"Thank you, I don't need help. I'm not so badly off as you think. I
make pretty good money, and, anyway, I'm independent, and that's a big
thing."
"But you have to work like a slave. I can't bear to think of that, and
as for being independent, you won't be any the less so if you let me
do things for you. You may go on with your life in your own way. I'll
never interfere or try to dictate to you about anything."
Almost hysterically I cried out:
"Oh, please stop talking about this! Every time you come here you scold
me about something."
"Why, Nora," he said aggrievedly, "I have never asked you to do
anything but this. That's the only thing I ever scolded you about."
"Look how you acted that first night, when you saw me with Lolly and
Mr. Chambers, and then the night I was up with Fred. You wanted to
_beat_ me! I saw it in your face. You could no more help dictating to
and scolding me than you can help coming to see me now."
The last sentence slipped out before I knew it, and he sat up sharply
at that, and then laughed, uncomfortably.
"I am a dog in the manger as far as you are concerned," he said; "but
I'll turn over a new leaf if you'll let me do these things for you."
I smiled ruefully, for I was beginning to know him so well now, and I
sighed. He asked me why I sighed, and then I asked him in turn just why
he wanted to do these things for me. He paused a moment, and then said
slowly, and not without considerable emotion:
"I've told you why before, Nora. I'm interested in you. You're my find,
my discovery. I take a special pride in everything connected with you.
You're the one thing in life I take a real interest in, and I want to
watch you, and see you develop. I haven't the slightest doubt of your
eventual success."
"Hum! You look upon me as a sort of curiosity, don't you?"
"Nonsense! Don't talk so foolishly!"
But I knew that that was just how he did regard me, and it made me sick
at heart. My beautiful day had clouded over. I supposed that nothing in
the world would ever induce this man to admit any feeling for me but
interest. Well, I wanted to love and to be loved, and it was a cold
sort of substitute he was offering me--pretty clothes and fine rooms. I
could earn all those things myself in time.
"Now, then," he said, "you _are_ going to be my darling, reasonable
little girl, aren't you? After all, it isn't so much I am asking of
you. All I want you to do is to leave your position and go to live with
this Mrs. Kingston. She struck me as being all right, and the rooms
are exceedingly attractive, though we'll furnish them over ourselves.
And then you are going to let me get you the proper kind of clothes
to wear. I'll choose them myself for you, Nora. Then, since you won't
go to school,--and, you see, I'm willing to let that go,--why, we
can arrange for you to take special lessons in languages and things
like that, and there are certain English courses you can take up at
Northwestern. And I want you to study music, too, piano and vocal--the
violin, too, if you like. I'm specially fond of music, and I think it
would be a good thing for you to take it up. Then in the spring you
shall go abroad. I have to go myself about that time, and I want to
see your face when you see Europe, honey." That was the only Southern
endearing term he ever applied to me, and I had never heard it used
before. "It will be a revelation to you. And now the whole thing is
settled, isn't it?"
I hated, after all this, to have to refuse again, so I didn't answer
him, and he said, taking my hand, and leaning, oh, so coaxingly toward
me:
"It's all settled, isn't it, dear?"