A LAST LOOK.
Soon after Dr. James's return from Maine, he was apprised by his
friend Philip of his approaching wedding, to take place at Newport,
on September first. Philip urged his and Jessie's wish that he should
be a groomsman; but this Dr. James, knowing that Margaret would of
course be a bridesmaid, declared would be out of the question. He
unwillingly promised to be present at both wedding and reception,
because he had no reason to give for declining; and he looked forward
to the day with mingled feelings of dread and impatience. He bought
a dress suit for the first time for years; and when he was arrayed
in state, gloves and all, surveyed himself from head to foot with
strong disapprobation. He had spent the night at a hotel in Newport,
and, having completed his toilet, descended to the parlor, where he
had an opportunity of beholding his _tout ensemble_ in the long glass
between the windows.
"I look like the ass in the lion's skin," he said to himself; "only
I suppose that was too big for him, while every thing I have on is
too small for me. I sha'n't be myself again till I get off these
vanities."
He arrived at the church full half an hour before the time, he
was so afraid of being late, and chose his seat up-stairs, where
he could see better without being conspicuous. He observed the
showy dresses and latest fashions with wonder and disapproval, and
speculated on the probable cost of the ladies assembled to their
husbands and fathers, till the clock pointed to twelve and the
bridal party arrived. First came a troop of little girls in white,
with pink and blue sashes, carrying baskets of flowers; then Mrs.
Edgar with Philip; the six bridesmaids followed, headed by Margaret,
each accompanied by her groomsman, and the doctor noticed that Miss
Lester's companion was a tall, handsome fellow, with a fair mustache;
last came the bride, on the arm of an elderly man, whom Dr. James
supposed to be her uncle.
The ceremony was soon over, and the church rapidly becoming
deserted, when Dr. James descended from his post of observation, and
got into a carriage to go to Mrs. Edgar's house. He found the two
handsome parlors quite full, and stood for a few minutes at the door
observing the scene before him.
The bride and bridegroom stood at the end of the room, with the
pretty children playing in the bay-window behind them. Philip
looked as proud and beaming as might have been expected, and
Jessie was just what the doctor thought she would be: very pretty
and refined, looking timid and rather flushed at receiving so
many congratulations. His eyes scarcely rested on her; for he was
immediately conscious of Margaret standing near her, apparently
dividing her attentions pretty equally between three gentlemen. Her
dress was white, very rich and flowing; she held a beautiful bouquet,
and there were rose-buds in her hair and on her dress. The next
thing he knew, one of the gentlemen-managers was asking his name, he
was led up and presented, and found himself embraced by Philip, and
greeted with a sweet smile by Jessie.
"He is the best fellow in the world," said the bridegroom; and Jessie
added,
"We are very glad to see you, Dr. James; it was very kind of you to
come."
Then he turned to find Margaret by his side, with the smile he
knew so well, and the cordial, outstretched hand. His face flushed
painfully, but he was not called upon to speak, for Philip remarked,
"Oh! yes, you are old acquaintances, are you not? Where is Mrs.
Edgar? I want her so much to see him. Oh! there she is at the end of
the other room. I suppose it wouldn't do for me to leave Jessie."
And he turned to his bride with a face full of happiness.
"I will go with Dr. James," said Margaret at once; and he found
himself walking, with her on his arm, through the crowd of people,
some of whom regarded him with curiosity.
"You were at the church, were you not?" began Margaret at once; "and
was she not a lovely bride? I was very much afraid it would be a
showery wedding; but Jessie behaved very well, only she arrived at
home a perfect Niobe, and had to be consoled in private before she
could face all these people."
"Why should she have to be consoled?"
"Now, that's just what I say, Dr. James; why does she marry him if
it doesn't make her happy? Philip, however, seems to understand her,
and I leave to him the task of comforting. She is very fond of her
mother, and it is very hard for her to live so far away, you know."
"Miss Lester, you look thin and pale," the doctor said very abruptly;
he did not mean to say it, the words came almost involuntarily.
"Yes, this has been a wearing time for all of us; I am glad it is
nearly over. Here we are. Mrs. Edgar, this is Philip's friend and
mine, Dr. James."
The doctor received the kindest greeting, and was overpowered with
questions about his mother, who had been a school friend of Mrs.
Edgar, and his sisters. He tried to answer them intelligibly,
thinking, however, only of Miss Lester, and conscious that she had
turned away to be polite to other guests. Mrs. Edgar then introduced
him to Jessie's sister Isabel, a fresh little girl of sixteen, who
looked full of fun and mischief, and she in turn presented him to a
friend, a tall young lady, who immediately began to talk to him so
fast that he could hardly keep up with her. Mrs. Edgar suggested that
he should get some ice-cream for himself and them, and then occupied
herself with other people, considering that her duties of hospitality
to him were performed. Dr. James went obediently into the next room
and returned, after some difficulties, with ices and cake, and did
his best to be polite. Soon Isabel was sent into the other room to
see about the children, and the talkative young lady became engaged
in conversation with an equally voluble young gentleman, so that Dr.
James found himself again alone. He put down his untasted cake, and
seeing a glass of wine near him, which seemed to belong to no one,
he drank it and felt rather better. The solitariness one sometimes
feels in a crowd came over him, and he looked from one strange face
to another, feeling himself completely out of place. Mrs. Edgar was
absorbed in duties of hospitality; Jessie and Philip in the distance,
during a pause in the stream of guests, were engrossed in each other;
even Margaret seemed to have completely forgotten him, and he saw her
earnestly talking with her handsome groomsman. He regretted that he
had refused to be a groomsman; no doubt he would have been assigned
to Margaret, as the corresponding "best friend," and then she would
have been talking to him instead of to that fellow; from which it
will be seen that he had already arrived at a stage of lover-like
inconsistency, since his sole motive for declining his friend's
invitation had been his dread of encountering Miss Lester.
He saw that many people were going, and it came to him as a happy
thought that he might go too. He interrupted Mrs. Edgar to shake
hands again with her, observed that Margaret was near the door,
and next made his way to Philip, with whom he had a little talk,
unsatisfactory, of course, but one's best friend must be excused for
being preoccupied on such an occasion. Philip parted from him with
resignation, saying that he must come to California and settle, that
he would do splendidly there and make a fortune. Such a prospect
seemed to the doctor dreary in the extreme; and owning to himself
that he did not at all begrudge to Philip his pretty and delicate
bride, he bade her a friendly farewell, and approached Margaret. He
was glad to interrupt the groomsman in the _sotto voce_ remarks he
was making, and to have Margaret turn at once to him and leave her
companion to his own reflections.
"Good-by, Miss Lester. I go back to Sealing this afternoon."
"Good-by, Dr. James. I am very glad you came." That was all; how
soon these words were said! Again he met the straightforward look of
those clear, brown eyes; again he felt the kind pressure of her hand.
Her glove was off and so was his, (not accident on his part,) and he
felt that her hand was cold. He was on the point of saying, "How pale
you are!" but remembered just in time, that he had made that remark
before.
In another minute he was outside the door, and driving to the hotel.
As he drew his tight boots from his aching feet, and resumed his
comfortable, familiar clothes, he said to himself,
"This episode in my life is closed. I must shut her completely out of
my existence, and go on as if there were no such woman as Margaret
Lester."
So he took the five o'clock train, and arrived safely in Sealing that
night.