CONSIDERATION FOR OTHERS
Consideration for others is man's noblest attitude toward his fellow
man. For every seed of human kindness he plants, _a flower blooms in the
garden of his own heart_. In him who gives in such a way there is no
hypocritical feeling of charity bestowed. His very act disarms the
thought. It is as natural for an honorable man to show consideration to
others as it is for him to eat and sleep. Acts of kindness are the
_outward manifestations of gentle breeding_--a refinement of character
in the highest sense of the word.
What would we do in this world without the helping hand, the friendly
word of cheer, the thought that others shared our losses and cheered our
victories? If consideration for our feelings and thoughts did not exist
on this earth we would never know the depths of the love of our friends.
There would be no such thing as an earthly reward of merit. We know that
no matter what happens to us in the battle of life there will be someone
to cheer us on our way. We may be strong and thoroughly able to rely
upon ourselves but there comes a time when we need friendship and
sympathy. Society would crumble into dust without these influences. The
family circle would degenerate into a hollow mockery if consideration
each for the other was absent. It sweetens and makes wholesome what
otherwise might only be an existence of monotonous toil.
Consideration for others is _the milk of human kindness_. For what we do
for others our recompense is _in the act itself_ ... we should claim no
other reward. Observation brings to view that they who give in real
charity _cloak their acts from the eyes of all save the recipient_.
Givers of this type rise to the supreme heights of greatness. It is a
part of their wisdom to know what is best to be done and they go about
it as a pleasure as well as a duty.
Consideration for others pays big dividends. It is a virtue that makes
for strong friendships and true affections. Those who possess it have a
hard time hiding their light under a bushel. In teaching fortitude to
others they partake of the same knowledge. In the hours of their own
affliction they retain their courage and keep their minds unsoured. They
are the _sure-enough "good fellows" of life_ and their presence is the
signal for instantaneous good cheer. We all know them by their gentle
knock at the door. In a thousand ways they impress themselves upon our
lives, have entered into our councils, have given us the right advice at
the right time--and when the sad day comes along _their strong shoulders
are there for us to lean upon_.
Consideration for others is apt to be an inherent quality, but like
everything else it can be accentuated or modified according to our own
determination. It is a growth that should be inculcated _early in the
lives of children_--the earlier the better. A child's most
impressionable age is said to be between its fourth and fifth years.
Then is the time to teach it the little niceties of life--the closing of
a door softly--tip-toeing quietly that mother may not be awakened from
her nap--tidiness--cleanliness--good morals--all of which are to become
vital factors in a life of consideration for others.
A great many of us have the desire to be of service to others but
_timidity_ holds us back. Say, for instance, one might see a person in
great distress and because of diffidence withhold the proffered
hand--someone we've known who comes to the point of penury but has _too
much pride_ to ask assistance--we pass by fearful that we might offend.
How many times has this happened to us? Who knows but the best friend we
have at this very moment would give anything in the world if his pride
would let him bridge that distance between us.
[Illustration: _A Scene from "The Americano"--Matching Wits for Gold_]
Nevertheless the desire to do the right thing was in itself helpful. The
thought of doing something for someone was a correct impulse and
should have been carried into action. Early in life we should have
started our foundation for doing things in the cause of others. Putting
off the time when we shall begin to obey our higher impulses toward
helpfulness to our fellows is but a reaction in our own characters which
_dulls determination_. We want to do but we don't. As time goes on we
just _don't_--that's all. Our good intentions have gone to pave the
bottomless pits containing our unfulfilled heart promptings. We meant
well--_but we failed to act_--we didn't have the courage. Our failures
spread a gloom before us. _We lost our chances for a happy life!_
The man with the ability to laugh has little diffidence about these
matters. Having confidence in himself and being happy and alert he goes
to the friend in need with courage and the kind of help that helps. If
he doesn't do it directly he finds a way to reach him through mutual
friends. He does not go about _parading_ his kindness, either. He has
gained a sincere and beautiful pleasure out of aiding an old friend and
he can go on his way rejoicing that life is worth living when he has
lived up to its higher ideals.
Consideration for others does not necessarily involve only the big
things. It is the sum and total of numberless acts and thoughts that
make for friendships and kindliness. People who are thoughtful surely
brighten the world. They are ever ready to do some little thing at the
correct moment and after a time we begin to realize how much their
presence means to us. We may not notice them the first time, or the
third, or the fifth, but after a while we become conscious of their
persistence and we esteem them accordingly. Such men are the products of
_clean, straightforward lives._ They are never too busy to exchange a
pleasant word. They do not flame into anger on a pretext. Their code of
existence is well ordered and filled to the brim with lots to do and
lots to think about. The old saying: "_If you want anything go to a busy
man_," applies to them in this regard. The busier men are the more time
they seem to have for _kindliness_.
Another word for consideration is service. Nothing brings a greater
self-reward than a service done in an hour of need, or a favor granted
during a day's grind. The generous man who climbs to the top of the
ladder helps many others on their way. The more he does for someone else
the more he does for _himself_. The stronger he becomes--the greater his
influence in his community. Doing things for others may not bring in
_bankable dividends_ but it does bring in _happiness_. Such actions
scorn a higher reward. We have only to try out the plan to learn the
truth for ourselves. A good place to begin is _at home_. Then, _the
office_, or wherever life leads us. And in doing these things we will
laugh as we go along--we will laugh and get the most out of living.
Our little day-by-day kindnesses when added together constitute in time
a huge asset on the right side of our ledger of life. We should start
the day with something that helps another get through his day ... even
if it isn't any more than a smile and a wave of the hand. And he will
remember us for it.
It is said that advice is cheap and for that reason is given freely.
But the proper kind of advice is about as rare as the proverbial hen's
tooth. In order to give real advice we must understand the man who asks
for it. If what we say to him is to become of value we must see to it
that his mind is put in proper shape to receive advice. Be sure that he
laughs, or smiles at least, before we seriously take up his case. And
when we have done our stunt in the way of advice let's send him away
with a fine good humor. A friendly pat on the back as he goes out our
doorway may mean a bracer to his determination. "_You'll put it over_,"
we shout after him--and thus we have been of real help. He needed
sympathy and courage. He needed a cheerful spirit--so came to us and we
didn't let him go away until we gave him all these. Bully for us!
Consideration for others does not admit of ostentation and hypocrisy. We
never allow our left hand to know what our right hand does in charity,
nor do we _boast of our helpful attitude toward our fellow men_. It is
well to make a point of this fact--in this world are many
"_ne'er-do-wells"_ who fail to profit by advice and thereby become
professional in the seeking of favors. Consideration owes them nothing
and to withstand their persistent appeals would in time _dull our
natural tendencies_ toward helping others.
The world helps those who help themselves. We have little admiration for
the man who is forever whining. Society has no work for such people as
these. When we have exhausted every means of helping such a man we must
in self-defense pass him up before he contaminates our sense of justice.
_We must keep our visions clear._
Consideration for others is a prime refinement of character. To be able
to use it in our daily lives becomes one of our greatest consolations.
Sympathy begets affection and kindly deeds--in a relative sense it binds
together the properties which go to make _the soul within us_.
Browbeating, scolding, irascibility and the like are microbes which
react against the milk of human kindness, to which, if we succumb,
leaves us stranded and alone amid a world of friendliness and good
fellowship.