CHAPTER I. THE BIRTHDAY

Produced by Charles Franks and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team

JEREMY

By Hugh Walpole

TO

BRUCE

FROM

HIS LOVING UNCLE

CONTENTS

CHAPTER

I THE BIRTHDAY

II THE FAMILY DOG

III CHRISTMAS PANTOMIME

IV MISS JONES

V THE SEA-CAPTAIN

VI FAMILY PRIDE

VII RELIGION

VIII TO COW FARM

IX THE AWAKENING OF CHARLOTTE

X MARY

XI THE MERRY-GO-ROUND

XII HAMLET WAITS

“It is due to him to say that he was

an obedient boy and a boy whose word

could be depended on...”

Jackanapes

CHAPTER I. THE BIRTHDAY

I

About thirty years ago there was at the top of the right-hand side of

Orange Street, in Polchester, a large stone house. I say “was”; the

shell of it is still there, and the people who now live in it are quite

unaware, I suppose, that anything has happened to the inside of it,

except that they are certainly assured that their furniture is vastly

superior to the furniture of their predecessors. They have a gramophone,

a pianola, and a lift to bring the plates from the kitchen into the

dining-room, and a small motor garage at the back where the old pump

used to be, and a very modern rock garden where once was the pond with

the fountain that never worked. Let them cherish their satisfaction.

No one grudges it to them. The Coles were, by modern standards,

old-fashioned people, and the Stone House was an old-fashioned house.

Young Jeremy Cole was born there in the year 1884, very early in the

morning of December 8th. He was still there very early in the morning of

December 8th, 1892. He was sitting up in bed. The cuckoo clock had just

struck five, and he was aware that he was, at this very moment, for the

first time in his life, eight years old. He had gone to bed at eight

o'clock on the preceding evening with the choking consciousness that he

would awake in the morning a different creature. Although he had

slept, there had permeated the texture of his dreams that same choking

excitement, and now, wide awake, as though he had asked the cuckoo to

call him in order that he might not be late for the great occasion,

he stared into the black distance of his bedroom and reflected, with a

beating heart, upon the great event. He was eight years old, and he had

as much right now to the nursery arm-chair with a hole in it as Helen

had.

That was his first definite realisation of approaching triumph.

Throughout the whole of his seventh year he had fought with Helen, who

was most unjustly a year older than he and persistently proud of that

injustice, as to his right to use the wicker arm-chair whensoever it

pleased him. So destructive of the general peace of the house had

these incessant battles been, so unavailing the suggestions of elderly

relations that gentlemen always yielded to ladies, that a compromise had

been arrived at. When Jeremy was eight he should have equal rights with

Helen. Well and good. Jeremy had yielded to that. It was the only decent

chair in the nursery. Into the place where the wicker, yielding to

rude and impulsive pressure, had fallen away, one's body might be

most happily fitted. It was of exactly the right height; it made the

handsomest creaking noises when one rocked in it--and, in any case,

Helen was only a girl.

But the sense of his triumph had not yet fully descended upon him. As he

sat up in bed, yawning, with a tickle in the middle of his back and his

throat very dry; he was disappointingly aware that he was still the same

Jeremy of yesterday. He did not know what it was exactly that he had

expected, but he did not feel at present that confident proud glory for

which he had been prepared. Perhaps it was too early.

He turned round, curled his head into his arm, and with a half-muttered,

half-dreamt statement about the wicker chair, he was once again asleep.

II

He awoke to the customary sound of the bath water running into the bath.

His room was flooded with sunshine, and old Jampot, the nurse (her name

was Mrs. Preston and her shape was Jampot), was saying as usual:

“Now, Master Jeremy, eight o'clock; no lying in bed--out--you

get--bath--ready.”

He stared at her, blinking.

“You should say 'Many Happy Returns of the Day, Master Jeremy,'” he

remarked. Then suddenly, with a leap, he was out of bed, had crossed

the floor, pushed back the nursery door, and was sitting in the wicker

arm-chair, his naked feet kicking a triumphant dance.

“Helen! Helen!” he called. “I'm in the chair.”

No sound.

“I'm eight,” he shouted, “and I'm in the chair.”

Mrs. Preston, breathless and exclaiming, hurried across to him.

“Oh, you naughty boy... death of cold... in your nightshirt.”

“I'm eight,” he said, looking at her scornfully, “and I can sit here as

long as I please.”

Helen, her pigtails flapping on either shoulder, her nose red, as it

always was early in the morning, appeared at the opposite end of the

nursery.

“Nurse, he mustn't, must he? Tell him not to. I don't care how old you

are. It's my chair. Mother said--”

“No, she didn't. Mother said--”

“Yes, she did. Mother said--”

“Mother said that when--”

“Oh, you story. You know that Mother said--” Then suddenly a new,

stiffening, trusting dignity filled him, as though he had with a turn of

the head discovered himself in golden armour.

He was above this vulgar wrangling now. That was for girls. He was

superior to them all. He got down from the chair and stood, his head

up, on the old Turkey rug (red with yellow cockatoos) in front of the

roaring fire.

“You may have your old chair,” he said to Helen. “I'm eight now, and I

don't want it any more... although if I do want it I shall have it,” he

added.

He was a small, square boy with a pug-nosed face. His hair was light

brown, thin and stiff, so that it was difficult to brush, and although

you watered it, stood up in unexpected places and stared at you. His

eyes were good, dark brown and large, but he was in no way handsome; his

neck, his nose ridiculous. His mouth was too large, and his chin stuck

out like a hammer.

He was, plainly, obstinate and possibly sulky, although when he smiled

his whole face was lighted with humour. Helen was the only beautiful

Cole child, and she was abundantly aware of that fact. The Coles had

never been a good-looking family.

He stood in front of the fireplace now as he had seen his father do, his

short legs apart, his head up, and his hands behind his back.

“Now, Master Jeremy,” the Jampot continued, “you may be eight years old,

but it isn't a reason for disobedience the very first minute, and, of

course, your bath is ready and you catching your death with naked feet,

which you've always been told to put your slippers on and not to keep

the bath waiting, when there's Miss Helen and Miss Mary, as you very

well know, and breakfast coming in five minutes, which there's sausages

this morning, because it's your birthday, and them all getting cold--”

“Sausages!”

He was across the floor in a moment, had thrown off his nightshirt and

was in his bath. Sausages! He was translated into a world of excitement

and splendour. They had sausages so seldom, not always even on

birthdays, and to-day, on a cold morning, with a crackling fire and

marmalade, perhaps--and then all the presents.

Oh, he was happy. As he rubbed his back with the towel a wonderful

glowing Christian charity spread from his head to his toes and tingled

through every inch of him. Helen should sit in the chair when she

pleased; Mary should be allowed to dress and undress the large woollen

dog, known as “Sulks,” his own especial and beloved property, so often

as she wished; Jampot should poke the twisted end of the towel in his

ears and brush his hair with the hard brushes, and he would not say a

word. Aunt Mary should kiss him (as, of course, she would want to do),

and he would not shiver; he would (bravest deed of all) allow Mary to

read “Alice in Wonderland” in her sing-sing voice so long as ever she

wanted... Sausages! Sausages!

In his shirt and his short blue trousers, his hair on end, tugging at

his braces, he stood in the doorway and shouted:

“Helen, there are sausages--because it's my birthday. Aren't you glad?”

And even when the only response to his joyous invitation was Helen's

voice crossly admonishing the Jampot: “Oh, you do pull so; you're

hurting!”--his charity was not checked.

Then when he stood clothed and of a cheerful mind once more in front of

the fire a shyness stole over him. He knew that the moment for Presents

was approaching; he knew that very shortly he would have to kiss and be

kissed by a multitude of persons, that he would have to say again and

again, “Oh, thank you, thank you so much!” that he would have his usual

consciousness of his inability to thank anybody at all in the way that

they expected to be thanked. Helen and Mary never worried about such

things. They delighted in kissing and hugging and multitudes of words.

If only he might have had his presents by himself and then stolen out

and said “Thank you” to the lot of them and have done with it.

He watched the breakfast-table with increasing satisfaction--the large

teapot with the red roses, the dark blue porridge plates, the glass jar

with the marmalade a rich yellow inside it, the huge loaf with the

soft pieces bursting out between the crusty pieces, the solid square of

butter, so beautiful a colour and marked with a large cow and a tree on

the top (he had seen once in the kitchen the wooden shape with which

the cook made this handsome thing). There were also his own silver mug,

given him at his christening by Canon Trenchard, his godfather, and his

silver spoon, given him on the same occasion by Uncle Samuel.

All these things glittered and glowed in the firelight, and a kettle was

singing on the hob and Martha the canary was singing in her cage in

the window. (No one really knew whether the canary were a lady or a

gentleman, but the name had been Martha after a beloved housemaid, now

married to the gardener, and the sex had followed the name.)

There were also all the other familiar nursery things. The hole in the

Turkey carpet near the bookcase, the rocking-horse, very shiny where you

sit and very Christmas-tree-like as to its tail; the doll's house, now

deserted, because Helen was too old and Mary too clever; the pictures

of “Church on Christmas Morning” (everyone with their mouths very wide

open, singing a Christmas hymn, with holly), “Dignity and Impudence,”

after Landseer, “The Shepherds and the Angels,” and “The Charge of the

Light Brigade.” So packed was the nursery with history for Jeremy that

it would have taken quite a week to relate it all. There was the

spot where he had bitten the Jampot's fingers, for which deed he had

afterwards been slippered by his father; there the corner where they

stood for punishment (he knew exactly how many ships with sails, how

many ridges of waves, and how many setting suns there were on that

especial piece of corner wallpaper--three ships, twelve ridges, two and

a half suns); there was the place where he had broken the ink bottle

over his shoes and the carpet, there by the window, where Mary had read

to him once when he had toothache, and he had not known whether her

reading or the toothache agonised him the more; and so on, an endless

sequence of sensational history.

His reminiscences were cut short by the appearance of Gladys with the

porridge. Gladys, who was only the between-maid, but was nevertheless

stout, breathless from her climb and the sentiment of the occasion,

produced from a deep pocket a dirty envelope, which she laid upon the

table.

“Many 'appy returns, Master Jeremy.” Giggle... giggle... “Lord save

us if I 'aven't gone and forgotten they spunes,” and she vanished. The

present-giving had begun.

He had an instant's struggle as to whether it were better to wait

until all the presents had accumulated, or whether he would take them

separately as they arrived. The dirty envelope lured him. He advanced

towards it and seized it. He could not read very easily the sprawling

writing on the cover, but he guessed that it said “From Gladys to Master

Jeremy.” Within was a marvellous card, tied together with glistening

cord and shining with all the colours of the rainbow. It was apparently

a survival from last Christmas, as there was a church in snow and a peal

of bells; he was, nevertheless, very happy to have it.

After his introduction events moved swiftly. First Helen and Mary

appeared, their faces shining and solemn and mysterious--Helen

self-conscious and Mary staring through her spectacles like a profound

owl.

Because Jeremy had known Mary ever since he could remember, he was

unaware that there was anything very peculiar about her. But in truth

she was a strange looking child. Very thin, she had a large head,

with big outstanding ears, spectacles, and yellow hair pulled back

and “stringy.” Her large hands were always red, and her forehead was

freckled. She was as plain a child as you were ever likely to see, but

there was character in her mouth and eyes, and although she was only

seven years old, she could read quite difficult books (she was engaged

at this particular time upon “Ivanhoe”), and she was a genius at sums.

The passion of her life, as the family were all aware, was Jeremy,

but it was an unfortunate and uncomfortable passion. She bothered and

worried him, she was insanely jealous; she would sulk for days did he

ever seem to prefer Helen to herself. No one understood her; she was

considered a “difficult child,” quite unlike any other member of the

family, except possibly Samuel, Mr. Cole's brother-in-law, who was an

unsuccessful painter and therefore “odd.”

As Mary was at present only seven years of age it would be too much to

say that the family was afraid of her. Aunt Amy's attitude was: “Well,

after all, she's sure to be clever when she grows up, poor child;” and

although the parishioners of Mary's father always alluded to her as “the

ludicrous Cole child,” they told awed little stories about the infant's

mental capacities, and concluded comfortably, “I'm glad Alice (or Jane

or Matilda or Anabel) isn't clever like that. They overwork when they

are young, and then when they grow up--”

Meanwhile Mary led her private life. She attached herself to no one

but Jeremy; she was delicate and suffered from perpetual colds; she

therefore spent much of her time in the nursery reading, her huge

spectacles close to the page, her thin legs like black sticks stuck

up on the fender in front of the fire or curled up under her on the

window-seat.

Very different was Helen. Helen had a mass of dark black hair, big black

eyes with thick eye-lashes, a thin white neck, little feet, and already

an eye to “effects” in dress. She was charming to strangers, to the

queer curates who haunted the family hall, to poor people and rich

people, to old people and young people. She was warm-hearted but not

impulsive, intelligent but not clever, sympathetic but not sentimental,

impatient but never uncontrolled. She liked almost everyone and almost

everything, but no one and nothing mattered to her very deeply; she

liked going to church, always learnt her Collect first on Sunday, and

gave half her pocket-money to the morning collection. She was generous

but never extravagant, enjoyed food but was not greedy. She was quite

aware that she was pretty and might one day be beautiful, and she was

glad of that, but she was never silly about her looks.

When Aunt Amy, who was always silly about everything, said in her

presence to visitors, “Isn't Helen the loveliest thing you ever saw?”

she managed by her shy self-confidence to suggest that she was pretty,

that Aunt Amy was a fool, and life was altogether very agreeable, but

that none of these things was of any great importance. She was very good

friends with Jeremy, but she played no part in his life at all. At

the same time she often fought with him, simply from her real deep

consciousness of her superiority to him. She valued her authority

and asserted it incessantly. That authority had until last year been

unchallenged, but Jeremy now was growing. She had, although she did not

as yet realise it, a difficult time before her.

Helen and Mary advanced with their presents, laid them on the

breakfast-table, and then retreated to watch the effect of it all.

“Shall I now?” asked Jeremy.

“Yes, now,” said Helen and Mary.

There were three parcels, one large and “shoppy,” two small and bound

with family paper, tied by family hands with family string. He grasped

immediately the situation. The shoppy parcel was bought with mother's

money and only “pretended” to be from his sisters; the two small parcels

were the very handiwork of the ladies themselves, the same having been

seen by all eyes at work for the last six months, sometimes, indeed,

under the cloak of attempted secrecy, but more often--because weariness

or ill-temper made them careless--in the full light of day.

His interest was centred almost entirely in the “shoppy” parcel, which

by its shape might be “soldiers”; but he knew the rules of the game,

and disregarding the large, ostentatious brown-papered thing, he went

magnificently for the two small incoherent bundles.

He opened them. A flat green table-centre with a red pattern of roses, a

thick table-napkin ring worked in yellow worsted, these were revealed.

“Oh!” he cried, “just what I wanted.” (Father always said that on his

birthday.)

“Is it?” said Mary and Helen.

“Mine's the ring,” said Mary. “It's dirty rather, but it would have

got dirty, anyway, afterwards.” She watched anxiously to see whether he

preferred Helen's.

He watched them nervously, lest he should be expected to kiss them. He

wiped his mouth with his hand instead, and began rapidly to talk:

“Jampot will know now which mine is. She's always giving me the wrong

one. I'll have it always, and the green thing too.”

“It's for the middle of a table,” Helen interrupted.

“Yes, I know,” said Jeremy hurriedly. “I'll always have it too--like

Mary's--when I'm grown up and all.... I say, shall I open the other one

now?”

“Yes, you can,” said Helen and Mary, ceasing to take the central place

in the ceremony, spectators now and eagerly excited.

But Mary had a last word.

“You do like mine, don't you?”

“Of course, like anything.”

She wanted to say “Better than Helen's?” but restrained herself.

“I was ever so long doing it; I thought I wouldn't finish it in time.”

He saw with terror that she meditated a descent upon him; a kiss was in

the air. She moved forward; then, to his extreme relief, the door opened

and the elders arriving saved him.

There were Father and Mother, Uncle Samuel and Aunt Amy, all with

presents, faces of birthday tolerance and “do-as-you-please-to-day,

dear” expressions.

The Rev. Herbert Cole was forty years of age, rector of St. James's,

Polchester, during the last ten years, and marked out for greater

preferment in the near future. To be a rector at thirty is unusual,

but he had great religious gifts, preached an admirable “as-man-to-man”

sermon, and did not believe in thinking about more than he could see. He

was an excellent father in the abstract sense, but the parish absorbed

too much of his time to allow of intimacies with anyone.

Mrs. Cole was the most placid lady in Europe. She had a comfortable

figure, but was not stout, here a dimple and there a dimple. Nothing

could disturb her. Children, servants, her husband's sermons, district

visiting, her Tuesday “at homes,” the butcher, the dean's wife, the

wives of the canons, the Polchester climate, bills, clothes, other

women's clothes--over all these rocks of peril in the sea of daily life

her barque happily floated. Some ill-natured people thought her stupid,

but in her younger days she had liked Trollope's novels in the Cornhill,

disapproved placidly of “Jane Eyre,” and admired Tennyson, so that she

could not be considered unliterary.

She was economical, warm-hearted, loved her children, talked only the

gentlest scandal, and was a completely happy woman--all this in the

placidest way in the world. Miss Amy Trefusis, her sister, was very

different, being thin both in her figure and her emotions. She skirted

tempestuously over the surface of things, was the most sentimental of

human beings, was often in tears over reminiscences of books or the

weather, was deeply religious in a superficial way, and really--although

she would have been entirely astonished had you told her so--cared for

no one in the world but herself. She was dressed always in dark colours,

with the high shoulders of the day, elegant bonnets and little chains

that jingled as she moved. In her soul she feared and distrusted

children, but she did not know this. She did know, however, that she

feared and distrusted her brother Samuel.

Her brother Samuel was all that the Trefusis family, as a conservative

body who believed in tradition, had least reason for understanding. He

had been a failure from the first moment of his entry into the Grammar

School in Polchester thirty-five years before this story. He had

continued a failure at Winchester and at Christ Church, Oxford. He had

desired to be a painter; he had broken from the family and gone to

study Art in Paris. He had starved and starved, was at death's door,

was dragged home, and there suddenly had relapsed into Polchester, lived

first on his father, then on his brother-in-law, painted about the town,

painted, made cynical remarks about the Polcastrians, painted, made

blasphemous remarks about the bishop, the dean and all the canons,

painted, and refused to leave his brother-in-law's house. He was a

scandal, of course; he was fat, untidy, wore a blue tam-o'-shanter when

he was “out,” and sometimes went down Orange Street in carpet slippers.

He was a scandal, but what are you to do if a relative is obstinate and

refuses to go? At least make him shave, say the wives of the canons. But

no one had ever made Samuel Trefusis do anything that he did not want to

do. He was sometimes not shaved for three whole days and nights. At any

rate, there he is. It is of no use saying that he does not exist, as

many of the Close ladies try to do. And at least he does not paint

strange women; he prefers flowers and cows and the Polchester woods,

although anything less like cows, flowers and woods, Mrs. Sampson, wife

of the Dean, who once had a water-colour in the Academy, says she has

never seen. Samuel Trefusis is a failure, and, what is truly awful, he

does not mind; nobody buys his pictures and he does not care; and, worst

taste of all, he laughs at his relations, although he lives on them.

Nothing further need be said.

To Helen, Mary and Jeremy he had always been a fascinating object,

although they realised, with that sharp worldly wisdom to be found in

all infants of tender years, that he was a failure, a dirty man, and

disliked children. He very rarely spoke to them; was once quite wildly

enraged when Mary was discovered licking his paints. (It was the paints

he seemed anxious about, not in the least the poor little thing's

health, as his sister Amy said), and had publicly been heard to say that

his brother-in-law had only got the children he deserved.

Nevertheless Jeremy had always been interested in him. He liked his fat

round shape, his rough, untidy grey hair, his scarlet slippers, his blue

tam-o'-shanter, the smudges of paint sometimes to be discovered on his

cheeks, and the jingling noises he made in his pocket with his money. He

was certainly more fun than Aunt Amy.

There, then, they all were with their presents and their birthday faces.

“Shall I undo them for you, darling?” of course said Aunt Amy. Jeremy

shook his head (he did not say what he thought of her) and continued to

tug at the string. He was given a large pair of scissors. He received

(from Father) a silver watch, (from Mother) a paint-box, a dark blue and

gold prayer book with a thick squashy leather cover (from Aunt Amy).

He was in an ecstasy. How he had longed for a watch, just such a

turnip-shaped one, and a paint-box. What colours he could make! Even

Aunt Amy's prayer book was something, with its squashy cover and silk

marker (only why did Aunt Amy never give him anything sensible?). He

stood there, his face flushed, his eyes sparkling, the watch in one hand

and the paint-box in the other. Remarks were heard like: “You mustn't

poke it with, your finger, Jerry darling, or you'll break the hands

off”; and “I thought he'd, better have the square sort, and not the

tubes. They're so squashy”; and “You'll be able to learn your Collect so

easily with that big print, Jerry dear. Very kind of you, Amy.”

Meanwhile he was aware that Uncle Samuel had given him nothing. There

was a little thick catch of disappointment in his throat, not because

he wanted a present, but because he liked Uncle Samuel. Suddenly, from

somewhere behind him his uncle said: “Shut your eyes, Jerry. Don't open

them until I tell you”--then rather crossly, “No, Amy, leave me alone. I

know what I'm about, thank you.”

Jeremy shut his eyes tight. He closed them so that the eyelids seemed to

turn right inwards and red lights flashed. He stood there for at least

a century, all in darkness, no one saying anything save that once Mary

cried “Oh!” and clapped her hands, which same cry excited him to such

a pitch that he would have dug his nails into his hands had he not so

consistently in the past bitten them that there were no nails with which

to dig. He waited. He waited. He waited. He was not eight, he was eighty

when at last Uncle Samuel said, “Now you may look.”

He opened his eyes and turned; for a moment the nursery, too, rocked in

the unfamiliar light. Then he saw. On the middle of the nursery carpet

was a village, a real village, six houses with red roofs, green windows

and white porches, a church with a tower and a tiny bell, an orchard

with flowers on the fruit trees, a green lawn, a street with a butcher's

shop, a post office, and a grocer's. Villager Noah, Mrs. Noah and the

little Noahs, a field with cows, horses, dogs, a farm with chickens and

even two pigs...

He stood, he stared, he drew a deep breath.

“It comes all the way from Germany,” said Aunt Amy, who always made

things uninteresting if she possibly could.

There was much delighted talk. Jeremy said nothing. But Uncle Samuel

understood.

“Glad you like it,” he said, and left the room.

“Aren't you pleased?” said Helen.

Jeremy still said nothing.

“Sausages. Sausages!” cried Mary, as Gladys, grinning, entered with a

dish of a lovely and pleasant smell. But Jeremy did not turn. He simply

stood there--staring.

III

It is of the essence of birthdays that they cannot maintain throughout

a long day the glorious character of their early dawning. In Polchester

thirty years ago there were no cinematographs, no theatre save for

an occasional amateur performance at the Assembly Rooms and, once and

again, a magic-lantern show. On this particular day, moreover, Mr. and

Mrs. Cole were immensely busied with preparations for some parochial

tea. Miss Trefusis had calls to make, and, of course, Uncle Samuel was

invisible. The Birthday then suddenly became no longer a birthday but

an ordinary day--with an extraordinary standard. This is why so many

birthdays end in tears.

But Jeremy, as was usual with him, took everything quietly. He might cry

aloud about such an affair as the conquest of the wicker chair because

that did not deeply matter to him, but about the real things he was

silent. The village was one of the real things; during all the morning

he remained shut up in his soul with it, the wide world closed off from

them by many muffled doors. How had Uncle Samuel known that he had deep

in his own inside, so deep that he had not mentioned it even to himself,

wanted something just like this? Thirty years ago there were none of the

presents that there are for children now--no wonderful railways that

run round the nursery from Monte Carlo to Paris with all the stations

marked; no dolls that are so like fashionable women that you are given a

manicure set with them to keep their nails tidy; no miniature motor-cars

that run of themselves and go for miles round the floor without being

wound up. Jeremy knew none of these things, and was the happier that he

did not. To such a boy such a village was a miracle.... It had not come

from Germany, as Aunt Amy said, but from heaven. But it was even more

of Uncle Samuel than the village that he was thinking. When they

started--Helen, Mary and he in charge of the Jampot--upon their

afternoon walk, he was still asking himself the same questions. How had

Uncle Samuel known so exactly? Had it been a great trouble to bring from

so far away? Had Uncle Samuel thought it bad of him not to thank him?

He was lost in such considerations when the Jampot inquired of him the

way that their walk should take--it was his choice because it was his

Birthday. He had no choice. There was one walk that far exceeded all

others in glory, straight down Orange Street, straight again through the

Market, past the Assembly Rooms and the Town Hall, past the flower and

fruit stalls, and the old banana woman under the green umbrella and

the toy stall with coloured balloons, the china dogs and the nodding

donkeys, up the High Street, into the cobble-stones of the Close, whence

one could look down, between the houses on to the orchards, round the

Cathedral with the meadows, Pol Meads sloping down to the river, so

through Orchard Lane into Orange Street once again.

Such a walk combined every magic and delight known to the heart of man,

but it was not generally allowed, because Jeremy would drag past the

shops, the stalls in the Market Place and the walk behind the Cathedral,

whence one might sometimes see boats on the river, sheep and cows in the

meads, and, in their proper season, delight of delights--lambs.

They set out...

Thirty years ago the winter weather in Polchester was wonderful. Now,

of course, there are no hard winters, no frost, no snow, no waits, no

snowmen, and no skating on the Pol. Then there were all those things.

To-day was of a hard, glittering frost; the sun, like a round, red

lacquer tray, fell heavily, slowly through a faint pale sky that was

not strong enough to sustain it. The air had the cold, sweet twang of

peppermints in the throat. Polchester was a painted town upon a blue

screen, the Cathedral towers purple against the sky; the air was scented

with burning leaves, and cries from the town rose up clear and hard,

lingering and falling like notes of music. Somewhere they were playing

football, and the shouting was distant and regular like the tramp of

armed men. “Three” struck the Cathedral clock, as though it were calling

“Open Sesame.” Other lesser clocks repeated the challenge cry through

the town. “Woppley--Woppley--Why!” sung the man who was selling skins

down Orange Street. The sky, turning slowly from blue to gold, shone

mysteriously through the glass of the street lamps, and the sun began to

wrap itself in tints of purple and crocus and iris.

“Woppley--Woppley--Why!” screamed the skin-man suddenly appearing at the

top of the street.

“Now 'urry, Master Jeremy,” said the Jampot, “or we shall never get

'ome this night, and I might have known you'd choose the longest walk

possible. Come along, Miss Mary, now--none of that dawdling.”

Jeremy, in his H.M.S. Adventure's cap and rough blue navy coat, felt

himself superior to the Jampot, so he only said, “Oh, don't bother,

Nurse,” and then in the same breath, “I'll run you down the hill, Mary,”

and before anyone could say a word there they were at the bottom of

Orange Street, as though they had fallen into a well. The sun was gone,

the golden horizon was gone--only the purple lights began to gather

about their feet and climb slowly the high black houses.

Mary liked this, because she now had Jeremy to herself. She began

hurriedly, so that she should lose no time:

“Shall I tell you a story, Jeremy? I've got a new one. Once upon a time

there were three little boys, and they lived in a wood, and an old witch

ate them, and the Princess who had heaps of jewellery and a white horse

and a lovely gold dress came, and it was snowing and the witch--”

This was always Mary's way. She loved to tell Jeremy interesting

stories, and he did not mind because he did not listen and could

meanwhile think his own thoughts.

His chief decision arrived at as he marched along was that he would keep

the village to himself; no one else should put their fingers into it,

arrange the orchard with the coloured trees, decide upon the names of

the Noah family, settle the village street in its final order, ring

the bell of the church, or milk the cows. He alone would do all these

things. And, so considering, he seemed to himself very like God. God,

he supposed, could pull Polchester about, root out a house here, another

there, knock the Assembly Rooms down and send a thunderbolt on to the

apple woman's umbrella. Well, then--so could he with his village. He

walked swollen with pride. He arrived at the first Island of Circe,

namely, the window of Mr. Thompson, the jeweller in Market Street,

pressed his nose to the pane, and refused to listen when the Jampot

suggested that he should move forward.

He could see the diamonds like drops of water in the sun, and the pearls

like drops of milk, and the rubies like drops of blood, but it was not

of diamonds, pearls or rubies that he was thinking--he thought only of

his village. He would ring the church bell, and then all the Noah family

should start out of the door, down the garden, up the village street...

It did not matter if one of the younger Noahs should be lazy and wish to

stay at home beneath the flowering trees of the orchard. She would not

be allowed... He was as God.. . He was as God... The butcher should

go (if he was not stuck to his shop), and even some of his cows might

go.... He was as God...

He heard Mary's voice in his ear.

“And after that they all ate chocolates with white cream and red cream,

and they sucked it off pins, and there were hard bits and soft bits, and

the Princess (she was a frog now. You remember, don't you, Jeremy? The

witch turned her) hotted the oven like cook has, with black doors, and

hotted it and hotted it, but suddenly there was a noise--”

And, on the other side, the Jampot's voice: “You naughty boy, stoppin'

'ere for everyone to see, just because it's your birthday, which I wish

there wasn't no birthdays, nor there wouldn't be if I had my way.”

Jeremy turned from Mr. Thompson's window, a scornful smile on his face:

“I'm bigger'n you, Nurse,” he said. “If I said out loud, 'I won't go,' I

wouldn't go, and no one could make me.”

“Well, come along, then,” said Nurse.

“Don't be so stupid, Jerry,” said Helen calmly. “If a policeman came and

said you had to go home you'd have to go.”

“No I wouldn't,” said Jeremy.

“Then they'd put you in prison.”

“They could.”

“They'd hang you, perhaps.”

“They could,” replied Jeremy.

Farther than this argument cannot go, so Helen shrugged her shoulders

and said: “You are silly.”

And they all moved forward.

He found then that this new sense or God-like power detracted a little

from the excitements of the Market Place, although the flower-stall was

dazzling with flowers; there was a new kind of pig that lifted its tail

and lowered it again on the toy stall, and the apple-woman was as fat as

ever and had thick clumps of yellow bananas hanging most richly around

her head. They ascended the High Street and reached the Close. It was

half-past three, and the Cathedral bells had begun to ring for evensong.

All the houses in the Close were painted with a pale yellow light;

across the long green Cathedral lawn thin black shadows like the fingers

of giants pointed to the Cathedral door. All was so silent here that the

bells danced against the houses and back again, the echoes lingering in

the high elms and mingling with the placid cooing of the rooks.

“There's Mrs. Sampson,” said Jeremy. “Aunt Amy says she's a wicked

woman. Do you think she's a wicked woman, Nurse?” He gazed at the stout

figure with interest. If he were truly God he would turn her into a

rabbit. This thought amused him, and he began to laugh.

“You naughty boy; now come along, do,” said the Jampot, who distrusted

laughter in Jerry.

“I'll ring the bells when I grow up,” he said, “and I'll ring them in

the middle of the night, so that everyone will have to go to church when

they don't want to. I'll be able to do what I like when I grow up.”

“No, you won't,” said Helen. “Father and Mother can't do what they

like.”

“Yes they can,” said Jeremy.

“No they can't,” answered Helen, “or they would.”

“So they do,” said Jeremy--“silly.”

“Silly yourself,” said Helen very calmly, because she knew very well

that she was not silly.

“Now, children, stop it, do,” said the Jampot.

Jeremy's sense of newly received power reached its climax when they

walked round the Close and reached the back of the Cathedral. I know

that now, both for Jeremy and me, that prospect has dwindled into

its proper grown-up proportions, but how can a man, be he come to

threescore and ten and more, ever forget the size, the splendour, the

stupendous extravagance of that early vision?

Jeremy saw that day the old fragment of castle wall, the green expanse

falling like a sheeted waterfall from the Cathedral heights, the blue

line of river flashing in the evening sun between the bare-boughed

trees, the long spaces of black shadow spreading slowly over the colour,

as though it were all being rolled up and laid away for another day;

the brown frosty path of the Rope Walk, the farther bank climbing into

fields and hedges, ending in the ridge of wood, black against the golden

sky. And all so still! As the children stood there they could catch

nestlings' faint cries, stirrings of dead leaves and twigs, as birds

and beasts moved to their homes; the cooing of the rooks about the black

branches seemed to promise that this world should be for ever tranquil,

for ever cloistered and removed; the sun, red and flaming above the dark

wood, flung white mists hither and thither to veil its departure. The

silence deepened, the last light flamed on the river and died upon the

hill.

“Now, children, come along do,” said the Jampot who had been held

in spite of herself, and would pay for it, she knew, in rheumatism

to-morrow. It was then that Jeremy's God-flung sense of power, born

from that moment early in the day when he had sat in the wicker chair,

reached its climax. He stood there, his legs apart, looking upon the

darkening world and felt that he could do anything--anything...

At any rate, there was one thing that he could do, disobey the Jampot.

“I'm not coming,” he said, “till I choose.”

“You wicked boy!” she cried, her temper rising with the evening chills,

her desire for a cup of hot tea, and an aching longing for a comfortable

chair. “When everyone's been so good to you to-day and the things you've

been given and all--why, it's a wicked shame.”

The Jampot, who was a woman happily without imagination, saw a naughty

small boy spoiled and needing the slipper.

A rook, taking a last look at the world before retiring to rest,

watching from his leafless bough, saw a mortal spirit defying the

universe, and sympathised with it.

“I shall tell your mother,” said the Jampot. “Now come, Master Jeremy,

be a good boy.”

“Oh, don't bother, Nurse,” he answered impatiently. “You're such a

fuss.”

She realised in that moment that he was suddenly beyond her power, that

he would never be within it again. She had nursed him for eight years,

she had loved him in her own way; she, dull perhaps in the ways of

the world, but wise in the ways of nurses, ways that are built up of

surrender and surrender, gave him, then and there, to the larger life...

“You may behave as you like, Master Jeremy,” she said. “It won't be for

long that I'll have the dealing with you, praise be. You'll be going to

school next September, and then we'll see what'll happen to your wicked

pride.”

“School!” he turned upon her, his eyes wide and staring.

“School!” he stared at them all.

The world tumbled from him. In his soul was a confusion of triumph and

dismay, of excitement and loneliness, of the sudden falling from him of

all old standards, old horizons, of pride and humility... How little

now was the Village to him. He looked at them to see whether they could

understand. They could not.

Very quietly he followed them home. His birthday had achieved its

climax...

Jeremy · 第 1 / 12 章