Here’s another screamingly funny Piperock story by W. C. Tuttle

Old Runnin’ Wolf claims that he’s the son of a chief. Most Injuns do, as

far as that’s concerned; but Runnin’ Wolf covers too many tribes in his

claim to greatness. On one bottle of kidney cure he can become a son of

Sittin’ Bull. Give him a couple shots extra of hair tonic, and he claims

Chief Joseph, of the Nez Perce tribe, as his father. A pint of corn

liquor drives him plumb back to Pontiac; and I’ve knowed him to mourn a

heap over the death of his sister, Pocahontas.

Runnin’ Wolf is six feet six inches tall, and if it wasn’t for the size

of his nose he could dive out of sight in a shotgun barrel. Nobody knows

how old he is, and nobody cares. He’s jist a mean lookin’ old war whoop,

who lives in a teepee outside the town of Piperock, schemin’ all the

time to get money enough to buy alcohol, and a little left over for a

poker game. Can he play that pastime? Give him two deuces, and he’ll win

more jackpots than any livin’ aborigine.

At one time in his distant past, Runnin’ Wolf traveled with a medicine

show. The owner was one of them sleight-of-hand fellers, crooked as a

snake in a cactus patch, and he taught Runnin’ Wolf how to play winnin’

poker. And that war whoop, comin’ straight from a long line of

horsethieves, et cettery, shore absorbed knowledge. I wouldn’t play him

for a two-bit piece, if he’d let me do the dealin’. Yaller Rock County

knows him so well that he’s in the sere and yaller leaf, as far as

winnin’ anythin’ goes.

Me and Dirty Shirt Jones are settin’ on the hitch rack in front of Buck

Masterson’s saloon one mornin’, like a couple old buzzards, lookin’ for

something to happen. Dirty Shirt ain’t very big, but he’s got a man

sized capacity for anythin’ you might mention. His left eye is his

predominatin’ feature, bein’ as it ain’t noways fixed like a regular

eye, but kinda darts hither and yon, finally comin’ to rest in the

northwest section of his eye socket, peerin’ up at the angle between his

crooked nose and his eyebrow. All of which gives Dirty a cockeyed

expression.

We’re settin’ there, tryin’ to elect a Democrat President, when here

comes old Burnin’ Wolf, headin’ across from the post office, trailin’

his blanket.

“I ain’t goin’ t’ lend that old marrowgut a cent more,” declares Dirty.

But Burnin’ Wolf merely scratches his shoulders against the rack post,

picks up the butt of the cigaret I’ve jist dropped and asks me for a

match.

“Gittum letta,” he says.

“Who got a letter?” asks Dirty.

“Me gittum letta.”

“Who from?”

The old boy fishes out a dirty envelope from inside his shirt and hands

it to me. In one corner of the envelope it says, “Barker Brothers Great

Consolidated Shows”.

“Dirty Dora prob’ly died and they’re askin’ Wolf to take his place,”

says Dirty Shirt. “Open it up--the war whoop can’t read.”

Injuneered · 第 2 / 5 题