For three days Roland lay in his shabby lodgings, too ill to stir from
his bed; and but for the consciousness that, if he would accomplish his
purpose, he must rouse himself, and determine to rally, the probability
is that he would never have risen from it at all.
The effort must be made. His vitality, sadly impaired by a long course
of semi-starvation, must be restored by the contrary treatment. He was
not going to die in any such squalid hole as this, among the dirty and
repellant semblances of humanity, who, under the circumstances,
grudgingly ministered to his wants. Not he. He would get up; try
whether the air would set him on his legs again, and if so, would
certainly carry out his plan the very next day. His funds, considerably
replenished by the price of parting with his last, faithful friend,
would enable him to do this, only it must be done at once, and then--
afterwards! Well, he had a plan.
Rising with an effort from his bed, Roland proceeded to dress himself,
with infinite difficulty, for he felt wretchedly weak and dazed. Then
at the picture which his distorted and cracked mirror presented him
with, he fairly started. His beard, which he had allowed to grow at
will since his misfortunes, was now plentifully streaked with grey, and
with such alarming suddenness had this come about that he stared at his
reflected face in amazement. Then he remembered with sardonic
bitterness that this circumstance would yet further aid his plans. Who
would recognise him now?
It was afternoon when he sallied forth. With a pang he missed his
attached companion, and his sense of loneliness seemed enhanced tenfold.
The short winter day was already closing in, and a keen north-easter,
wafting particles of sleet from the black and riftless sky, chilled him
to the bone. Anything, though, rather than remain longer in the
frightful depression of his dingy rooms.
The dark sky and the winter gloom struck him as an earnest of what life
was to be henceforth. The pinched and sour expression on the
countenance of the British public struggling in the teeth of the biting
north-easter, reflected aptly the attitude of the world towards him who
is irrevocably down. Nothing was above a certain value--not even life,
for may not life itself be held on terms too hard?
His wanderings had brought him to Charing Cross, and walking a little
way up the Strand he turned into a well-known tavern to dine. Then it
occurred to him that he might as well look out a certain train.
But the A.B.C. time-table, requisite for this purpose, was not among the
resources of the establishment.
"Where can I get one, then?" he asked.
"We can send out for one, sir," said the waiter.
"Then do."
Not till an hour had passed was the A.B.C. put into his hands.
"Why the devil have you been so long about it?" he asked, rendered
irritable by the fatigue and excitement of the day, as he snatched it in
eager haste, and his hands trembled as he turned over the leaves.
"What the devil are you staring at now?" he cried, looking up and
meeting the glance of the waiter, who was watching him curiously. The
man muttered a word of apology and hastened away.
At length he found the train he wanted, put a mark against it, and
turned down the corner of the page. Then he fell into a profound
reverie. Suddenly he started up, paid his bill and hurried away.
"Tom," said the waiter who had attended on him, hailing a colleague.
"See that cove just gone out?"
"Yes."
"Should you know him again?"
"Swear to him anywhere," was the laconic reply.
"'E's a queer 'un. Look. 'E's left his time-table that he kicked up
such a blessed row about gettin'. Wonder where 'e's a-goin'. Look
'ere, it's turned down and marked."
At that moment Roland had suddenly come to a standstill in the street,
and like the proverbial Caledonian, was swearing "at large." For it had
dawned upon him that he had forgotten his A.B.C. Should he go back for
it? No; too far. He would get another.
But little he dreamed what gigantic importance to his weal or woe that
trivial act of forgetfulness would one day assume.
The cold was cutting, and just now a gust of driving sleet swept down
upon him, and in contrast he became aware of the glaring portico of a
variety theatre just in front. There at any rate he would be warm.
Once within, seated, with something to drink in front of him, and
smoking a cigar--the first for several long months--he gave himself up
to a sheer sense of warmth and physical comfort, which, combined with
the effects of the stimulants, produced a state of dreamy placidity. To
the performance he paid no attention whatever. Turn after turn was the
same, dull, tawdry, idiotic--but each intensely respectable in its
vulgar way.
Overcome by the stuffiness of the place, he went out for a little while.
On his return the house was in a ferment of excitement. The star
performer of the evening had just been on--and off; an athletic
exhibition apparently, as the attendants were removing a net and tight
rope, among other things; and a popular one, for some belated
hand-clapping was still going on. But for him it had no more interest
than had any of the others, nor did the overheard remarks made by those
in the neighbourhood--to the effect that they wouldn't have missed it
for anything--strike him with any overwhelming sense of loss. Then, as
the performance drew to an end, he made his way into the street.
The sleet showers had ceased, the wind had gone down, and the night,
clear and fine, was an agreeable contrast to the confined atmosphere and
garish interior of the theatre. Roland, threading the hurrying crowds
homeward-bound from the numerous places of entertainment, felt small
inclination to follow their example. He preferred the open air.
Strolling down Whitehall, unaware of a figure in a long ulster following
at some little distance behind, he reached Westminster Bridge. It
seemed very still and quiet here. The bridge was destitute of
passers-by, and the double crescent of lights twinkled like eyes upon
the dark waters. The tide was at ebb, and the black current swirled
beneath the piers with many a hiss and hollow gurgle, and the solitary
watcher felt chained to the spot by a weird and intangible fascination.
Just then, with sepulchral boom, "Great Tom" began tolling the hour of
midnight.
The pedestrian turned to retrace his steps. As he did so the figure in
the ulster stopped suddenly, and faced him. The move had been well
timed. Roland gave a great start, and stared in bewildered fashion upon
the face confronting him in the full glare of the lamplight, for he was
looking into the limpid blue eyes of Lizzie Devine.
"Well!" she said, and there was a flash of white teeth as the full lips
parted into a very attractive smile, which broadened into a little laugh
at the sudden and cold look of disapproval which had frozen up the
expression of the other's face. "That's right, think the worst of me,"
she went on. "Only, if you do, you happen to be wrong--though it's
little enough difference it would make to you, I should suppose, even if
you weren't."
"What on earth are you doing up here, Lizzie?" he said, ignoring the
"feeler."
"Left Cranston for good, eh?"
"Don't know. I left soon after you did, so can't give you all the
latest news, I'm afraid."
"There never is any down there, so that's no loss," he said with
affected carelessness. But not for a moment did it deceive the other,
and a great wave of pitiful tenderness welled up within her heart. She
had all the admiration of her class for "gameness," and now, as she
noted the ravages which ill-fortune and consequent ill-health had
wrought upon the appearance of this man, she needed none to tell her to
what depths of poverty he had dropped. Yet he carried it--for her
benefit at any rate--with the same careless ease as he had done the
enviable circumstances under which they had last met.
"Why did you go out just before my `turn,' and come back just after?"
she said. "Did you know it was me?"
"Your `turn'?" he repeated mystified. "Very sorry, but I don't quite
follow."
"You were in the Abracadabra the whole evening, and the only turn you
missed was mine."
He began to see. This, then, was Lizzie's line at present, yet how on
earth, under the absurd and Italianised stage-name on the programme,
even if it had attracted his attention at all, could he ever have
dreamed of looking for Lizzie Devine?
"Why, of course, I had no idea it was you," he said.
"Well, you see, you needn't have looked so black and suspicious at me.
I'm a first-rate draw there, I can tell you, and that's worth something
a week. And I've got other engagements sticking out that are better
still."
"I'm delighted to hear it, Lizzie. And--how well you're looking!"
"That's more than you are," she said quickly, the glow of pride and
pleasure evoked by the compliment from his lips giving way to a helpless
feeling of compunction and concern as she looked at him, the while in a
confused whirl her thoughts were chasing each other round and round.
She had heard enough of Cranston gossip to know what had happened
between General Dorrien and his eldest son, and now the appearance of
the latter, accidentally encountered after all this time, had enabled
her shrewdly to fill up the gap. What could she do? If only she could
help him. She had gone up in the world materially, and was going up
still more--not by reason of her performance, which was only average,
but by her rare physical attractiveness--and was commanding large
salaries. Yet withal, she had kept straight by reason of the memory of
the man talking with her here to-night; but ah! what a wreck he was
compared with his former self, and the reason thereof nobody was more
capable of appreciating. Yet she knew she was as powerless to help him
in the slightest degree as yon ragged tramp "singing" outside the
public-house over the road just before closing time; and that apart from
the certainty that now he only saw her as the daughter of a flagrantly
drunken and disreputable village rowdy.
"Getting late, isn't it?" he said, misinterpreting her silence. "We
might drop in somewhere and get a `split' or something before closing
time."
"We'll drop in and get something--yes," she answered decisively, "but
nowhere else than in my own place. You're not too proud, are you--
remembering old times on the other side? No, you can't be."
He laughed wearily. "I don't know. I'm not much up to conviviality
these days. I think I'll go and turn in. Fact is I'm beastly tired."
"Great Scott, but that's a fine girl!" said a voice behind, obviously
not intended to be heard by its object or her escort. "Wonder if she'll
be as disappointing as to the face."
"They generally are," said another.
There was that in the tone to make Roland Dorrien start. Three young
men in evening dress and crush hats overtook and passed them, and
simultaneously three heads came round to look at his companion. But one
head remained around a moment longer than the others, and it took in not
only the face of the girl but that of himself, and in it he beheld once
more the face of his brother Hubert. And it needed not the start the
latter gave to show that the recognition was not one-sided.