LADY BLANDISH TO AUSTIN WENTWORTH
"His ordeal is over. I have just come from his room and seen him
bear the worst that could be. Return at once--he has asked for you.
I can hardly write intelligibly, but I will tell you what we know.
"Two days after the dreadful night when he left us, his father heard
from Ralph Morton. Richard had fought a duel in France with Lord
Mountfalcon, and was lying wounded at a hamlet on the coast. His
father started immediately with his poor wife, and I followed in
company with his aunt and his child. The wound was not dangerous. He
was shot in the side somewhere, but the ball injured no vital part.
We thought all would be well. Oh! how sick I am of theories, and
Systems, and the pretensions of men! There was his son lying all but
dead, and the man was still unconvinced of the folly he had been
guilty of. I could hardly bear the sight of his composure. I shall
hate the name of Science till the day I die. Give me nothing but
commonplace unpretending people!
"They were at a wretched French cabaret, smelling vilely, where we
still remain, and the people try as much as they can do to
compensate for our discomforts by their kindness. The French poor
people are very considerate where they see suffering. I will say
that for them. The doctors had not allowed his poor Lucy to go near
him. She sat outside his door, and none of us dared disturb her.
That was a sight for Science. His father and myself, and Mrs. Berry,
were the only ones permitted to wait on him, and whenever we came
out, there she sat, not speaking a word--for she had been told it
would endanger his life--but she looked such awful eagerness. She
had the sort of eye I fancy mad persons have. I was sure her reason
was going. We did everything we could think of to comfort her. A bed
was made up for her and her meals were brought to her there. Of
course there was no getting her to eat. What do you suppose _his_
alarm was fixed on? He absolutely said to me--but I have not
patience to repeat his words. He thought her to blame for not
_commanding_ herself for the sake of her _maternal duties_. He had
absolutely an idea of insisting that she should make an effort to
suckle the child. I shall love that Mrs. Berry to the end of my
days. I really believe she has _twice_ the sense of any of
us--Science and all. She asked him plainly if he wished to poison
the child, and then he gave way, but with a bad grace.
"Poor man! perhaps I am hard on him. I remember that you said
Richard had done wrong. Yes; well, that may be. But his father
eclipsed his wrong in a greater wrong--a crime, or quite as bad; for
if he deceived himself in the belief that he was acting righteously
in separating husband and wife, and exposing his son as he did, I
can only say that there are some who are worse than people who
deliberately commit _crimes_. No doubt Science will benefit by it.
They kill little animals for the sake of Science.
"We have with us Doctor Bairam, and a French physician from Dieppe,
a very skilful man. It was he who told us where the real danger lay.
We thought all would be well. A week had passed, and no fever
supervened. We told Richard that his wife was coming to him, and he
could bear to hear it. I went to her and began to circumlocute,
thinking she listened--she had the same eager look. When I told her
she might go in with me to see her dear husband, her features did
not change. M. Despres, who held her pulse at the time, told me, in
a whisper, it was cerebral fever--brain fever coming on. We have
talked of her since. I noticed that though she did not seem to
understand me, her bosom heaved, and she appeared to be trying to
repress it, and choke something. I am sure now, from what I know of
her character, that she--even in the approaches of delirium--was
preventing herself from crying out. Her last hold of reason was a
thought for Richard. It was against a creature like this that we
plotted! I have the comfort of knowing that I did my share in
helping to destroy her. Had she seen her husband a day or two
before--but no! there was a new _System_ to interdict that! Or had
she not so violently controlled her nature as she did, I believe she
might have been saved.
"He said once of a man, that his conscience was a coxcomb. Will you
believe that when he saw his son's wife--poor victim! lying
delirious, he could not even then see his error. You said he wished
to take Providence out of God's hands. His mad self-deceit would not
leave him. I am positive, that while he was standing over her, he
was blaming her for not having considered the child. Indeed he made
a remark to me that it was unfortunate--'disastrous,' I think he
said--that the child should have to be fed by hand. I dare say it
is. All I pray is that this young child may be saved from him. I
cannot bear to see him look on it. He does not spare himself
_bodily_ fatigue--but what is that? that is the vulgarest form of
love. I know what you will say. You will say I have lost all
charity, and I have. But I should not feel so, Austin, if I could be
_quite sure_ that he is an altered man even now the blow has struck
him. He is reserved and simple in his speech, and his grief is
evident, but I have doubts. He heard her while she was senseless
call him cruel and harsh, and cry that she had suffered, and I saw
then his mouth contract as if he had been touched. Perhaps, when he
thinks, his mind will be clearer, but what he has done cannot be
undone. I do not imagine he will abuse women any more. The doctor
called her a 'forte et belle jeune femme:' and _he_ said she was as
noble a soul as ever God moulded clay upon. A noble soul 'forte et
belle!' She lies upstairs. If he can look on her and not see his
_sin_, I almost fear God will never enlighten him.
"She died five days after she had been removed. The shock had
utterly deranged her. I was with her. She died very quietly,
breathing her last breath without pain--asking for no one--a death I
should like to die.
"Her cries at one time were dreadfully loud. She screamed that she
was 'drowning in fire,' and that her husband would not come to her
to save her. We deadened the sound as much as we could, but it was
impossible to prevent Richard from hearing. He knew her voice, and
it produced an effect like fever on him. Whenever she called he
answered. You could not hear them without weeping. Mrs. Berry sat
with her, and I sat with him, and his father moved from one to the
other.
"But the trial for us came when she was gone. How to communicate it
to Richard--or whether to do so at all! His father consulted with
us. We were quite decided that it would be madness to breathe it
while he was in that state. I can admit now--as things have turned
out--we were wrong. His father left us--I believe he spent the time
in prayer--and then leaning on me, he went to Richard, and said in
so many words, that his Lucy was no more. I thought it must kill
him. He listened, and smiled. I never saw a smile so sweet and so
sad. He said he had seen her die, as if he had passed through his
suffering a long time ago. He shut his eyes. I could see by the
motion of his eyeballs up that he was straining his sight to some
inner heaven.--I cannot go on.
"I think Richard is safe. Had we postponed the tidings, till he came
to his clear senses, it must have killed him. His father was right
for once, then. But if he has saved his son's body, he has given the
death-blow to his heart. Richard will never be what he promised.
"A letter found on his clothes tells us the origin of the quarrel. I
have had an interview with Lord M. this morning. I cannot say I
think him exactly to blame: Richard forced him to fight. At least I
do not select him the foremost for blame. He was deeply and
sincerely affected by the calamity he has caused. Alas! he was only
an instrument. Your poor aunt is utterly prostrate and talks strange
things of her daughter's death. She is only happy in _drudging_. Dr.
Bairam says we must under any circumstances keep her employed.
Whilst she is doing something, she can chat freely, but the moment
her hands are not occupied she gives me an idea that she is going
into a fit.
"We expect the dear child's uncle to-day. Mr. Thompson is here. I
have taken him upstairs to look at her. That poor young man has a
true heart.
"Come at once. You will not be in time to see her. She will lie at
Raynham. If you could you would see an angel. _He_ sits by her side
for hours. I can give you no description of her beauty.
"You will not delay, I know, dear Austin, and I want you, for your
presence will make me more charitable than I find it possible to be.
Have you noticed the expression in the eyes of blind men? That is
just how Richard looks, as he lies there silent in his bed--striving
to image her on his brain."
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TRANSCRIBER'S NOTES
1. Passages in italics are indicated by _underscore_.
2. Passages in bold are indicated by =.
3. Other than the corrections listed below, printer's inconsistencies
in spelling, punctuation and hyphenation usage have been retained:
Pg. 3 "Feveral" corrected to "Feverel" (Hippias Feverel)
Pg. 25 "run" corrected to "rung" (bell was rung)
Pg. 38 "pursuade" corrected to "persuade" (persuade her to disrobe)
Pg. 44 "Said" corrected to "said" (coward?" said)
Pg. 52 "Feveral" corrected to "Feverel" (a Feverel asking this)
Pg. 75 "Parliment" corrected to "Parliament" (hero of our Parliament,)
Pg. 119 "agree" corrected to "agrees" (it agrees with me)
Pg. 455 "sparating" corrected to "separating" (in separating)
End of Project Gutenberg's The Ordeal of Richard Feverel, by George Meredith