4. How to make yourself acceptable to others, in person, manners, and
conversation.
You can be as polite to the boot-black as to the President. This is
done, not by an air of condescension, but by treating him as a man,
according to his place. Render him his due, and he will be likely to
render you yours.
The same person who is overbearing to his inferiors, is likely to show
a cringing servility to his superiors. Both faults are marks of a mean
and groveling mind. Maintain your self-respect, if you would enjoy the
respect of others.
Cherish that delicacy of sentiment, that quick sympathy with others,
that nice sense of justice which will make you as regardful of their
feelings as of their more substantial rights, and you will not fail to
be polite. Without the sentiments of a gentleman, you may know all the
rules of politeness, and be scrupulously observant of all the external
forms of good breeding, and yet never be a gentleman.
In short, to be a true gentleman, you must be generous and noble,
as well as just and courteous. You must be scrupulously careful to
be--Pure in body, pure in manners, pure in morals, and pure in heart.
Follow fashion moderately, if you would follow it gracefully. Never
rely on dress to make you a gentleman. It is as flimsy a disguise as
the lion’s skin was to the ass; his braying betraying him, and his
unsuitable attire only made him appear the more ridiculous.
A good enunciation is a distinctive mark of good breeding. Speak
your words plainly and distinctly, and in a moderate tone of voice.
Pronounce words in the manner that is used by the best bred persons,
but not affectedly, or with a strained precision. Avoid all vulgar or
inaccurate vowel sounds, as keow, ile, soit, for cow, oil, sight. Do
not slip or smother your consonants, as gen’lm’n for gentleman, mornin’
for morning, &c.