The POSTMASTER-GENERAL and the CHANCELLOR OF THE EXCHEQUER are at this
moment the most melancholy of men. For the last few months they had been
quietly chuckling to themselves over one of the most brilliant ideas
that ever adorned the annals of Government. But the best laid schemes
gang aft agley.
While publicists and economic experts were shaking their grey hairs over
the prospect of national bankruptcy, the P.M.G. and the C. of E. were
weeping jazz tears of joy as the national debt lifted before their
eyes "like mist unrolled on the morning wind." And then certain
unsophisticated Members of a new, a very new, House of Commons began
their deadly work. As a result the main scheme of national solvency is
in danger.
There are those who still think that the franchise was extended to women
merely as an objective piece of political justice. I hate cynicism, and
I should be the last to throw cold water on an ideal, but, as I said,
the real fruits of that political master-stroke are in danger.
While millions of enfranchised women were quietly engaged in writing
twice a week to their particular Member, at three half-pence a time (or
more), they were unconsciously assisting the considered policy of His
Majesty's Government, which was that such letters should be written and
remain unanswered; that more letters and still more should be written,
stamped and posted to demand an answer, and that still more should be
written to friends and relations exposing the grave lack of courtesy at
Westminster.
But, alas! certain Members, with monumental naïveté, have thought fit
to take their correspondence seriously. They have put questions to
Ministers. They have in so many crude words openly on the floor of the
House referred to "the increase in the number of letters which Members
now receive from their constituents on parliamentary matters, owing to
the recent additions to the franchise and its extension to women."
They have pleaded for the privilege of "franking" their answers. Could
perversity go further? What woman will continue to write to a Member who
satisfies her curiosity? And what of the unwritten, unstamped, unposted
letters of just indignation to friends and relations?
The P.M.G.'s laconic answer to this monstrous request, "I do not think
it would be expedient," was highly commendable as a feat of Ministerial
restraint. But the gloom that has settled on him is only too solidly
grounded. These afflicted Members are out to raise a sentimental
public opinion in support of their silly demand. Then, of course, the
Government will capitulate, and the country will go Bolshevik from
excessive taxation.
Will not all patriotic women constituents write at once to their Members
and point out the folly of this agitation?
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[Illustration: "I SHALL NEVER FIND ANYONE ELSE LIKE YOU. YOU SEE, YOU'RE
SO DIFFERENT FROM OTHER GIRLS."
"OH, BUT YOU'LL FIND LOTS OF OTHER GIRLS DIFFERENT FROM OTHER GIRLS."]
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