_MARRIAGE._
The next very important event in man's life is marriage, and naturally,
therefore, to this event there attached a multitude of superstitious
notions and practices, many of which, indeed, do still exist. The time
when marriage took place was of considerable importance. One very
prevalent superstition, common alike to all classes in the community,
and whose force is not yet spent, was the belief that it was unlucky to
marry in the month of May. The aversion to marrying in May finds
expression in the very ancient and well-known proverb, "Marry in May,
rue for aye," and thousands still avoid marrying in this month who can
render no more solid reason for their aversion than the authority of
this old proverb. But in former times there were reasons given, varying,
however, in different localities. Some of the reasons given were the
following:--That parties so marrying would be childless, or, if they had
children, that the first-born would be an idiot, or have some physical
deformity; or that the married couple would not lead a happy life, and
would soon tire of each other's society. The origin of this superstition
is to be found in ancient heathen religious beliefs and practices. We
have already noticed the ancient belief that the spirits of dead
ancestors haunted the living, and I have given a formula whereby a
single person could exorcise the ghosts of his departed relatives, and I
have also mentioned that national festivals to propitiate the spirits of
the dead were appointed by some nations. Now, we find that among the
Romans this national festival was held during the month of May, and
during its continuance all other forms of worship were suspended, and
the temples shut; and further, for any couple to contract marriage
during this season was held to be a daring of the Fates which few were
found hardy enough to venture. Ovid says--
"Pause while we keep these rites, ye widowed dames,
The marriage time a purer season claims;
Pause, ye fond mothers, braid not yet her hair,
Nor the ripe virgin for her lord prepare.
O, light not, Hymen, now your joyous fires,
Another torch nor yours the tomb requires!
Close all the temples on these mourning days,
And dim each altar's spicy, steaming blaze;
For now around us roams a spectred brood,
Craving and keen, and snuffing mortal food:
They feast and revel, nor depart again,
Till to the month but ten days more remain."
Superstitions of this sort linger much longer in the country than in
towns, and the larger the town the more speedily do they die out; but,
judging from the statistics of late years, this superstition has still a
firm hold of the inhabitants of Glasgow, the second city of the Empire.
During the year 1874 the marriages in May were only 204, against 703 in
June; but as the removal term occurs at the end of May, that must
materially affect the relations, in this respect, between May and June,
and accounts, in part, for the great excess of marriages in June. But
if the average of the eleven months, excluding May, be taken, then
during that year there was a monthly average of 441, against 204 in
May--being rather more than double. For the ten years preceding 1874,
the average of the eleven months was 388, against 203 in May. As if to
compensate for the restraint put upon the people in May, _Juno_, the
wife of Jupiter, after whom June was named, and whose influence was
paramount during that month, took special guardianship over births and
marriages; hence June was a lucky month to be born in or get married in,
and thus June is known as the marrying month. Here, again, our registers
show that the number of marriages are in June nearly double the average
of the other months, excluding May and June. The average during the ten
years is, for the ten months, 375 per month, whilst the average for June
is 598. It may be noticed in passing that, in Glasgow, January and July
stand as high as June, owing, doubtless, to the holidays which occur
during these two months making marriage at those times more convenient
for the working classes.
There were many marriage observances of a religious or superstitious
character practised in ancient Rome which were quite common among us
within this century, especially in the country districts, but which now
are either extinct or fast dying out. When a Roman girl was betrothed,
she received from her intended a ring which she wore as evidence of her
betrothal. When betrothed she laid aside her girlish or maiden
dress,--some parts of which were offered as a sacrifice to the household
gods,--and she was then clothed in the dress of a wife, and secluded
from her former companions, and put under training for her new duties.
When the time drew near for the consummation of the ceremony, it became
an important consideration to fix upon a lucky day and hour for the knot
to be tied. With this object astrologers, sooth-sayers, and others of
that class were consulted, who, by certain divinations ascertained the
most auspicious time for the union to take place in. When the day
arrived every occurrence was watched for omens. A crow or turtle dove
appearing near was a good omen: for these birds symbolized conjugal
fidelity. The ceremony was begun by sacrificing a sheep to Juno, the
fleece being spread upon two chairs on which the bride and bridegroom
sat: then a prayer was said over them. The young wife, carrying a
distaff and spindle filled with wool, was conducted to her house, a
cake, baked by the vestal virgins, being carried before her. The
threshold of the house was disenchanted by charms, and by annointing it
with certain unctuous perfumes; but as it was considered unlucky for the
new-made wife to tread upon the threshold on first entering her house,
she was lifted over it and seated upon a piece of wool, a symbol of
domestic industry. The keys of the house were then put into her hand,
and the cake was divided among the guests. The first work of the young
wife was to spin new garments for her husband. It will be seen that many
of these practices were mixed up with superstitious notions, many of
which were prevalent in this country sixty years ago, and some of which
still remain in country districts. Sixty years ago when a young woman
became a bride, she in a great measure secluded herself from society,
and mixed but little even with her companions, and on no account would
she show herself at church until after her marriage, as that was
considered very unlucky. The evening before the marriage her presents
and outfit were conveyed to her future home under the superintendence of
the best maid (bridesmaid), who carried with her a certain domestic
utensil filled with salt, which was the first article of the bride's
furnishing taken into the house. A portion of the salt was sprinkled
over the floor as a protection against an evil eye. The house being set
in order, the best maid returned to the bride's house where a company of
the bride's companions were met, and then occurred the ceremony of
washing the bride's feet. This was generally the occasion of much mirth.
And this was in all probability a survival of an old Scandinavian custom
under which the Norse bride was conducted by her maiden friends to
undergo a bath, called the bride's bath, a sort of religious
purification. On the marriage day, every trifling circumstance which
would have passed without notice at other times was noted and scanned
for omens of good or evil. If the morning was clear and shining, this
betokened a happy cheerful life; if dull and raining, the contrary
result might be anticipated. I have known the following incidents cause
grave concern about the future prospects of the young couple:--A clot of
soot coming down the chimney and spoiling the breakfast; the bride
accidentally breaking a dish; a bird sitting on the window sill chirping
for some time; the bird in the cage dying that morning; a dog howling,
and the postman forgetting to deliver a letter to the bride until he was
a good way off, and had to return. Some of these were defined for good,
but most of them were evil omens. The ceremony was generally performed
at the minister's residence, which was often a considerable distance
off. The marriage party generally walked all the way, but if the
distance was unusually great, the company rode the journey, and this was
called "a riding wedding." There were two companies--the bride's party
and the bridegroom's party. The bride's party met in the bride's
parents' house, the best man being with them, and the groom's party met
in his parents' house, the best maid being with them--the males
conducting the females to their respective parties. At the time
appointed the bride's party left first, followed immediately by the
groom's party--each company headed by the respective fathers. They so
arranged their walk that both parties would reach the minister's house
together. As soon as the ceremony was concluded, there was a rush on the
part of the young men to get the first kiss of the newly-made wife. This
was frequently taken by the clergyman himself, a survival of an old
custom said to have been practised in the middle ages. This custom is
referred to in the following old song. The bridegroom, addressing the
minister, says:--
"It's no very decent for you to be kissing,
It does not look weel wi' the black coat ava,
'Twould hae set you far better tae hae gi'en us your blessing,
Than thus by such tricks to be breaking the law.
Dear Watty, quo Robin, it's just an auld custom,
And the thing that is common should ne'er be ill taen,
For where ye are wrong, if ye hadna a wished him
You should have been first. It's yoursel it's to blame."
The party now returned in the following order: first, the two fathers in
company together, then the newly-married couple, behind them the best
man and the best maid, and the others following in couples as they
might arrange. There were frequently as many as twenty couples. On
coming within a mile or so of the young couple's house, where the mother
of the young good man was waiting, a few of the young men would start on
a race home. This race was often keenly contested, and was termed
_running the brooze_ or _braize_. The one who reached the house first
and announced the happy completion of the wedding, was presented with a
bottle of whiskey and a glass, with which he returned to meet the
marriage procession, and the progress of the procession was generally so
arranged that he would meet them before they arrived at the village or
town where the young couple were to be resident. He was therefore
considered their _first foot_, and distributed the contents of his
bottle among the party, each drinking to the health of the young married
pair, and then bottle and glass were thrown away and broken. The whole
party then proceeded on their way to the young folks' house. To be the
successful runner in this race was an object of considerable ambition,
and the whole town and neighbourhood took great interest in it. At
riding weddings it was the great ambition of farmers' sons to succeed in
winning the _braize_, and they would even borrow racing horses for the
occasion.
The origin of this custom of running the _braize_--it was so pronounced
in the west county--has long been a puzzle to antiquarians. Probably it
is the survival of a custom practised by our Scandinavian forefathers. A
Scandinavian hero or warrior considered it beneath his dignity to court
a lady's favour by submitting the matter of marriage to her decision.
When he saw or heard of a beauty whom he decided to make his wife, he
either went direct and took her away by force from her home, or he
gained the right to make her his bride by success in battle with his
opponents. Often, however, one who was no hero might gain the consent of
the parents to his marriage with their daughter, she having little or no
voice in the matter; and when she and her friends were on their way to
the church, some heroic but unapproved admirer, determined to win her by
force of arms, having collected his followers and friends who were ever
ready for a fight, would fall upon the marriage cortege, and carry off
the bride. Under those circumstances there was often great anxiety on
the part of both the groom's and bride's relations, who remained at home
when they had reason to apprehend that such attack might be made, and
so, whenever the marriage ceremony was over, some of the company hasted
home with the glad news; but commonly youths stationed themselves at the
church-door, ready to run the moment the ceremony was over, and whether
on foot or horseback, the race became an exciting one. He who first
brought the good news received as a reward a bowl of brose, and such
brose as was made in those days for this occasion was an acceptable
prize. Although the necessity for running ceased, the sport occasioned
by these contentions was too good and exciting to be readily given up,
but it came to be confined to those who were at the wedding, and many
young men looked forward eagerly to taking part in the sport. The prize
which originally was brose, came to be changed to something more
congenial to the tastes and usages of the times, viz., a bottle of
whiskey. In this way, I think, we may account for the custom of "running
the braize." It has been mentioned already that the best man went with
the bride to the minister. His duty it was to take charge of the bride
and hand her over to the bridegroom, a duty now performed by the bride's
father, and in this now obsolete custom, I think we may find a still
further proof that the management and customs of the marriage procession
were founded upon the old practice of wife-capture. The best man is
evidently just the bridegroom's friend, who, in the absence of the
bridegroom, undertakes to protect the bride against a raid until she
reaches the church, when he hands her over to his friend the bridegroom.
To meet a funeral either in going to or coming from marriage was very
unlucky. If the funeral was that of a female, the young wife would not
live long; if a male, the bridegroom would die soon.
After partaking of the _braize's_ hospitality,--for the bottle of
whiskey was his by right,--the wedding party proceeded to the house of
the young couple, and in some parts of Scotland, at the beginning of the
century, the young wife was lifted over the threshold, or first step of
the door, lest any witchcraft or _ill e'e_ should be cast upon and
influence her. Just at the entering of the house, the young man's mother
broke a cake of bread, prepared for the occasion, over the young wife's
head. She was then led to the hearth, and the poker and tongs--in some
places the broom also--were put into her hands, as symbols of her office
and duty. After this, her mother-in-law handed her the keys of the house
and furniture, thus transferring the mother's rights over her son to his
wife. Again the glass went round, and each guest drank and wished
happiness to the young pair. The cake which was broken over the young
wife's head was now gathered and distributed among the unmarried female
guests, and by them retained to be placed under their pillows, so that
they might dream of their future husbands. This is a custom still
practised, but what is now the bridescake is not a cake broken over the
bride's head, but a larger and more elaborately-prepared article, which
is cut up and distributed immediately after the marriage ceremony. Young
girls still put a piece of it under their pillows in order to obtain
prophetic dreams. In some cases, this is done by a friend writing the
names of three young men on a piece of paper, and the cake, wrapped in
it, is put under the pillow for three nights in succession before it is
opened. Should the owners of the cake have dreamed of one of the three
young men therein written, it is regarded as a sure proof that he is to
be her future husband. After drinking to the health and happiness of the
young couple, the wedding party then went to the house of the
bridegroom's father where they partook of supper, generally a very
substantial meal; and this being finished, the young people of the party
became restless for a change of amusement, and generally all then
repaired to some hall or barn, and there spent the night in dancing. It
was the custom for the young couple, with their respective parents and
the best man and the best maid, to lead off by dancing the first reel.
Should the young couple happen to have either brothers or sisters older
than themselves, but unmarried, these unfortunate brethren danced the
first reel without their shoes. Probably this has its origin in the old
Jewish custom of giving up the shoe or sandal when the right or priority
passed from one to another. For an instance of this see Ruth iv. 7.
Having danced till far on in the morning of next day, the young couple
were then conducted home. The young wife, assisted by her female
friends, undressed and got to bed, then the young man was sent into bed
by his friends, and then all the marriage party entered the bedroom,
when the young wife took one of her stockings, which had been put in bed
with her, and threw it among the company. The person who got this was to
be the first married. The best man then handed round the glass, and when
all had again drank to the young couple, the company retired. This
custom was termed _the bedding_, and was regarded as a ceremony
necessary to the completion of the marriage; and there can be little
doubt that it is a survival of a very ancient ceremony of the same
family as the old Grecian custom of removing the bride's coronet and
putting her to bed. This particular form of ceremony was also found in
Scotland, and continued to comparatively modern times. Young Scotch
maidens formerly wore a snood, a sort of coronet, open at the top,
called the virgin snood, and before being put to bed on the marriage
night this snood was removed by the young women of the party. This
custom is referred to in an ancient ballad.
"They've ta'en the bride to the bridal bed,
To loose her snood nae mind they had.
'I'll loose it,' quo John."
On the morning after some of the married women of the neighbourhood met
in the young wife's house and put on her the _curtch_ or closs cap
(_mutch_), a token of the marriage state. In my young days unmarried
women went with the head uncovered; but after marriage, never were seen
without a cap. On the morning after marriage the best man and maid
breakfasted with the young couple, after which they spent the day in the
country, or if they lived in the country, they went to town for a
change. Weddings were invariably celebrated on a Friday,--the reason for
this preference being, as is supposed, that Friday was the day dedicated
by the Norsemen to the goddess, Friga, the bestower of joy and
happiness. The wedding day being Friday, the walking-day was a Saturday;
and on Sunday the young couple, with their best man and best maid,
attended church in the forenoon, and took a walk in the afternoon, then
spent the evening in the house of one of their parents, the meeting
there being closed by family worship, and a pious advice to the young
couple to practise this in their own house.
If the bride had been courted by other sweethearts than he who was now
her husband, there was a fear that those discarded suitors might
entertain unkindly feelings towards her, and that their evil wishes
might supernaturally influence her, and affect her first-born. This evil
result was sought to be averted by the bride wearing a sixpence in her
left shoe till she was _kirked_; but should the bride have made a vow to
any other, and broken it, this wearing of the sixpence did not prevent
the evil consequences from falling upon her first-born. Many instances
were currently quoted among the people of first-born children, under
such circumstances, having been born of such unnatural shapes and
natures that, with the sanction of the minister and the relations, the
monster birth was put to death. Captain Burt, in his letters from the
Highlands, written early in the eighteenth century, says that "soon
after the wedding day the newly-married wife sets herself about spinning
her winding sheet, and a husband that shall sell or pawn it is esteemed
among all men one of the most profligate." And Dr. Jamieson says--"When
a woman of the lower class in Scotland, however poor, or whether married
or single, commences housekeeping, her _first care_, after what is
absolutely necessary for the time, is to provide _death linen_ for
herself and those who look to her for that office, and _her next_ to
earn, save, and _lay up (not put out to interest)_ such money as may
decently serve for funeral expenses. And many keep secret these
honorable deposits and salutary _mementoes_ for two or threescore
years."
This practice was continued within my recollection. The first care of
the young married wife was still, in my young days, to spin and get
woven sufficient linen to make for herself and her husband their _dead
claes_. I can well remember the time when, in my father's house, these
things were spread out to air before the fire. This was done
periodically, and these were days when mirth was banished from the
household, and everything was done in a solemn mood. The day was kept as
a Sabbath. The reader will not fail to observe in some of these modern
customs and beliefs modified survivals of the old Roman practices and
superstitious beliefs.