WE BECOME BANDITS
That’s always the way it is with Pee-wee. All of a sudden he springs a
big idea. Mr. Ellsworth (he’s our scoutmaster) says Pee-wee’s good turns
are planned on a large scale. They’re masterpieces, that’s what Mr.
Ellsworth says. And this one I’m telling you about was especially good
because it was kind of crazy.
Hervey said, “That’s just what we want, a good climax for this
funny-bone hike. We’ll wind up in a blaze of glory.”
“The end of a perfect day,” Bert said.
The man said he guessed we must have had a lot of fun.
“We’ve got a lot left, too,” I told him; “we’ve got enough to last a
couple of weeks. We never knew when we started out how many dandy
misfortunes there are. I bet we had more fun starving than anybody else
ever did.” Then I said; “Hey, mister, what’s your name?”
He said his name was Goobenhoff but he wouldn’t tell us his front name
because we couldn’t pronounce it.
I said, “Tell it to us without pronouncing it.”
He said, “When you go on a hike it’s good to have a destination.”
Hervey said, “Sure it is, because then we know where not to go. We never
start out without taking a destination with us.”
After a little while the jitney bus came along from the other direction
and we all set up a shout. Darby Curren was driving it and scouts were
sticking their heads out of the windows. Gee whiz, maybe what we were
going to do was crazy, but when I saw the faces of those fellows I said,
“Crazy things are all right; as long as a thing is a good turn it
doesn’t matter.”
Gee, I didn’t blame the Camp Committee because they couldn’t help the
camp being crowded, and troops are supposed to fix it up about their
cabins a long time ahead, but just the same it seemed funny as long as
scouts are all brothers that those fellows should have to go to another
camp, because _believe me_, there’s only one place and that is Temple
Camp. I guess you know yourselves what fun we have there.
I said to the fellows, “This funny-bone hike is going to end in
something worth while or else the whole day is lost.”
“Let it be lost,” Hervey said; “there’s a lot of fun being lost.”
I said, “Pee-wee, this is your job, go to it.” The kid stepped right out
into the middle of the road, very brave and daring. All the while he was
pulling up his stocking; it was awful funny to see him. Mr. Goobenhoff
just laughed and laughed. I guess he was having a lot of fun too.
Pee-wee held up his hand like a traffic cop and shouted, “Stop! In the
name of the funny-bone hikers of the Boy Scouts of America, _stop!_ Wait
a second till I fix my garter.”
Darby shouted, “Hello, Scout Harris; what’s the matter with your face?”
“It’s supposed to be invincible,” the kid shouted. “Stop where you are!”
“Your mouth is all black,” Darby said.
“I was eating a roasted potato,” Pee-wee said. “Who have you got in that
bus?”
“Is this a hold-up?” Darby wanted to know. “I haven’t got anything with
me but a cheese sandwich.”
“Give it to me,” the kid shouted.
“Give it to me,” Garry said.
By that time Mr. Goobenhoff was laughing so hard he just shook, and
Darby was laughing too. In a couple of seconds about seven or eight
scouts came pell-mell out of the bus to see what all the fuss was about.
There was a man with them, he was their scoutmaster, and he was smiling
and looking kind of surprised.
I guess it must have seemed funny when they saw that garage and saw us
standing there in the road. We were all kind of dirty and shabby after
our adventures and Hervey Willetts had on that funny hat he always wears
with holes cut in it and advertising buttons all over it. It was cocked
away over on the side of his head and he was balancing a stick on his
nose.
Pee-wee shouted at him, “Take that stick down. Don’t you know how
bandits act? You’re supposed to look savage.”
I gave one look at poor little Willie Cook trying to look savage, and
then I doubled up. Pee-wee had black all around his mouth and he was
swinging his belt-axe; he looked awful funny.
He stood right in front of the bus and shouted, “Who are you and why? We
captured a portable garage! Do you think we can’t capture a jitney bus?
Nobody can pass this spot. We’re here to do a good turn whether you want
us to or not. We’re wild and savage, we live on fish and milk chocolate
and we were starving on a desert drawbridge. Hold up your hands and make
the scout salute. To-night you sleep at Temple Camp. Has anybody got a
piece of string? My garter’s busted.”