Direct your next to me at Bath; and remember me to all our
fellow-jesuits.
To Dr LEWIS.
HOT WELL, April 20.
I understand your hint. There are mysteries in physic, as well as in
religion; which we of the profane have no right to investigate--A
man must not presume to use his reason, unless he has studied the
categories, and can chop logic by mode and figure--Between friends, I
think every man of tolerable parts ought, at my time of day, to be both
physician and lawyer, as far as his own constitution and property are
concerned. For my own part, I have had an hospital these fourteen years
within myself, and studied my own case with the most painful attention;
consequently may be supposed to know something of the matter, although
I have not taken regular courses of physiology et cetera et cetera.--
In short, I have for some time been of opinion (no offence, dear Doctor)
that the sum of all your medical discoveries amounts to this, that the
more you study the less you know.--I have read all that has been written
on the Hot Wells, and what I can collect from the whole, is, that the
water contains nothing but a little salt, and calcarious earth, mixed in
such inconsiderable proportion, as can have very little, if any, effect
on the animal economy. This being the case, I think the man deserves to
be fitted with a cap and bells, who for such a paultry advantage as this
spring affords, sacrifices his precious time, which might be employed
in taking more effectual remedies, and exposes himself to the dirt, the
stench, the chilling blasts, and perpetual rains, that render this place
to me intolerable. If these waters, from a small degree of astringency,
are of some service in the diabetes, diarrhoea, and night sweats, when
the secretions are too much increased, must not they do harm in the same
proportion, where the humours are obstructed, as in the asthma,
scurvy, gout and dropsy?--Now we talk of the dropsy, here is a strange
fantastical oddity, one of your brethren, who harangues every day in
the Pump-room, as if he was hired to give lectures on all subjects
whatsoever--I know not what to make of him--Sometimes he makes
shrewd remarks; at other times he talks like the greatest simpleton in
nature--He has read a great deal; but without method or judgment, and
digested nothing. He believes every thing he has read; especially if
it has any thing of the marvellous in it and his conversation is a
surprizing hotch-potch of erudition and extravagance. He told me t’other
day, with great confidence, that my case was dropsical; or, as he called
it, leucophlegmatic: A sure sign, that his want of experience is equal
to his presumption--for, you know, there is nothing analogous to the
dropsy in my disorder--I wish those impertinent fellows, with their
ricketty understandings, would keep their advice for those that ask it.
Dropsy, indeed! Sure I have not lived to the age of fifty-five, and had
such experience of my own disorder, and consulted you and other eminent
physicians, so often, and so long, to be undeceived by such a--But,
without all doubt, the man is mad; and, therefore, what he says is of
no consequence. I had, yesterday, a visit from Higgins, who came hither
under the terror of your threats, and brought me in a present a brace of
hares, which he owned he took in my ground; and I could not persuade
the fellow that he did wrong, or that I would ever prosecute him for
poaching--I must desire you will wink hard at the practices of this
rascallion, otherwise I shall be plagued with his presents, which cost
me more than they are worth.--If I could wonder at any thing Fitzowen
does, I should be surprized at his assurance in desiring you to solicit
my vote for him at the next election for the county: for him, who
opposed me, on the like occasion, with the most illiberal competition.
You may tell him civilly, that I beg to be excused. Direct your next for
me at Bath, whither I propose to remove to-morrow; not only on my own
account, but for the sake of my niece, Liddy, who is like to relapse.
The poor creature fell into a fit yesterday, while I was cheapening a
pair of spectacles, with a Jew-pedlar. I am afraid there is something
still lurking in that little heart of hers, which I hope a change of
objects will remove. Let me know what you think of this half-witted
Doctor’s impertinent, ridiculous, and absurd notion of my disorder--So
far from being dropsical, I am as lank in the belly as a grey-hound;
and, by measuring my ancle with a pack-thread, I find the swelling
subsides every day. From such doctors, good Lord deliver us!--I have not
yet taken any lodgings in Bath; because there we can be accommodated at
a minute’s warning, and I shall choose for myself--I need not say your
directions for drinking and bathing will be agreeable to,