The Presbyterian synod at Erie, Pa., has turned a lawyer named Donaldson
out of the church. The charge against him was not that he was a lawyer, as
might be supposed, but that he had danced a quadrille. It does not seem to
us as though there could be anything more harmless than dancing a cold
blooded quadrille. It is a simple walk around, and is not even exercise.
Of course a man can, if he chooses, get in extra steps enough to keep his
feet warm, but we contend that no quadrille, where they only touch hands,
go down in the middle, and alamand left, can work upon a man's religion
enough to cause him to backslide.
If it was this new "waltz quadrille" that Donaldson indulged in, where
there is intermittant hugging, and where the head gets to whirling, and a
man has to hang on to his partner quite considerable, to keep from falling
all over himself, and where she looks up fondly into his eyes and as
though telling him to squeeze just as hard as it seemed necessary for his
convenience, we should not wonder so much at the synod hauling him over
the coals for cruelty to himself, but a cold quadrille has no deviltry in
it.
We presume the wicked and perverse Dr. Donaldson will join another church
that allows dancing judiciously administered, and may yet get to heaven
ahead of the Presbyterian synod, and he may be elected to some high
position there, as Arthur was here, after the synod of Hayes and Sherman
had bounced him from the Custom House for dancing the great spoils walk
around.
It is often the case here, and we do not know why it may not be in heaven,
that the ones that are turned over and shook up, and the dust knocked out
of them, and their metaphorical coat tail filled with boots, find that the
whirligig of time has placed them above the parties who smote
them, and we can readily believe that if Donaldson gets a first-class
position of power, above the skies, he will make it decidedly warm for his
persecutors when they come up to the desk with their gripsacks and
register and ask for a room and a bath, and a fire escape. He will be apt
to look up to the key rack and tell them everything is full, but they can
find pretty fair accommodations at the other house, down at the Hot
Springs, on the European plan, by Mr. Devil, formerly of Chicago.