity of more communications being established between
the North and South banks of the River, in any scheme for Municipal
Reform, and alluding to the Tower Bridge erected in the grounds,
remarked that of course Members knew that in half-an-hour the time would
have arrived for it to be illuminated, and for the "Fire-Portraits of
Mr. PARNELL and all his followers" to be lighted (_general cheering_),
and he therefore moved, as a matter of urgent public importance, that
the House do now adjourn, especially as he had felt a few drops of rain,
and had forgotten to bring his umbrella.
_The Speaker._ Those who are in favour of adjournment say "Aye." (_No
response._) Those who are against it----why, bless me, there's nobody
left! Even the Sergeant-at-Arms has gone off to see the ballet! How
Unparliamentary! Surely those figures coming down the toboggan-slide
can't be Mr. GLADSTONE and Sir WILLIAM HARCOURT, racing Mr. SMITH and
the HOME SECRETARY? Why, I believe it is so. How exciting it looks!
Well, this adjourning at nine o'clock is much nicer, after all, than the
old late hours. Al fresco sittings rather a success. Feel rather
all-frisky myself. Think I'll go off and try a toboggan. [_Left
sliding._
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[Illustration: MR. PUNCH'S PARLIAMENTARY NAVAL REVIEW.
(_Fac-simile of Sketch made by Our Special Artist on the spot._)]
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