JOANNA TANGLES HER SKEIN.
"A child of our grandmother Eve, a female; or, for thy more sweet
understanding, a woman."
SHAKESPEARE.
"Men are born with two eyes, but with one tongue, in order that
they should see twice as much as they say."
COLTON.
The house in High Street where the Chaytors lived was somewhat dingy and
uninviting in its outward aspect, but inside it was not without its
advantages.
A small paved court separated it from the street; and at night its front
windows were illuminated by the flaring gaslights from the opposite
shops. All day long the ceaseless patter of foot-passengers on the
pavement, and the rumble and rattle of cabs, omnibuses, and carts, made
the narrow windows shake in their frames. And it was far into the night
before silence brooded over the old town.
On one side of the passage was a small room where Thorold kept a good
many of his books and papers. It was called the study, but he never sat
there. Joanna had long ago proved to him that with one servant and a
limited purse, an extra fire would be quite a sinful extravagance. It
was for this reason too that she so seldom used her drawing-room. It was
a pretty room on the first floor, with a pleasant view of the garden,
and in summer she liked to sit at the open window with her work, and
watch Thorold digging and raking in the borders. Gardening was his
favourite amusement, and he took great pride in his flower-beds.
Sometimes, when she had leisure, Joanna would weed or water a little;
but she always made much of these labours.
The room they mostly used was a large one on the ground floor. It
extended from the front to the back of the house, and the two narrow
windows at the farther end overlooked the shady old garden.
This part of the room was furnished as a study. The stained book-shelves
were loaded with ponderous-looking books. A writing-table occupied one
window, and two comfortable easy-chairs, and Joanna's overflowing
work-basket, stood on either side of the fireplace. A book-stand and a
reading-lamp were by Thorold's chair; the front portion of the room was
used for their meals.
When Thorold came down that evening the room looked warm and cosy. The
crimson curtains were drawn, and a bright fire blazed cheerfully. The
supper was laid, and Jemima had just brought in a small, covered dish,
and placed it before her mistress. Thorold was hungry, for his luncheon
had been a light one. For a wonder, the chops were well cooked and hot;
and as he helped himself to the nicely browned mashed potatoes, he felt
disposed to enjoy himself. He would tell Joanna about his visit to
Murdoch & Williams. She would be interested; and for once they would
have a sociable evening. He even thought that he would ask for a cup of
coffee, as he felt chilled and tired. And then, by way of making himself
pleasant, he commended Jemima's cookery.
It was an unfortunate choice of subjects. Joanna, who had been
tranquilly eating her supper, suddenly grew red and querulous.
"Ah, she can cook well enough if she chooses," she returned, "but there!
she so seldom chooses to take pains. Thorold, I shall have to part with
that girl; her wastefulness and extravagance are beyond everything. And
then she is so self-willed, too--she will not mind anything I tell her.
Again and again I have begged her not to put an egg in the rice pudding,
but she does it all the same."
"I suppose she thinks the egg will make the pudding nicer," returned
Thorold, mildly; and then, to change the subject, he said, boldly, "I
have rather a headache this evening, dear. Do you think Jemima could
make me a cup of coffee?"
"She could make it, but I doubt if you would care to drink it," she
returned, fretfully. "And she wants to go out, too. She has got a young
man, I know she has; I taxed her with it this very morning, and she was
as impertinent as possible."
"My dear Joa"--for his sense of fairness was roused by this--"why should
not the poor girl have a lover? She is very good-looking, and as long as
she conducts herself properly I can see no objection to the young man."
"Yes, and she will be having him in, and giving him supper when we are
out--not that I ever do go out, Heaven knows! I declare I quite envy
you, Thorold, going out every morning to your work. Women's lives are
far more dull and monotonous than men's;" here Joanna's voice waxed more
plaintive than ever--it was naturally rather a sweet voice, but
fretfulness and discontent had deadened the harmony. If, as they say,
the closing of an eyelid will shut out the lustre of a planet, so, to
Joanna, the small everyday worries seemed to obliterate the larger and
grander interests of life. Jemima's good looks, her lover, her small
impertinences and misdemeanours, loomed like gigantic shadows on her
horizon. "If she could only learn the right proportion of things!"
Thorold had said once to Althea, almost in despair.
When Joanna made her dolorous little speech, Thorold raised his eyes
from his plate and looked at her. "Why do you not go to the Red House
oftener?" he asked, gravely. "You know how glad they would be to have
you. You stay at home too much, Joa, but it is your own fault, you know.
Doreen and Althea are always sending you invitations."
"Yes, I know, and I am very fond of Althea. But somehow I never care to
go to the Red House; it reminds me too much of the dear old Manor House.
That room of Althea's makes me quite shiver when I enter it."
"Oh, I would not give way to those feelings, Joa," he returned, hastily.
"In life one has to harden one's self to all sorts of things, and it is
no use moping and brooding over troubles that cannot be altered. If
Jemima wants to go out, perhaps we had better not wait any longer." And
then he lighted his reading lamp, and unfolded his paper. In spite of
the well-cooked chops, supper had certainly not been more festive than
usual.
And then a strange fancy came to Thorold. How would it be with him if
some younger, brighter face were to be opposite to him, evening after
evening. Would not his home, humble as it was, be a very different
place? He knew why he was happier in his chambers at Lincoln's Inn. To
his reserved temperament, solitude was far preferable than uncongenial
fellowship with this small human soul, this weary little pilgrim forever
carrying her heavy pack of worries.
"Poor dear Joa," he said to himself, for his keen eyes had noticed the
reddened eyelids. "Very likely she remembers that it is Tristram's
birthday, and that he is thirty-eight to-day."
Jemima had cleared the table and vanished. He was still alone, and
Rabat-la-Koum was curled up like a huge grey ball at his feet; the
leading article was unusually clever, and absorbed him until a sudden
fragrance pervaded the room, and there stood Joanna at his elbow with a
steaming cup of coffee.
"I waited until Jemima went out, and then I made it myself. It is very
strong coffee, Thorold, and it will do your head good." Joanna's voice
was a little more cheerful as she said this, and the slight flush from
her exertions made her look younger.
Thorold was quite touched; he put out his hand and patted his sister's
arm caressingly. "How good of you to take so much trouble, my dear! I
never thought of the coffee again. Sit down, Joa, and let us be
comfortable. I have been wanting to tell you something all the evening."
"Have you, indeed?" and Joanna brightened. "Wait a moment. I want to
wind some wool. I can hear you talk all the same. And yet I must mention
one thing before you begin. The gas man called for his account, and you
forgot to leave the cheque.''
"Did I? I was in a hurry. But I will write it before I go to bed."
"Thank you. And there is one other thing, Thorold. If Jemima goes at her
month, as she threatens, will she not forfeit her wages? You are a
lawyer, so you ought to know."
"I am quite sure Jemima means to do nothing of the kind," he returned,
impatiently. "Look here, Joa, she is the best servant we have had yet,
and I would rather raise her wages than part with her. Take my advice
for once, praise her a little more and find fault with her a little
less; and if you are wise you will leave her young man alone;" and then
he drank his coffee, moodily. Joanna had quenched his attempt at
conversation again. Joanna pondered Thorold's advice as she unravelled
her skein of yarn; it was somewhat tangled, and as she pulled it with
nervous jerks, the yarn snapped and the ball rolled from her hand.
Thorold suppressed a forcible interjection as he groped under his chair
for the ball. If ever he married, he determined that one of the first
rules he would make for his wife's guidance would be that all
wool-winding should be done by daylight.
Joanna had a tiresome habit of leaving a tangled skein for the
comparative leisure of the evening hours. Thorold used to wonder
sometimes if all her skeins were tangled. It got on his nerves sometimes
and spoilt the enjoyment of his reading. Joanna's limp, nerveless
movements, her jerky beginnings and abrupt endings, her brief spasms of
energy, and the inevitable hunt for the unlucky ball, irritated him at
times beyond endurance. It is quite ridiculous and almost derogatory to
one's dignity to think how much daily life is marred by these small
frets and torments. The buzzing of a bluebottle against the window-pane
is certainly preferable to a brass band when the instruments are
cracked, but the whizzing and fizzing of the insect may in time jar on
the ear; and to thin-skinned people a midge's bite is fruitful of
irritation.
Joanna was making up her mind slowly that her brother had given her good
counsel, and that perhaps it would be well for her to follow it. Thorold
was the master of the house, and if he wished to keep Joanna, of course
the girl must stay. And when Joanna had arrived at this point, she broke
the thread of her yarn again.
"I thought there was something you wanted to tell me, Thorold," she
said, rather reproachfully, when she had found a new beginning. "I have
brought my work and am ready to talk, but you do nothing but read." Then
Thorold threw down his paper impatiently.
"I thought you were too busy with that work," he returned, rather
curtly; "and, after all, it does not matter. It was only about my own
business affairs."
"Oh, but I want to hear it," replied his sister, with much mild
obstinacy. "It is seldom that you do care to talk to me, Thorold;" and
here Joanna's voice was decidedly plaintive. "I sometimes think that if
it were not for finding fault with Jemima I should almost lose the use
of my voice."
Thorold was fast losing patience. Joanna was in one of her most trying
moods; she was at once aggressive and despondent. She was at all times
very tenacious of her sisterly privileges, and nothing offended her more
than being kept in the dark. Well, he might as well get it over and be
done with it; but he would be as brief as possible. "I only wanted to
tell you that I have had a very satisfactory interview with Murdoch &
Williams."
"Oh, indeed"--and here Joanna frowned anxiously over her skein. "They
are solicitors, are they not?"
"Yes, but they are very big people. Joa, I think I am likely to get the
brief. You see"--warming to his subject--"our last case was so
satisfactory, and we got our client such heavy damages, that Murdoch &
Williams were quite pleased. The junior partner made himself very
pleasant, and said all kinds of civil things."
"And you think you will get it, Thorold?" and Joanna actually laid down
her skein.
"I shall certainly get it;" and Thorold's eyes flashed with triumph as
he spoke; at such moments his face was full of expression. "It will be a
big case, Joa, and Sergeant Rivington will be leading counsel on our
side." And then again he told himself that his foot was on the rung of
the ladder, and that he had begun to climb in earnest.
"I am very glad, Theo;" and Joanna's blue eyes were rather tearful. She
and Tristram had often called him Theo, but she seldom used the old pet
name now. Thorold smiled a little sadly as he heard it.
"I knew you would be pleased, dear;" and his voice softened. "It will
make a great difference to our income. Joa, I have made up my mind that
the last of the debts shall be paid off before Christmas, and we will
begin the New Year free and untrammelled. There shall be an end of all
your small peddling economies. We shall not be rich, but at least we
need not hoard our cheese-parings and candle-ends."
"I do not know what you mean, Thorold!" returned Joanna, in a puzzled
tone. "We never use candles except in the coal cellar."
Then Thorold gave a grim, unmirthful laugh. If he ever married, the lady
of his choice should have some sense of humour; nothing is more
harassing and trying to the temper than to have to talk down to the
level of one's daily companion. Althea once said, rather wittily, that
Joa's brains were like a nutmeg-grater--one had to rub one's nutmeg very
hard before the spicy fragments would filter through it.
"Perhaps we may have a better house soon!" he said, after a pause. "I
should like to be out of the town and higher up the hill. The air is
fresher, and it would be quieter."
"Oh, yes, much quieter!" Joanna smiled, and a pretty dimple came into
view; at that moment she looked almost like a girl.
"We must wait for our good things a little," continued Thorold; "but
there is no need for us to stint ourselves. And Joa," here he
hesitated--"why should you not smarten yourself up a bit. Get one or two
new dresses, or any fal-lals you require"--for his keen, observant eyes
had noticed that the old lilac silk that Joanna always wore of an
evening, a relic of the old Manor House days, was faded and darned, and
of obsolete fashion. He was a man who was always keenly alive to the
wants and wishes of his womankind. But even as he made the suggestion,
he wondered why Joanna was hoarding her five hundred pounds, and why she
should not use a few pounds to replenish her scanty wardrobe. He knew,
and had been very angry when he heard it, that Althea had actually
presented her with a beautiful dress, for church; because she said Joa
was too miserly to spend a penny on herself.
Joanna blushed slightly when Thorold made his good-natured proposition.
"You are very kind, Theo," she said, gently, as she folded her white,
nervous-looking hands over her skein, "but I go out so seldom, that I do
not require many new dresses. I have Althea's merino, and"--eyeing her
lilac silk complacently--"there is plenty of wear to be got out of my
old gown yet!"
"Well, you know best," returned Thorold, indifferently. If he had stated
his opinion candidly, he would have suggested that the gown in question
should be relegated to Jemima or the rag-bag. Well, he had done his part
nobly; and now he might take up Guizot's Life. But the next moment
Joanna's plaintive tones arrested him.
"Theo, do you remember what day this is?" And as he nodded, she
continued, mournfully, "Trist is eight-and-thirty to-day; it is actually
ten years since we have seen him--ten long years." And now a slow tear
or two welled down Joanna's face. "What a weary time it has been! And he
and Ella have never written--not a line, not a single word, since their
little girl was born."
"He was going to Australia then, and he seemed to write in good
spirits--we have his letter still, Joa. He was so pleased with his
little daughter, and the prospect of the new berth offered him!"
"Yes, but that was eight or nine years ago. Oh, Thorold, why does he
never write? Do you think he has ceased to care for us?"
"No, my dear, certainly not," replied her brother, kindly; for he was
moved by her deep dejection. "But you know how casual and happy-go-lucky
the dear old chap always was. Bad habits grow stronger as we grow
older--remember that, Joa. Trist never liked making little efforts. He
hated writing letters even in his school days--probably he hates it
still. And yet, for all that, he may be flourishing on some sheep farm
or other."
But this view of the case did not comfort Joanna, and during the rest of
the evening she shed silent tears over her tangled skein. And all the
time, not half a mile away, a man and a child sat hand in hand over a
smoky little cindery fire; the child's shivering form wrapped in an old
Inverness cape.
"Is it always cold in England, father? Why does not Mrs. Grimson make up
a big fire?"
"Well, you see coals are dear, Bet, and the stove is a small one; but my
old coat is warm and thick. Why, you look as snug as a robin in its
nest, or a squirrel in its hole, or a dormouse, or anything else you
like to name. I wonder what Aunt Joa will think of my little Betty when
she sees her?" Then the child laughed gleefully.
"Shall we really find them, father?"
"Of course we shall find them, my girlie; but we must not tire those
poor little feet too much. Put them up on my knee, darling, and dad will
rub them and keep the chilblains away." And then, as he took the tiny
feet in his hand, Bet's thin little arm went round his neck.
"Oh, father, I do love you so. It makes me ache all over to love you so
hard;" and then Bet rested her rough, tangled head against her father's
shoulder.