I Leave Zurich--Comic Adventure at Baden--Soleure--M. De Chavigni--M. and
Madame * * * I Act in a Play--I Counterfeit Sickness to Attain Happiness
M. Mote, my landlord, introduced his two sons to me. He had brought them
up like young princes. In Switzerland, an inn-keeper is not always a man
of no account. There are many who are as much respected as people of far
higher rank are in other countries. But each country has its own manners.
My landlord did the honours of the table, and thought it no degradation
to make his guests pay for the meal. He was right; the only really
degrading thing in the world is vice. A Swiss landlord only takes the
chief place at table to see that everyone is properly attended to. If he
have a son, he does not sit down with his father, but waits on the
guests, with napkin in hand. At Schaffhaus, my landlord's son, who was a
captain in the Imperial army, stood behind my chair and changed my plate,
while his father sat at the head of the table. Anywhere else the son
would have been waited on, but in his father's house he thought, and
rightly, that it was an honour to wait.
Such are Swiss customs, of which persons of superficial understanding
very foolishly make a jest. All the same, the vaunted honour and loyalty
of the Swiss do not prevent them from fleecing strangers, at least as
much as the Dutch, but the greenhorns who let themselves be cheated,
learn thereby that it is well to bargain before-hand, and then they treat
one well and charge reasonably. In this way, when I was at Bale, I
baffled the celebrated Imhoff, the landlord of the "Three Kings."
M. Ote complimented me on my waiter's disguise, and said he was sorry not
to have seen me officiating, nevertheless, he said he thought I was wise
not to repeat the jest. He thanked me for the honour I had done his
house, and begged me to do him the additional favour of dining at his
table some day before I left. I answered that I would dine with him with
pleasure that very day. I did so, and was treated like a prince.
The reader will have guessed that the last look my charmer gave me had
not extinguished the fire which the first sight of her had kindled in my
breast. It had rather increased my flame by giving me hopes of being
better acquainted with her; in short, it inspired me with the idea of
going to Soleure in order to give a happy ending to the adventure. I took
a letter of credit on Geneva, and wrote to Madame d'Urfe, begging her to
give me a written introduction, couched in strong terms to M. de
Chavigni, the French ambassador, telling her that the interests of our
order were highly involved in my knowing this diplomatist, and requesting
her to address letters to me at the post office at Soleure. I also wrote
to the Duke of Wurtemburg, but had no answer from him, and indeed he must
have found my epistle very unpleasant reading.
I visited the old woman whom Giustiniani had told me of several times
before I left Zurich, and although I ought to have been well satisfied as
far as physical beauty was concerned, my enjoyment was very limited, as
the nymphs I wooed only spoke Swiss dialect--a rugged corruption of
German. I have always found that love without speech gives little
enjoyment, and I cannot imagine a more unsatisfactory mistress than a
mute, were she as lovely as Venus herself.
I had scarcely left Zurich when I was obliged to stop at Baden to have
the carriage M. Ote had got me mended. I might have started again at
eleven, but on hearing that a young Polish lady on her way to Our Lady of
Einseidel was to dine at the common table, I decided to wait; but I had
my trouble for nothing, as she turned out to be quite unworthy of the
delay.
After dinner, while my horses were being put in, the host's daughter, a
pretty girl enough, came into the room and made me waltz with her; it
chanced to be a Sunday. All at once her father came in, and the girl
fled.
"Sir," said the rascal, "you are condemned to pay a fine of one louis."
"Why?"
"For having danced on a holy day."
"Get out; I won't pay."
"You will pay, though," said he, shewing me a great parchment covered
with writing I did not understand.
"I will appeal."
"To whom, sir?"
"To the judge of the place."
He left the room, and in a quarter of an hour I was told that the judge
was waiting for me in an adjoining chamber. I thought to myself that the
judges were very polite in that part of the world, but when I got into
the room I saw the rascally host buried in a wig and gown.
"Sir," said he, "I am the judge."
"Judge and plaintiff too, as far as I can see."
He wrote in his book, confirming the sentence, and mulcting me in six
francs for the costs of the case.
"But if your daughter had not tempted me." said I, "I should not have
danced; she is therefore as guilty as I."
"Very true, sir; here is a Louis for her." So saying he took a Louis out
of his pocket, put it into a desk beside him, and said; "Now yours."
I began to laugh, paid my fine, and put off my departure till the morrow.
As I was going to Lucerne I saw the apostolic nuncio (who invited me to
dinner), and at Fribourg Comte d'Afri's young and charming wife; but at
ten leagues from Soleure I was a witness of the following curious
circumstances.
I was stopping the night in a village, and had made friends with the
surgeon, whom I had found at the inn, and while supper, which he was to
share with me, was getting ready, we walked about the village together.
It was in the dusk of the evening, and at a distance of a hundred paces I
saw a man climbing up the wall of a house, and finally vanishing through
a window on the first floor.
"That's a robber," said I, pointing him out to the surgeon. He laughed
and said,--
"The custom may astonish you, but it is a common one in many parts of
Switzerland. The man you have just seen is a young lover who is going to
pass the night with his future bride. Next morning he will leave more
ardent than before, as she will not allow him to go too far. If she was
weak enough to yield to his desires he would probably decline to marry
her, and she would find it difficult to get married at all."
At Soleure I found a letter from Madame d'Urfe, with an enclosure from
the Duc de Choiseul to the ambassador, M. de Chavigni. It was sealed, but
the duke's name was written below the address.
I made a Court toilet, took a coach, and went to call on the ambassador.
His excellency was not at home, so I left my card and the letter. It was
a feast-day, and I went to high mass, not so much, I confess, to seek for
God as for my charmer, but she was not there. After service I walked
around the town, and on my return found an officer who asked me to dinner
at the ambassador's.
Madame d'Urfe said that on the receipt of my letter she had gone
straightway to Versailles, and that with the help of Madame de Grammont
she had got me an introduction of the kind I wanted. This was good news
for me, as I desired to cut an imposing figure at Soleure. I had plenty
of money, and I knew that this magic metal glittered in the eyes of all.
M. de Chavigni had been ambassador at Venice thirty years before, and I
knew a number of anecdotes about his adventures there, and I was eager to
see what I could make out of him.
I went to his house at the time appointed, and found all his servants in
full livery, which I looked upon as a happy omen. My name was not
announced, and I remarked that when I came in both sides of the door were
opened for me by the page. A fine old man came forward to meet me, and
paying me many well-turned compliments introduced me to those present.
Then, with the delicate tact of the courtier, pretending not to recollect
my name, he drew the Duc de Choiseul's letter from his pocket, and read
aloud the paragraph in which the minister desired him to treat me with
the utmost consideration. He made me sit on an easy chair at his right
hand, and asked me questions to which I could only answer that I was
travelling for my pleasure, and that I considered the Swiss nation to be
in many respects superior to all other nations whatsoever.
Dinner was served, and his excellency set me on his right hand in a
position of equal honour to his own. We were sixteen in company, and
behind every chair stood a magnificent lackey in the ambassador's livery.
In the course of conversation I got an opportunity of telling the
ambassador that he was still spoken of at Venice with the utmost
affection.
"I shall always remember," he said, "the kindness with which the
Venetians treated me; but tell me, I beg, the names of those gentlemen
who still remember me; they must be quite old now."
This was what I was waiting for. M. de Malipiero had told me of certain
events which had happened during the regency, and M. de Bragadin had
informed me of the ambassador's amours with the celebrated Stringhetta.
His excellency's fare was perfect, but in the pleasure of conversing I
forgot that of eating. I told all my anecdotes so racily that his
features expressed the pleasure I was affording him, and when we rose
from the table he shook me by the hand, and told me he had not had so
agreeable a dinner since he had been at Soleure.
"The recollection of my Venetian gallantries," said the worthy old man,
"makes me recall many a happy moment; I feel quite young again."
He embraced me, and bade me consider myself as one of his family during
my stay at Soleure.
After dinner he talked a good deal about Venice, praising the Government,
and saying that there was not a town in the world where a man could fare
better, provided he took care to get good oil and foreign wines. About
five o'clock he asked me to come for a drive with him, getting into the
carriage first to give me the best place.
We got out at a pretty country house where ices were served to us. On our
way back he said that he had a large party every evening, and that he
hoped I would do him the honour to be present whenever it suited my
inclinations, assuring me that he would do his best to amuse me. I was
impatient to take part in the assembly, as I felt certain I should see my
charmer there. It was a vain hope, however, for I saw several ladies,
some old and ugly, some passable, but not one pretty.
Cards were produced, and I soon found myself at a table with a young lady
of fair complexion and a plain-looking woman well advanced in years, who
seemed, however, not to be destitute of wit. Though I was looed I played
on, and I lost five or six hundred fish without opening my lips. When it
came to a profit and loss account, the plain woman told me I owed three
louis.
"Three louis, madam."
"Yes, sir; we have been playing at two sous the fish. You thought,
perhaps, we were playing for farthings."
"On the contrary, I thought it was for francs, as I never play lower."
She did not answer this boast of mine, but she seemed annoyed. On
rejoining the company after this wearisome game, I proceeded to
scrutinize all the ladies present rapidly but keenly, but I could not see
her for whom I looked, and was on the point of leaving, when I happened
to notice two ladies who were looking at me attentively. I recognized
them directly. They were two of my fair one's companions, whom I had had
the honour of waiting on at Zurich. I hurried off, pretending not to
recognize them.
Next day, a gentleman in the ambassador's suite came to tell me that his
excellency was going to call on me. I told him that I would not go out
till I had the honour of receiving his master, and I conceived the idea
of questioning him concerning that which lay next to my heart. However,
he spared me the trouble, as the reader will see for himself.
I gave M. de Chavigni the best reception I could, and after we had
discussed the weather he told me, with a smile, that he had the most
ridiculous affair to broach to me, begging me to credit him when he said
that he did not believe it for a moment.
"Proceed, my lord."
"Two ladies who saw you at my house yesterday told me in confidence,
after you had gone, that I should do well to be on my guard, as you were
the waiter in an inn at Zurich where they had stayed. They added that
they had seen the other waiter by the Aar, and that in all probability
you had run away from the inn together; God alone knows why! They said,
furthermore, that you slipped away from my house yesterday as soon as you
saw them. I told them that even if you were not the bearer of a letter
from his grace the Duc de Choiseul I should have been convinced that they
were mistaken, and that they should dine with you to-day, if they would
accept my invitation. I also hinted that you might have merely disguised
yourself as a waiter in the hopes of winning some favours from them, but
they rejected the hypothesis as absurd, and said that you could carve a
capon and change a plate dexterously enough, but were only a common
waiter for all that, adding that with my permission they would compliment
you on your skill to-day.
"'Do so, by all means, ladies,' said I, 'M. Casanova and myself will be
highly amused.' And now do you mind telling me whether there be any
foundation of truth in the whole story?"
"Certainly, my lord, I will tell you all without reserve, but in
confidence, as this ridiculous report may injure the honour of one who is
dear to me, and whom I would not injure for the world."
"It is true, then? I am quite interested to hear all about it."
"It is true to a certain extent; I hope you don't take me for the real
waiter at the 'Sword.'"
"Certainly not, but I supposed you played the part of waiter?"
"Exactly. Did they tell you that they were four in company."
"Ah, I have got it! Pretty Madame was one of the party. That explains the
riddle; now I understand everything. But you were quite right in saying
that discretion was needful; she has a perfectly blameless reputation."
"Ah! I did not know that. What happened was quite innocent, but it might
be so garbled in the telling as to become prejudicial to the honour of a
lady whose beauty struck me with admiration."
I told him all the details of the case, adding that I had only come to
Soleure in the hopes of succeeding in my suit.
"If that prove an impossibility," said I, "I shall leave Soleure in three
or four days; but I will first turn the three ugly companions of my
charmer into ridicule. They might have had sense enough to guess that the
waiter's apron was only a disguise. They can only pretend to be ignorant
of the fact in the hope of getting some advantage over me, and injuring
their friend, who was ill advised to let them into the secret."
"Softly, softly, you go too fast and remind me of my own young days.
Permit me to embrace you, your story has delighted me. You shall not go
away, you shall stay here and court your charmer. To-day you can turn two
mischievous women into ridicule, but do it in an easy way. The thing is
so straightforward that M.---- will be the first to laugh at it. His wife
cannot be ignorant of your love for her, and I know enough of women to
pronounce that your disguise cannot have displeased her. She does know of
your love?"
"Undoubtedly."
He went away laughing, and at the door of his coach embraced me for the
third time.
I could not doubt that my charmer had told the whole story to her three
friends as they were returning from Einsiedel to Zurich, and this made
the part they had played all the more ill-natured; but I felt that it was
to my interest to let their malice pass for wit.
I went to the ambassador's at half-past one, and after making my bow to
him I proceeded to greet the company, and saw the two ladies. Thereupon,
with a frank and generous air, I went up to the more malicious-looking of
the two (she was lame, which may have made me think her more ill-looking)
and asked if she recognized me.
"You confess, then, that you are the waiter at the 'Sword'?"
"Well, not quite that, madam, but I confess that I was the waiter for an
hour, and that you cruelly disdained to address a single word to me,
though I was only a waiter, because I longed for the bliss of seeing you.
But I hope I shall be a little more fortunate here, and that you will
allow me to pay you my respectful homage."
"This is very wonderful! You played your part so well that the sharpest
eye would have been deceived. Now we shall see if you play your new part
as well. If you do me the honour to call on me I will give you a good
welcome."
After these complimentary speeches, the story became public property, and
the whole table was amusing itself with it, when I had the happiness of
seeing M.---- and Madame coming into the room.
"There is the good-natured waiter," said she to her husband.
The worthy man stepped forward, and politely thanked me for having done
his wife the honour of taking off her boots.
This told me that she had concealed nothing, and I was glad. Dinner was
served, M. de Chavigni made my charmer sit at his right hand, and I was
placed between my two calumniators. I was obliged to hide my game, so,
although I disliked them intensely, I made love to them, hardly raising
my eyes to glance at Madame, who looked ravishing. I did not find her
husband either as old or as jealous as I had expected. The ambassador
asked him and his wife to stay the evening to an impromptu ball, and then
said, that in order for me to be able to tell the Duc de Choiseul that I
was well amused at Soleure, he would be delighted to have a play, if
Madame would act the fair 'Ecossaise' again. She said she should be
delighted, but two more actors were wanted.
"That is all right," said the kind old gentleman, "I will play Montrose."
"And I, Murray," I remarked.
My lame friend, angry at this arrangement, which only left her the very
bad part of Lady Alton, could not help lancing a shaft at me.
"Oh! why isn't there a waiter's part in the play?" said she, "you would
play it so well."
"That is well said, but I hope you will teach me to play Murray even
better."
Next morning, I got the words of my part, and the ambassador told me that
the ball would be given in my honour. After dinner I went to my inn, and
after making an elaborate toilette I returned to the brilliant company.
The ambassador begged me to open the ball, and introduced me to the
highest born but not the most beautiful lady in the place. I then danced
with all the ladies present until the good-natured old man got me the
object of my vows as a partner in the quadrilles, which he did so easily
that no one could have made any remark. "Lord Murray," said he, "must
dance with no one but Lindane."
At the first pause I took the opportunity of saying that I had only come
to Soleure for her sake, that it was for her sake that I had disguised
myself at Zurich, and that I hoped she would permit me to pay my
addresses to her.
"I cannot invite you to my house," said she, "for certain sufficient
reasons; but if you will stay here some time we shall be able to see each
other. But I entreat you not to shew me any marked attention in public,
for there are those who will spy upon our actions, and it is not pleasant
to be talked about."
I was quite satisfied with this, and told her that I would do all in my
power to please her, and that the most prying eyes should have nothing to
fix on. I felt that the pleasure I looked forward to would be rendered
all the sweeter by a tincture of mystery.
I had proclaimed myself as a novice in the mimic art, and had entreated
my lame friend to be kind enough to instruct me. I therefore went to her
in the morning, but she could only flatter herself that hers was a
reflected light, as I had opportunities for paying my court to my charmer
in her house, and however great her vanity may have been, she must have
had some suspicions of the truth.
This woman was a widow, aged between thirty and forty years, of a
jaundiced complexion, and a piercing and malicious aspect. In her efforts
to hide the inequality of her legs, she walked with a stiff and awkward
air; and, wishing to be thought a wit, she increased her natural dullness
by a ceaseless flow of small talk. I persisted in behaving towards her
with a great air of respect, and one day she said that, having seen me in
the disguise of a waiter, she would not have thought I was a man of a
timid nature.
"In what respect do you think me timid?" said I; to which she gave me no
answer, but I knew perfectly well what she meant. I was tired of my part,
and I had determined to play it no more when we had acted L'Ecossaise.
All the best people at Soleure were present at our first performance. The
lame lady was delighted with the horror inspired by her acting; but she
might credit a great deal of it to her appearance. M. de Chavigni drew
forth the tears of the audience, his acting was said to be better than
the great Voltaire's. As for me, I remember how near I was to fainting
when, in the third scene of the fifth act, Lindane said to me,
"What! You! You dare to love me?"
She pronounced these words with such fiery scorn that all the spectators
applauded vehemently. I was almost put out of countenance, for I thought
I detected in her voice an insult to my honour. However, I collected
myself in the minute's respite which the loud applause gave me, and I
replied,---
"Yes; I adore you! How should I not?"
So pathetically and tenderly did I pronounce these words that the hall
rang again with the applause, and the encores from four hundred throats
made me repeat the words which, indeed, came from my heart.
In spite of the pleasure we had given to the audience, we judged
ourselves not perfect in our parts, and M. de Chavigni advised us to put
off our second performance for a couple of days.
"We will have a rehearsal to-morrow at my country house," said he, "and I
beg the favour of all your companies to dinner there."
However, we all made each other compliments on our acting. My lame friend
told me I had played well, but not so well as in the part of waiter,
which really suited me admirably. This sarcasm got the laugh on her side,
but I returned it by telling her that my performance was a work of art,
while her playing of Lady Alton was pure nature. M. de Chavigni told
Madame that the spectators were wrong to applaud when she expressed her
wonder at my loving her, since she had spoken the words disdainfully; and
it was impossible that Lindane could have despised Murray. The ambassador
called for me the next day in his carriage, and when we reached his
country-house we found all the actors assembled there. His excellency
addressed himself in the first place to M.----, telling him he thought
his business was as good as done, and that they would talk about it after
dinner. We sat down to table, and afterwards rehearsed the piece without
any need of the prompter's assistance.
Towards evening the ambassador told the company that he would expect them
to supper that evening at Soleure, and everyone left with the exception
of the ambassador, myself, and M.---- and Madame----. Just as we were
going I had an agreeable surprise.
"Will you come with me," said the Ambassador to M.----, "we can talk the
matter over at our ease? M. Casanova will have the honour of keeping
your wife company in your carriage."
I gave the fair lady my hand respectfully, and she took it with an air of
indifference, but as I was helping her in she pressed my hand with all
her might. The reader can imagine how that pressure made my blood
circulate like fire in my veins.
Thus we were seated side by side, our knees pressed tenderly against each
other. Half an hour seemed like a minute, but it must not be thought that
we wasted the time. Our lips were glued together, and were not set apart
till we came within ten paces of the ambassador's house, which I could
have wished at ten leagues distance. She was the first to get down, and I
was alarmed to see the violent blush which overspread her whole face.
Such redness looked unnatural; it might betray us; our spring of
happiness would soon be dry. The watchful eye of the envious Alton would
be fixed upon us, and not in vain; her triumph would outweigh her
humiliation. I was at my wits' end.
Love and luck, which have so favoured me throughout the course of my
life, came to my aid. I had about me a small box containing hellebore. I
opened it as if by instinct, and invited her to take a small pinch. She
did so, and I followed her example; but the dose was too strong, and as
we were going up the stairs we began to sneeze, and for the next quarter
of an hour we continued sneezing. People were obliged to attribute her
high colour to the sneezing, or at least no one could give voice to any
other suppositions. When the sneezing fit was over, this woman, who was
as clever as she was pretty, said her headache was gone, but she would
take care another time not to take so strong a dose. I looked out of the
corner of my eye at the malicious widow, who said nothing but seemed deep
in thought.
This piece of good luck decided me on staying at Soleure till my love was
crowned with success, and I determined to take a country house. I shall
not have much opinion of my readers if they find themselves in my
position--rich, young, independent, full of fire, and having only
pleasure to seek for--and do not follow my example. A perfect beauty was
before me with whom I was madly in love, and who, I was sure, shared that
love. I had plenty of money, and I was my own master. I thought this a
much better plan than turning monk, and I was above caring "what people
would say." As soon as the ambassador had returned, which he always did
at an early hour on account of his advanced age, I left the company and
went to see him in his private room. In truth I felt I must give him that
confidence which he had so well deserved.
As soon as he saw me he said,--
"Well, well, did you profit by the interview I got you?"
I embraced him, and said,--
"I may hope for everything."
When I was telling him about the hellebore he was lavish in his
compliments on my presence of mind, for, as he said, such an unusual
colour would have made people think there had been some kind of a
combat--a supposition which would not have tended towards my success.
After I had told him all, I imparted my plan.
"I shall do nothing in a hurry," said I, "as I have to take care that the
lady's honour does not suffer, and I trust to time to see the
accomplishment of my wishes. I shall want a pretty country house, a good
carriage, two lackeys, a good cook, and a housekeeper. All that I leave
to your excellency, as I look upon you as my refuge and guardian angel."
"To-morrow, without fail, I will see what I can do, and I have good hopes
of doing you a considerable service and of rendering you well content
with the attractions of Soleure."
Next day our rehearsal went off admirably, and the day after the
ambassador spoke to me as follows:
"So far as I can see, what you are aiming at in this intrigue is the
satisfying of your desires without doing any harm to the lady's
reputation. I think I know the nature of your love for her well enough to
say that if she told you that your leaving Soleure was necessary to her
peace of mind you would leave her at once. You see that I have sounded
you well enough to be a competent adviser in this delicate and important
affair, to which the most famous events in the annals of diplomacy are
not to be compared."
"Your excellency does not do sufficient justice to a career which has
gained you such distinction."
"That's because I am an old man, my dear fellow, and have shaken off the
rust and dust of prejudices, and am able to see things as they really
are, and appreciate them at their true value. But let us return to your
love-affair. If you wish to keep it in the dark, you must avoid with the
greatest care any action which may awaken suspicion in the minds of
people who do not believe that anything is indifferent. The most
malicious and censorious will not be able to get anything but the merest
chance out of the interview I procured you today, and the accident of the
sneezing bout, defy the most ill-natured to draw any deductions; for an
eager lover does not begin his suit by sending the beloved one into
convulsions. Nobody can guess that your hellebore was used to conceal the
blush that your caresses occasioned, since it does not often happen that
an amorous combat leaves such traces; and how can you be expected to have
foreseen the lady's blushes, and to have provided yourself with a
specific against them? In short, the events of to-day will not disclose
your secret. M.---- who, although he wishes to pass for a man devoid of
jealousy, is a little jealous; M.---- himself cannot have seen anything
out of the common in my asking him to return with me, as I had business
of importance with him, and he has certainly no reasons for supposing
that I should be likely to help you to intrigue with his wife.
Furthermore, the laws of politeness would have forbidden me, under any
circumstances, offering the lady the place I offered him, and as he
prides himself on his politeness he can raise no possible objection to
the arrangement which was made. To be sure I am old and you are young--a
distinction not unimportant in a husband's eyes." After this exordium,
added the good-natured ambassador, with a laugh, "an exordium which I
have delivered in the official style of a secretary of state, let us see
where we are. Two things are necessary for you to obtain your wished-for
bliss. The first thing, which concerns you more particularly, is to make
M.---- your friend, and to conceal from him that you have conceived a
passion for his wife, and here I will aid you to the best of my ability.
The second point concerns the lady's honour; all your relations with her
must appear open and above-board. Consider yourself under my protection;
you must not even take a country house before we have found out some plan
for throwing dust into the eyes of the observant. However, you need not
be anxious; I have hit upon a plan.
"You must pretend to be taken ill, but your illness must be of such a
kind that your doctor will be obliged to take your word for the symptoms.
Luckily, I know a doctor whose sole idea is to order country air for all
complaints. This physician, who is about as clever as his brethren, and
kills or cures as well as any of them, will come and feel my pulse one of
these days. You must take his advice, and for a couple of louis he will
write you a prescription with country air as the chief item. He will then
inform everybody that your case is serious, but that he will answer for
your cure."
"What is his name?"
"Doctor Herrenschwand."
"What is he doing here? I knew him at Paris; he was Madame du Rumain's
doctor."
"That is his brother. Now find out some polite complaint, which will do
you credit with the public. It will be easy enough to find a house, and I
will get you an excellent cook to make your gruel and beef-tea."
The choice of a complaint cost me some thought; I had to give it a good
deal of attention. The same evening I managed to communicate my plan to
Madame who approved of it. I begged her to think of some way of writing
to me, and she said she would.
"My husband," said she, "has a very high opinion of you. He has taken no
offence at our coming in the same carriage. But tell me, was it an
accident or design that made M. de Chavigni take my husband and leave us
together?"
"It was the result of design, dearest." She raised her beautiful eyes and
bit her lips. "Are you sorry it was so?"
"Alas! no."
In three or four days, on the day on which we were going to act
L'Ecossaise, the doctor came to dine with the ambassador and stayed till
the evening to see the play. At dessert he complimented me on my good
health, on which I took the opportunity, and told him that appearances
were deceitful, and that I should be glad to consult him the next day. No
doubt he was delighted to be deceived in his estimate of my health, and
he said he should be glad if he could be of any service. He called on me
at the hour agreed upon, and I told him such symptoms as my fancy
dictated; amongst other things, that I was subject to certain nocturnal
irritations which made me extremely weak, especially in the reins.
"Quite so, quite so; it's a troublesome thing, but we will see what can
be done. My first remedy, which you may possibly not care much for, is
for you to pass six weeks in the country, where you will not see those
objects which impress your brain, acting on the seventh pair of nerves,
and causing that lumbar discharge which no doubt leaves you in a very
depressed state."
"Yes, it certainly does."
"Quite so, quite so. My next remedy is cold bathing."
"Are the baths far from here?"
"They are wherever you like. I will write you a prescription, and the
druggist will make it up."
I thanked him, and after he had pouched the double-louis I slipped
politely into his hand, he went away assuring me that I should soon
experience an improvement in my health. By the evening the whole town
knew that I was ill and had to go into the country. M. de Chavigni said
pleasantly at dinner to the doctor, that he should have forbidden me all
feminine visitors; and my lame friend, refining on the idea, added that I
should above all be debarred access to certain portraits, of which I had
a box-full. I laughed approvingly, and begged M. de Chavigni, in the
presence of the company, to help me to find a pretty house and a good
cook, as I did not intend to take my meals alone.
I was tired of playing a wearisome part, and had left off going to see my
lame friend, but she soon reproached me for my inconstancy, telling me
that I had made a tool of her. "I know all," said this malicious woman,
"and I will be avenged."
"You cannot be avenged for nothing," said I, "for I have never done you
an injury. However, if you intend to have me assassinated, I shall apply
for police protection."
"We don't assassinate here," said she, savagely. "We are not Italians."
I was delighted to be relieved from the burden of her society, and
henceforth Madame was the sole object of my thoughts. M. de Chavigni, who
seemed to delight in serving me, made her husband believe that I was the
only person who could get the Duc de Choiseul to pardon a cousin of his
who was in the guards, and had had the misfortune to kill his man in a
duel. "This," said the kindly old gentleman, "is the best way possible of
gaining the friendship of your rival. Do you think you can manage it?"
"I am not positive of success."
"Perhaps I have gone a little too far; but I told him that by means of
your acquaintance with the Duchesse de Grammont you could do anything
with the minister."
"I must make you a true prophet; I will do all I can."
The consequence was that M.---- informed me of the facts in the
ambassador's presence, and brought me all the papers relative to the
case.
I spent the night in writing to the Duchesse de Grammont. I made my
letter as pathetic as possible, with a view to touching her heart, and
then her father's; and I then wrote to the worthy Madame d'Urfe telling
her that the well-being of the sublime order of the Rosy Cross was
concerned in the pardon of a Swiss officer, who had been obliged to leave
the kingdom on account of a duel in which the order was highly concerned.
In the morning, after resting for an hour, I went to the ambassador, and
shewed him the letter I had written to the duchess. He thought it
excellently expressed, and advised me to skew it to M.---- I found him
with his night-cap on; he was extremely grateful for the interest I took
in a matter which was so near to his heart. He told me that his wife had
not yet risen, and asked me to wait and take breakfast with her. I should
have much liked to accept the invitation, but I begged him to make my
excuses to his lady for my absence, on the pretence that I had to finish
my letters, and hand them to the courier who was just leaving. I hoped in
this way to scatter any jealousy that might be hovering in his brain, by
the slight importance I attached to a meeting with his wife.
I went to dine with M. de Chavigni, who thought my conduct had been very
politic, and said that he was certain that henceforth M.---- would be my
best friend. He then skewed me a letter from Voltaire thanking him for
playing Montrose in his Ecossaise; and another from the Marquis de
Chauvelin, who was then at Delices with the philosopher of Ferney. He
promised to come and see him after he had been to Turin, where he had
been appointed ambassador.