The proceedings of the council of the city of Milwaukee shows that the
aldermen are about to buy a stone crusher, to be run by steam, for the
purpose of crushing stones to be used on the streets. If the city has
never indulged in the luxury of a stone crusher, it should interview some
city that has owned one, before it closes a contract with any party that
wants to sell one. Every party that owns one does want to sell it.
Statistics show that. The first city in Wisconsin that bought one was
Madison. The city owned it for a year or two, and after that no man that
was in the council when it was bought could ever get in it again. The
mayor that winked at the purchase of the stone crusher was defeated, and
there was trouble. No person would ever say what was the matter, but you
say "stone crusher" to a citizen of Madison, and he would reach his right
hand around to his pistol pocket, and the conversation would cease.
La Crosse heard that Madison had a stone crusher, and so she wanted one.
La Crosse is bound to have anything that any other town has, whether it is
a railroad, an insane asylum, or a speckled hen. La Crosse could have
bought Madison's stone crusher at a discount, but she wanted one new, with
the paint all on, fresh. Second-hand stone crusher? Not any for La Crosse.
So the city ordered a brand new one, right from the mint, at an expense of
about $5,000.
The idea was that it would be about as big as a straw cutter, or a job
press, and people were anxious to see it work.
Finally the city was notified that one train of cars loaded with the stone
crusher had arrived, with red flags on, betokening extra trains running
wild behind, and the city was told to come down to the depot and pay the
first installment of freight, and take the stone crusher away--that part
of it that had arrived. The aldermen went down and took an
inventory of the hardware, and some of them went and jumped in the river.
At a cent a pound one can buy a good deal of cast iron for five thousand
dollars. The city bonded itself, and paid the freight, and during the
spring all of the trains loaded with the stone crusher arrived. It was
argued that the only way to get the stone crusher up to the city building
would be to give the railroad the right of way up town, right through Main
street.
Some were in favor of letting the railroad company keep it for freight,
but the company threatened to get out an injunction on the city. Finally a
man who took contracts to move brick buildings agreed to move it up town
on shares, and during the summer the most of it was got up there and
corded up on some vacant lots. If all the cast iron in it came out of one
mine it must have been an immense mine. People would look at it and weep.
Every alderman swore he voted against buying it. Occasionally some one in
the council would suggest that the stone crusher be taken out to the
bluffs, a couple of miles, and set to work, when another one would move,
to amend by inserting a clause that the bluffs be moved into the city to
be crushed, as it would save expense. Then the matter would drop. For
three years that stone crusher stood there, and it never crushed a pebble.
New mayors and aldermen were elected, and every day they passed that
crusher, but they never spoke to it. Finally a job was put up to get rid
of it. There was a man there who owned a stone quarry, and it occurred to
somebody to sell it to him. He was a truly good man, and did not believe
there were any bad men in the world, who would kanoodle him with a stone
crusher. A committee was appointed to sell it to him. The committee was
composed of men who had traded horses, sold lightning rods, and been
insurance agents, and when they told the poor man that the city had
noticed that he was a deserving man, that they had decided to
help him along, and would sell him that stone crusher, and he could pay
for it in crushed stone, and the city would pay him in cash half a dollar
more than the stone was worth, he said he would take it. They got it on to
him by buying crushed stone of him and paying cash for it.
We have never heard whether the man lived or not, and have never heard
whether the city bought any stone of him, but the city got rid of it, and
then had a celebration. Why, they figured it up, and the thing could crush
enough stone in twenty-four hours to pave the streets a foot thick all
over town and thirteen miles in the country. To run it a week would
bankrupt the State of Wisconsin, It could go up to the stone quarry and
tunnel a hole right through the hill. It was the biggest elephant that
ever a city drew in a legalized lottery. Milwaukee will make money if she
does not buy a stone crusher, not as long as it can buy stone in the
rough, and have it crushed by tramps, at nothing a day.