When dinner is ready the fact is made known to the hostess by the
butler, or maid-servant, who comes to the door and quietly says "Dinner
is served." A bell is never rung for dinner, nor for any other formal
meal.
The host leads the way, taking out the lady who is given the place of
first consideration; the most distinguished woman, the greatest
stranger, the most elderly--whatever the basis of distinction. Other
couples follow in the order assigned to them, each gentleman seating
the lady on his right. The hostess comes last, with the most
distinguished male guest. If there is a footman, or more than one, the
chairs are deftly placed for each guest; but if only a maid is in
waiting, each gentleman arranges his own and his partner's chairs as
quietly as possible.
As soon as the company are seated, each one removes the bread; and the
napkin, partially unfolded, is laid across the lap. It is not tucked
in at the neck or the vest front, or otherwise disposed as a
feeding-bib. It is a towel, for wiping the lips and fingers in
emergencies, but should be used unobtrusively--not flourished like a
flag of truce.