_Enter two +Footmen+, bearing the frame of a great
picture. Curtains drawn._
+1st Foot.+ Set 'em down gently; so.
+2d Foot.+ They make me sweat.
Pictures, quoth you; 'slight, they have weight enough
To be the parties.
+1st Foot.+ My lady, sir, has sent
A present to your wife.
+Ware.+ What lady, pray?
+1st Foot.+ Madam Aurelia, sir.
+Ware.+ O!----
+2d Foot.+ Sir, they are
A brace of pictures, with which my lady prays
She will adorn her chamber.
+Ware.+ Male pictures, pray,
Or female?
+1st Foot.+ Why d'you ask?
+Ware.+ Because, methinks,
It should be Mars and Venus in a net;
Aretine's postures,[261] or a naked nymph
Lying asleep, and some lascivious satyr
Taking her lineaments. These are pictures which
Delight my wife.
+2d Foot.+ These are night-pieces, sir.
+Mis. Hol.+ Lord, how I long to see 'em! I have at home
The finest ravish'd Lucrece.
+Mis. Scr.+ So have I
The finest fall of Babylon! There is
A fat monk spewing churches, save your presence.
+Mis. Hol.+ Pray, will you open 'em?
+1st Foot.+ My lady charged us
None should have sight of 'em, sir, but your wife.
+Ware.+ Because you make so dainty, I will see 'em.
[_Draws the curtain; within are
discovered +Bright+ and +Newcut+._
+2d Foot.+ 'Tis out of our commission.
+Ware.+ But not of mine. Hell and damnation!
+1st Foot.+ How do you like 'em, sir?
+Mis. Hol.+ Look, they are pictur'd in their clothes!
+Mis. Sea.+ They stir, too.
+2d Foot.+ Sir, they are drawn to life; a master's hand
Went to 'em, I assure you.
+Ware.+ Out, varlets, bawds!
Panders, avoid my house! O devil! are you
My wife's night-pieces? [_They come out._
+Bright.+ Sir, you are rude, uncivil,
And would be beaten.
+New.+ We cannot come in private
On business to your wife, but you must be
Inquisitive. Sir, thank God 'tis in your own house;
The place protects you.
+Bright.+ If such an insolence
'Scape unreveng'd, henceforth no ladies shall
Have secret servants.
+New.+ Here she comes; we'll ask
If she gave you commission to be so bold.
+Ware.+ Why this is far beyond example rare.
Now I conceive what is Platonic love:
'Tis to have men, like pictures, brought disguised,
To cuckold us with virtue. [_They whisper._