_Aiax_. Thersites!
_Ther_. Agamemnon-how if he had boils full, an over, generally?
_Aiax_. Thersites!
_Ther_. And those boils did run-say so. Did not the general run then?
Were not that a botchy core?
_Aiax_. Dog!
_Ther_. Then there would come some matter from him; I see none now.
_Aiax_. Thou bitch-wolf’s son, canst thou not hear? Feel, then.
[Strikes him]
_Ther_. The plague of Greece upon thee, thou mongrel beef-witted lord!
_Aiax_. Speak, then, thou whinid’st leaven, speak. I will beat thee
into handsomeness.
_Ther_. I shall sooner rail thee into wit and holiness; but I think thy
horse will sooner con an oration than thou learn a prayer without book.
Thou canst strike, canst thou? A red murrain o’ thy jade’s tricks!
_Aiax_. Toadstool, learn me the proclamation.
_Ther_. Dost thou think I have no sense, thou strikest me thus?
_Aiax_. The proclamation!
_Ther_. Thou art proclaim’d, a fool, I think.
_Aiax_. Do not, porpentine, do not; my fingers itch.
_Ther_. I would thou didst itch from head to foot and I had the
scratching of thee; I would make thee the loathsomest scab in Greece.
When thou art forth in the incursions, thou strikest as slow as
another.
_Aiax_. I say, the proclamation.
_Ther_. Thou grumblest and railest every hour on Achilles; and thou art
as full of envy at his greatness as Cerberus is at Proserpina’s
beauty-ay, that thou bark’st at him.
_Aiax_. Mistress Thersites!
_Ther_. Thou shouldst strike him.
_Aiax_. Cobloaf!
_Ther_. He would pun thee into shivers with his fist, as a sailor
breaks a biscuit.
_Aiax_. You whoreson cur! [Strikes him]
_Ther_. Do, do.
_Aiax_. Thou stool for a witch!
_Ther_. Ay, do, do; thou sodden-witted lord! Thou hast no more brain
than I have in mine elbows; an assinico may tutor thee. You scurvy
valiant ass! Thou art here but to thrash Troians, and thou art bought
and sold among those of any wit like a barbarian slave. If thou use to
beat me, I will begin at thy heel and tell what thou art by inches,
thou thing of no bowels, thou!
_Aiax_. You dog!
_Ther_. You scurvy lord!
_Aiax_. You cur! [Strikes him]
_Ther_. Mars his idiot! Do, rudeness; do, camel; do, do.