1. A lady should be a lady, and a gentleman a gentleman under any and all
circumstances.
2. FEMALE INDIFFERENCE TO MAN.--There is nothing that affects the nature
and pleasure of man so much as a proper and friendly recognition from a
lady, and as women are more or less dependent upon man's good-will, either
for gain or pleasure, it surely stands to their interest to be reasonably
pleasant and courteous in his presence or society. Indifference is always a
poor investment, whether in society or business.
3. GALLANTRY AND LADYISM should be a prominent feature in the education of
young people. Politeness to ladies cultivates the intellect and refines the
soul, and he who can be easy and entertaining in the society of ladies has
mastered one of the greatest accomplishments. There is nothing taught in
school, academy or college, that contributes so much to the happiness of
man as a full development of his social and moral qualities.
4. LADYLIKE ETIQUETTE.--No woman can afford to treat men rudely. A lady
must have a high intellectual and moral ideal and hold herself above
reproach. She must remember that the art of pleasing and entertaining
gentlemen is infinitely more ornamental than laces, ribbons or diamonds.
Dress and glitter may please man, but it will never benefit him.
5. CULTIVATE DEFICIENCIES.--Men and women poorly sexed treat each other
with more or less indifference, whereas a hearty sexuality inspires both to
a right estimation of the faculties and qualities of each other. Those who
are deficient should seek society and overcome their deficiencies. While
some naturally inherit faculties as entertainers, others are compelled to
acquire them by cultivation. {61}
[Illustration: ASKING AN HONEST QUESTION.]
6. LADIES' SOCIETY.--He who seeks ladies' society should seek an education
and should have a pure heart and a pure mind. Read good, pure and wholesome
literature and study human nature, and you will always be a favorite in the
society circle.
7. WOMAN HATERS.--Some men with little refinement and strong sensual
feelings virtually insult and thereby disgust and repel every female they
meet. They look upon woman with an inherent vulgarity, and doubt the virtue
and integrity of all alike. But it is because they are generally {62}
insincere and impure themselves, and with such a nature culture and
refinement are out of the question, there must be a revolution.
8. MEN HATERS.--Women who look upon all men as odious, corrupt or hateful,
are no doubt so themselves, though they may be clad in silk and sparkle
with diamonds and be as pretty as a lily; but their hypocrisy will out, and
they can never win the heart of a faithful, conscientious and well balanced
man. A good woman has broad ideas and great sympathy. She respects all men
until they are proven unworthy.
9. FOND OF CHILDREN.--The man who is naturally fond of children will make a
good husband and a good father. So it behooves the young man, to notice
children and cultivate the art of pleasing them. It will be a source of
interest, education and permanent benefit to all.
10. EXCESSIVE LUXURY.--Although the association with ladies is an expensive
luxury, yet it is not an expensive education. It elevates, refines,
sanctifies and purifies, and improves the whole man. A young man who has a
pure and genuine respect for ladies, will not only make a good husband, but
a good citizen as well.
11. MASCULINE ATTENTION.--No woman is entitled to any more attention than
her loveliness and ladylike conduct will command. Those who are most
pleasing will receive the most attention, and those who desire more should
aspire to acquire more by cultivating those graces and virtues which
ennoble woman, but no lady should lower or distort her own true ideal, or
smother and crucify her conscience, in order to please any living man. A
good man will admire a good woman, and deceptions cannot long be concealed.
Her show of dry goods or glitter of jewels cannot long cover up her
imperfections or deceptions.
12. PURITY.--Purity of purpose will solve all social problems. Let all
stand on this exalted sexual platform, and teach every man just how to
treat the female sex, and every woman how to behave towards the masculine;
and it will incomparably adorn the manners of both, make both happy in each
other, and mutually develop each other's sexuality and humanity.
[Illustration]
{63}
Practical Rules on Table Manners.
[Illustration]
1. Help ladies with a due appreciation; do not overload the plate of any
person you serve. Never pour gravy on a plate without permission. It spoils
the meat for some persons.
2. Never put anything by force upon any one's plate. It is extremely
ill-bred, though extremely common, to press one to eat of anything.
3. If at dinner you are requested to help any one to sauce or gravy, do not
pour it over the meat or vegetables, but on one side of them. Never load
down a person's plate with anything.
4. As soon as you are helped, begin to eat, or at least begin to occupy
yourself with what you have before you. Do not wait till your neighbors are
served--a custom that was long ago abandoned.
5. Should you, however, find yourself at a table where they have the
old-fashioned steel forks, eat with your knife, as the others do, and do
not let it be seen that you have any objection to doing so.
6. Bread should be broken. To butter a large piece of bread and then bite
it, as children do, is something the knowing never do. {64}
7. In eating game or poultry do not touch the bones with your fingers. To
take a bone in the fingers for the purpose of picking it, is looked upon as
being very inelegant.
8. Never use your own knife or fork to help another. Use rather the knife
or fork of the person you help.
9. Never send your knife or fork, or either of them, on your plate when you
send for second supply.
10. Never turn your elbows out when you use your knife and fork. Keep them
close to your sides.
11. Whenever you use your fingers to convey anything to your mouth or to
remove anything from the mouth, let it be the fingers of the left hand.
12. Tea, coffee, chocolate and the like are drank from the cup and never
from the saucer.
13. In masticating your food, keep your mouth shut; otherwise you will make
a noise that will be very offensive to those around you.
14. Don't attempt to talk with a full mouth. One thing at a time is as much
as any man can do well.