OLD BONES, AND YOUNG ONES.
So much was I vexed at this idea, that Sir Roland Towers-Twentifold
valued me, only as a flying puppet, a machine to be started from a
spiral spring, or a little boy's coloured balloon, that I assure you,
although I was on a bed soft as a dew-cloud--for we did not lie upon
cast-iron yet--scarcely a wink of sleep came near me, without being
scattered into a fire-wheel of dreams. If it appeared to me a small
thing--as it did in modest moments--that I should be brought from
London, like a tailor to take orders, or a fellow to exhibit Punch, and
Judy--yet how could I reconcile it with the fitness of things, that
Professor Megalow should be tempted, with the very biggest dragon for
his bait, to come down, upon the really ignoble errand of flipping me
up, like a pith-ball of elder, between the plates positive and negative.
At first I thought of consulting him, as to what I should do in the
morning; for who else could advise me, so kindly, or so well? But I saw
that his counsel was not to be had, without a disclosure of everything;
and I had no right to tell him of his own "mission" here. So that on the
whole, I was compelled to act, (as I nearly always find to be the case
with me) by the dim light only of my own perceptions. "I have no right
to make any scene," I thought; "neither is it possible for me to leave
abruptly, without giving reason; Lady Twentifold has been most
wonderfully kind to me, ever since she first saw me; and she can have no
paltry political motive, such as this one-idea'd Roland has. And then
there is beautiful Laura, sweet Laura--I suppose I ought to call her
Miss Twentifold, but consider the years I have known her--there never
has been anybody like her, since the days of Paradise, and how
dreadfully rude I should appear to her! Of course, I must never think of
her at all, any more than I might of the pole-star. Still, I should like
her to think of me, if she ever deigns to do it, with all kindness and
good-will. Ah, ha! Lack is the luck! I am a most unhappy fellow. My
mother said once, that I had no right to be born; and who should know so
well as she?"
But before I had quite finished "doing my hair"--as the ladies express
it, and mine very often took almost as long as a lady's to do, because
of there being so much of it,--Sir Roland came thumping my dressing-room
door, and with his usual impetuosity, rushed in.
"Tommy, shake hands, like a man," he exclaimed, "or I'll pull all your
hair out of trim again. You cut up, as rough as a clinker, last night;
the first time I ever saw you out of temper. However, a new hope sprang
up in my breast. Do you know what you did, as you went along the
passage?"
"No. I remember nothing, except that I said to myself--'I am not a
machine, and I won't be treated as a machine. If he only wants me as a
Jack in the box----'"
"A Tommy in the box, you mean. No, no. You must lay aside all those
small ideas. It is not I that want you, it is your Country, your noble,
but outraged Fatherland. Those are the sentiments that should exalt you,
instead of petty wrath against your ancient friend. But I see a new
provision in the laws of gravitation--which Panclast will bring in a
bill to abolish, before we are very much older. In your anger, you tried
to stride loftily, as behoves the most illustrious of all coxswains; but
instead of so doing, you never touched the ground! You flitted, without
any coarse agency of legs; like the ghost of Achilles, at the great
deeds of his son."
"Well, I thought there was something unusual about it," I answered,
without any heroism; "but my mind was so occupied with its wrongs, that
I never noticed how I walked."
"That is another most excellent sign. Temporary absence of perception.
The main point will be, to enlarge the indignation--to ennoble it, to
make it national, instead of individual. Your course of reading at
Oxford--even though you read nothing there at all, except novels--has
produced, in your system, a fundamental change. In your early days,
exhilaration carried you over the heads of the public. You have seen too
much of the world by this time, to be exhilarated any more. Joy can no
more elevate you; and Nature (rejoicing as she does in exceptions) has
found a fresh way, to keep you in the list. But a perilous turn of the
balance for you, I am sadly afraid, dear Tommy. Joy is not frequent,
even in the days of boyhood. But indignation--oh, Tommy, Tommy, what a
lot of lead pipe you must carry round you, if you once become liable to
leave the earth, every time you see wrong being done upon it!"
"Clear out," said I; "I want to finish dressing, and not to be plagued
with immoral reflections. If you want to spare me all that lead pipe,
regulate your own conduct first, by the lofty standard you want to bring
me up to. That little business about Toggins, for instance, might force
me to put on a pound or two; though a lily-white act, in comparison with
the things you do at election-time."
To enter into that matter did not suit him, while in his present fine
vein of morality; so that he only made a face--being still a boy, as
much as I was--then he pulled in his tongue, and tapped his lips, and
said,
"Not a word about that, to the Professor, mind. I have boasted to him,
about the purity of everything; and he has promised to come and be
gratified. And gratified he shall be, by everything that is noble. Now
look alive! I shall have a busy day to-day. I mean to go canvassing,
though of course I need not do it. But I am sure, that the women would
be angry, if I didn't; and with this clash of changes coming, it is not
only wise, but necessary, to keep them on our side, as they are by
nature. If nothing else showed the Conservative cause to be the true
one, it would be enough that the women always take to it."
With this, which moved me a great deal more than the rest of his
arguments put together, he set off to shave himself, which he insisted
upon doing, now and then, with a competent eye to the future. And no
sooner was he gone, than I set to, to get everything about me into the
proper place, that I might not be taken, at breakfast-time, for a young
man at all of a Radical turn.
This made me late, though I had got up very early; earlier than any
other of the party, except Professor Megalow; and when I came in, he was
describing, with his usual clearness and quietness, the object of his
labours.
"It is still _in situ_, in the composite bed, none of which is of hard
material; and indeed it would be easier to extricate it perfect, if the
matrix were more consistent. We shall want a very careful hand to-day;
and at the same time, light feet under it. Unhappily, I am a little
above the proper scientific stature; neither can I any longer claim the
flexibility of my earlier days. Unless I can secure a very able
coadjutor, such as I once had the good luck to obtain, there will be
great risk of injuring one of the finest specimens of the noble
Deino-Saurians, I have ever had the fortune to behold. Let me try to
describe to you the exact position, which makes the extraction so
difficult."
This he did so well, that I could see the place; though without any idea
of the treasure it contained. He asked if he might take some dry toast,
and with it built up a rough resemblance of the cliff, and excavation;
then he lodged, in the back of the hole, three joints of a prawn, to
represent the relics of the monster, and shored up the crumbling of the
toast, with a stump of lead-pencil, and some sprigs of parsley.
"The position is rather precarious, you perceive," he said to Lady
Twentifold, and her daughter, who watched his frail structure with great
interest; "and of the people you sent most kindly, to help me yesterday
morning, intelligent as they were, and very obliging, there is not one
who goes into this bower, without some trembling, and a superstitious
awe. They are not so much afraid of the cliff falling on them, as of the
outrage they fancy they are doing, to some unknown gigantic power.
'Could he eat me, sir, if he come to life again?' the bravest and
biggest of them asked me; one of your under-keepers, I believe.
'Certainly he could, if he were carnivorous,' I was obliged to answer;
and that last word frightened them, beyond all former fear. Now, I could
extract this grand relic by myself, for I am not beneath average human
strength, if I ventured to make more headway; but you see that in
brittle material, such as this, I am afraid that the whole might fall
suddenly, and perhaps destroy the beauty of the specimen. And even
without that, I want another hand, most sadly; it need not be a very
strong one, for I would bear the weight of this--the heavier end; but it
must be a hand that does not shake, as I am sure the bold gamekeeper's
would."
"Why, I will come, and help you with the greatest pleasure," exclaimed
Sir Roland, "and obey every whisper. My canvass at Twentibury will do
to-morrow. This is of infinitely more importance."
"It is most kind of an eager politician," the Professor answered, with a
grateful smile, "to show such preference for the bygone world. But alas!
my dear friend, you are much too tall. There is no room for you, at that
end of the cave."
"Then, Professor Megalow, may I go with you?" Miss Twentifold asked,
with her lovely eyes sparkling. "I am not very strong; but my hand is
steady, and I should enjoy it so. Dear mother, say that I may go and
help. I would put on my shrimping-dress, and a thick cloak."
I could not help looking at her with alarm; while I did not yet like to
out-bid her for her wish. Lady Twentifold glanced at her with pride, but
serious misgivings about the risk. And the Professor firmly answered
"No!"
Being thus relieved, I was only too glad to offer my services, which
were at once accepted.
"Tommy is the lad cut out, by nature, for this very operation," the
Professor said kindly, as he took my hand, which was hardened by long
use of the rudder-lines; "he is a model of strength, so far as light
weight permits; and his lightness of touch has long been proved. If I
had my pick of the young men of England; for a job like this, I should
choose our Tommy."
"But I may come, and see it, without being in the way. I am sure Mamma
will let me do that," cried Laura; "and the Professor cannot be
hardhearted, if he tries. And I particularly want to go to Happystowe
to-day."
"If you will be burdened with her, she may go," Lady Twentifold said to
her visitor; "and I should like to join you in the afternoon, or meet
you perhaps upon your way back; for I must be at home, till two
o'clock."
Things were soon ready, and we three set off, in a light waggonette, for
Happystowe; and but for one thing, it would have been hard to say,
which of the three was the happiest. The Professor, with his bag of
sacred tools, was glowing with the prospect of a mighty prize, in his
special field of glory, and the tangible proof of his own inductions,
published in a treatise ten years ago. His fair companion was beaming
with the brightness of her own youth and beauty, and the joy of the air,
and of a day among the rocks, with her sketch-block and her
shrimping-net. But I, by reason of that one thing, I was happier than
three times three, or nine times nine of all their happiness. A fig for
the science, and the old dry bones, the traces of the lubbers that
deformed the earth--for they were too big only to disfigure it--till
beauty was created, to make them die of shame. And a fig even for the
blue sky, and gray sea, and brown rocks standing up to be painted; if
only I might watch Laura's face--without any token of doing so--catch
the glint of a smile that began far away, and sometimes receive to the
home of my heart a gaze of good-will, all intended for me.
I would gladly have dwelt in that happy waggonette, till all the old
dragons came to look for their bones, with Laura sitting by my side and
laughing, and often saying very simple things, and the Professor
opposite, to balance us, enjoying (as he always did) the company of the
young, and nodding in his humorous way, for me to explain to this young
lady some of his less recondite terms, as if I were an acolyte, at
least, of science. He did it on purpose, I am very well assured; because
he perceived the condition of my heart, and desired to promote it by the
action of the mind. Being steadfastly Liberal, and taking a very large
view of genealogy, he discovered no unfitness of things whatever, in my
tendency to a deep tenderness, towards a member of the race so far above
me.
But that most delicious drive was gone in no time, as everything
delicious is. We put up, of course, at the "_Twentifold Arms_," where
several of the maids remembered me, and Mrs. Roaker was most generous.
And it seemed to me one of the most delightful traits in the character
of Professor Megalow, that he should be so wholly wrapped up in his
tools, as to make it my duty to hand Miss Twentifold, down the three
steps of that fortunate carriage. She never said--"Oh no, thank you; I
have my bag to hold; and I can get down very well," as girls do
generally, whom it is a very small privilege to help down. But she gave
me her beautiful hand, with her beautiful foot on the step, and her
beautiful eyes for a moment met mine; so that altogether I was quite
overpowered with the sense of beauty, and--which is yet greater in the
end--of goodness.
The Professor's face wore a truly scientific air, as he noticed these
things, for nothing ever really escaped him; and he rubbed his nose
gently, as he gazed at the far offing, as if he had descried there a
palæozoic ship.