_Palace of the Duke of Genoa._
_Enter_ FERNEZE _ushering_ AURELIA, EMILIA _and_ MAQUERELLE
_bearing up her train_, BIANCA _attending: then
exeunt_ EMILIA _and_ BIANCA.
_Aurel._ And is't possible? Mendoza slight me!
possible?
_Fer._ Possible!
What can be strange in him that's drank with favour,[387]
Grows insolent with grace?--Speak, Maquerelle, speak.
_Maq._ To speak feelingly, more, more richly in solid
sense than worthless words, give me those jewels of your
ears to receive my enforced duty. As for my part, 'tis
well known I can put up[388] anything [FERNEZE _privately
feeds_ MAQUERELLE'S _hands with jewels during this speech_];
can bear patiently with any man: but when I heard he
wronged your precious sweetness, I was enforced to take
deep offence. 'Tis most certain he loves Emilia with high
appetite: and, as she told me (as you know we women
impart our secrets one to another), when she repulsed his
suit, in that he was possessed with your endeared grace,
Mendoza most ingratefully renounced all faith to you. 16
_Fer._ Nay, called you--Speak, Maquerelle, speak.
Maq. By heaven, witch, dried biscuit; and contested
blushlessly he loved you but for a spurt or so.
_Fer._ For maintenance.
_Maq._ Advancement and regard.
_Aurel._ O villain! O impudent Mendoza!
_Maq._ Nay, he is the rustiest-jawed,[389] the foulest-mouthed
knave in railing against our sex: he will rail
against[390] women--
_Aurel._ How? how?
_Maq._ I am ashamed to speak't, I.
_Aurel._ I love to hate him: speak.
_Maq._ Why, when Emilia scorned his base unsteadiness,
the black-throated rascal scolded, and said-- 30
_Aurel._ What?
_Maq._ Troth, 'tis too shameless.
_Aurel._ What said he?
_Maq._ Why, that, at four, women were fools; at fourteen,
drabs; at forty, bawds; at fourscore, witches; and
[at] a hundred, cats.
_Aurel._ O unlimitable impudency!
_Fer._ But as for poor Ferneze's fixèd heart,
Was never shadeless meadow drier parch'd
Under the scorching heat of heaven's dog, 40
Than is my heart with your enforcing eyes.
_Maq._ A hot simile.
_Fer._ Your smiles have been my heaven, your frowns my hell:
O, pity, then! grace should with beauty dwell.
_Maq._ Reasonable perfect, by'r lady.
_Aurel._ I will love thee, be it but in despite
Of that Mendoza:--witch!--Ferneze,--witch!--
Ferneze, thou art the duchess' favourite:
Be faithful, private: but 'tis dangerous.
_Fer._ His love is lifeless that for love fears breath: 50
The worst that's due to sin, O, would 'twere death!
_Aurel._ Enjoy my favour. I will be sick instantly and
take physic: therefore in depth of night visit--
_Maq._ Visit her chamber, but conditionally you shall
not offend her bed: by this diamond!
_Fer._ By this diamond. [_Giving diamond to_ MAQ.
_Maq._ Nor tarry longer than you please: by this ruby!
_Fer._ By this ruby. [_Giving ruby to_ MAQ.
_Maq._ And that the door shall not creak. 60
_Fer._ And that the door shall not creak.
_Maq._ Nay, but swear.
_Fer._ By this purse. [_Giving purse to_ MAQ.
_Maq._ Go to, I'll keep your oaths for you: remember,
visit.
_Aurel._ Dried biscuit!--Look where the base wretch
comes.
_Enter_ MENDOZA, _reading a sonnet_.
_Men._ "_Beauty's life, heaven's model, love's queen_,"--
_Maq._ That's his Emilia.
_Men._ "_Natures triumph, best on[391] earth_,"-- 70
_Maq._ Meaning Emilia.
_Men._ "_Thou only wonder that the world hath seen_,"--
_Maq._ That's Emilia.
_Aurel._ Must I, then, hear her praised?--Mendoza!
_Men._ Madam, your excellency is graciously encountered:
I have been writing passionate flashes in
honour of--
[_Exit_ FERNEZE.
_Aurel._ Out, villain, villain!
O judgment, where have been my eyes? what
Bewitch'd election made me dote on thee? 80
What sorcery made me love thee? But, be gone;
Bury thy head. O, that I could do more
Than loath thee! hence, worst of ill!
No reason ask, our reason is our will.[392]
[_Exit with_ MAQUERELLE.
_Men._ Women! nay, Furies; nay, worse; for they
torment only the bad, but women good and bad.
Damnation of mankind! Breath, hast thou praised
them for this? and is't you, Ferneze, are wriggled into
smock-grace? sit sure. O, that I could rail against
these monsters in nature, models of hell, curse of the
earth, women! that dare attempt anything, and what
they attempt they care not how they accomplish; without
all premeditation or prevention; rash in asking,
desperate in working, impatient in suffering, extreme in
desiring, slaves unto appetite, mistresses in dissembling,
only constant in unconstancy, only perfect in counterfeiting:
their words are feigned, their eyes forged, their
sighs[393] dissembled, their looks counterfeit, their hair
false, their given hopes deceitful, their very breath
artificial: their blood is their only god; bad clothes,
and old age, are only the devils they tremble at. That
I could rail now! 102
_Enter_ PIETRO, _his sword drawn_.
_Pietro._ A mischief fill thy throat, thou foul-jaw'd slave!
Say thy prayers.
_Men._ I ha' forgot 'em.
_Pietro._ Thou shalt die.
_Men._ So shalt thou. I am heart-mad.
_Pietro._ I am horn-mad.
_Men._ Extreme mad.
_Pietro._ Monstrously mad.
_Men._ Why? 111
_Pietro._ Why! thou, thou hast dishonoured my bed.
_Men._ I! Come, come, sit; here's my bare heart to thee,
As steady as is the centre to this[394] glorious world:
And yet, hark, thou art a cornuto,--but by me?
_Pietro._ Yes, slave, by thee.
_Men._ Do not, do not with tart and spleenful breath
Lose him can lose thee. I offend my duke!
Bear record, O ye dumb and raw-air'd nights,
How vigilant my sleepless eyes have been 120
To watch the traitor! record, thou spirit of truth,
With what debasement I ha' thrown myself
To under offices, only to learn
The truth, the party, time, the means, the place,
By whom, and when, and where thou wert disgrac'd!
And am I paid with slave? hath my intrusion
To places private and prohibited,
Only to observe the closer passages,
Heaven knows with vows of revelation,
Made me suspected, made me deem'd a villain? 130
What rogue hath wrong'd us?
_Pietro._ Mendoza, I may err.
_Men._ Err! 'tis too mild a name: but err and err,
Run giddy with suspect, 'fore through me thou know
That which most creatures, save thyself, do know:
Nay, since my service hath so loath'd reject,
'Fore I'll reveal, shalt find them clipt together.
_Pietro._ Mendoza, thou knowest I am a most plain-breasted
man.
_Men._ The fitter to make a cornuto:[395] would your
brows were most plain too! 140
_Pietro._ Tell me: indeed, I heard thee rail--
_Men._ At women, true: why, what cold fleam[396] could choose,
Knowing a lord so honest, virtuous,
So boundless loving, bounteous, fair-shap'd, sweet,
To be contemn'd, abus'd, defam'd, made cuckold?
Heart! I hate all women for't: sweet sheets, wax lights,
antic bedposts, cambric smocks, villainous curtains, arras
pictures, oiled hinges, and all the[397] tongue-tied lascivious
witnesses of great creatures' wantonness,--what salvation
can you expect? 150
_Pietro._ Wilt thou tell me?
_Men._ Why, you may find it yourself; observe,
observe.
_Pietro._ I ha' not the patience: wilt thou deserve me,
tell, give it.
_Men._ Take't: why, Ferneze is the man, Ferneze: I'll
prove't; this night you shall take him in your sheets:
will't serve?
_Pietro._ It will; my bosom's in some peace: till night--
_Men._ What?
_Pietro._ Farewell.
_Men._ God! how weak a lord are you! 160
Why, do you think there is no more but so?
_Pietro._ Why!
_Men._ Nay, then, will I presume to counsel you:
It should be thus. You with some guard upon the sudden
Break into the princess' chamber: I stay behind,
Without the door, through which he needs must pass:
Ferneze flies; let him: to me he comes; he's kill'd
By me, observe, by me: you follow: I rail,
And seem to save the body. Duchess comes,
On whom (respecting her advancèd birth, 170
And your fair nature), I know, nay, I do know,
No violence must be us'd; she comes: I storm,
I praise, excuse Ferneze, and still maintain
The duchess' honour: she for this loves me.
I honour you; shall know her soul, you mine:
Then naught shall she contrive in vengeance
(As women are most thoughtful in revenge)
Of her Ferneze, but you shall sooner know't
Than she can think't. Thus shall his death come sure,
Your duchess brain-caught: so your life secure. 180
_Pietro._ It is too well: my bosom and my heart
When nothing helps, cut off the rotten part.
[_Exit._
_Men._ Who cannot feign friendship can ne'er produce
the effects of hatred. Honest fool duke! subtle lascivious
duchess! silly novice Ferneze! I do laugh at ye. My
brain is in labour till it produce mischief, and I feel
sudden throes, proofs sensible, the issue is at hand.
As bears shape young, so I'll form my device,
Which grown proves horrid: vengeance makes men wise.
[_Exit._
[387] "With favour"--omitted in some copies of ed. 2.
[388] Omitted in ed. 2.
[389] Ed. 2. "rustiest jade."
[390] Ed. 1. "agen."
[391] Ed. 1. "of."
[392] Ed. 1. gives:--
"No reason else, my reason is my will."
[393] Old eds. "sights" (and, as Dyce remarks, so the word was
sometimes written).
[394] Ed. 1. "this center to this."--Ed. 2. "this centre to the."
[395] Ed. 2. "cuckolde."
[396] Phlegm.
[397] Ed. 1. "ye."