"Well, can't you speak? Isn't it you who wrote to me?"
"Yes, sire; but now I can't remember what I had to say. I did not
think the majesty of a king could so dazzle my senses. I shall be
better prepared in future. My lord marshal ought to have warned me."
"Ah! he knows you, does he? Come, let us walk about. What did you wish
to say? What do you think of this garden?"
He ordered me to speak of his garden! I should have said I knew
nothing of gardens to any one else, but if he chose to think me a
connoisseur I must fain pretend to be one. At the risk of exposing my
ignorance, I replied that it was superb.
"But," he said, "the gardens at Versailles are far finer."
"I own it, sire; but that is because of the fountains."
"True; but it is not my fault. There is no water here. I have spent
more than three hundred thousand crowns, but without success."
"Three hundred thousand crowns, sire! If your majesty spent that sum,
there should have been abundance of water."
"Ah! ah! I see you are a hydraulic architect."
Could I tell him he was mistaken? I was afraid of displeasing him, so
I simply bent my head. This could be taken for yes or no. Thank God,
he did not continue to talk on this subject, or I should have been
terribly put to it, for I did not know the very rudiments of
hydraulics.
Still walking up and down, and turning his head right and left, he
asked me what the Venetian forces, naval and military, amounted to.
Now I was on my own ground. "Twenty men of war, sire, and a large
number of galleys."
"And what land forces?"
"Seventy thousand men, sire, all subjects of the republic, and
counting all that, only one man from each village."
"That is not true. I suppose you want to amuse me with your fables.
You must be a financier; tell me, what do you think of the taxes?"
This was the first interview I had ever had with royalty. Considering
his style, his abrupt change of subject, and his sudden digressions, I
felt as tho I had been called on to act in one of those improvised
Italian comedies in which, if the actor stops short for a word, the
pit and the gallery hiss him mercilessly. I immediately assumed the
style of a financier, and replied that I was acquainted with the
theory of taxation.
"That is what I want," he replied, "for the practise does not concern
you."
"There are three kinds of taxes, taking into consideration their
effects: one is ruinous, one is unfortunately necessary, and the third
is always excellent."
"That is good; go on."
"The ruinous tax is the royal tax; the necessary one is the military
one; and the excellent one is the popular tax."
I wanted to throw him off his beat a little, as I had not got up my
subject.
"The royal tax, sire, is the one which empties the purses of the
subjects to swell the coffers of the sovereign."
"And that is the ruinous one, you say?"
"Always, sire, for it stops the circulation of money, which is the
soul of commerce and the backbone of the state."
"Yet, you consider the army tax necessary?"
"Unfortunately necessary, for war is a dire calamity."
"Perhaps. And how about the popular tax?"
"It is always excellent, for what the king takes from his people with
one hand, he gives them back with the other, turning it into useful
channels, protecting science and art, and so contributing to the
general social well-being; in fact, the king adds to general happiness
by employing the money drawn from the taxes as his wisdom dictates."
"There is a good deal of truth in what you say. No doubt you know
Calsabigi?"
"I ought to know him, sire, for we established the Genoese lottery in
Paris together, seven years ago."
"And under what head would you class that tax, if you admit it to be
one?"
"It is one, sire, and not one of the least important. It is a good
tax, if the king spends the profits in a useful manner."
"But supposing he loses?"
"One chance in fifty, sire."
"Is that the result of an exact calculation?"
"As exact, sire, as all political calculations."
"They are often wrong."
"They are never wrong, sire, if God remains neutral."
"Why drag the Deity into such a question?"
"Let us say then, sire, luck, or destiny."
"That is better. Perhaps I agree with you about the moral
calculations, but I do not like your Genoese lottery. It seems to me a
mere swindle, and I would not have anything to do with it, even if I
were certain to win always."
"Your majesty is right, for the public would never support lotteries
were they not led away by false security."
Then he tried one or two other points, but I met him without
flinching. Suddenly he stopt short and looked me over from head to
foot.
"Do you know that you are a very handsome man?"
"Is it possible, sire, that after a long scientific dissertation,
your majesty can credit me with merely the qualities which distinguish
your majesty's grenadiers?"
The king smiled with kind malice, then said: "As it seems that Lord
Keith knows you, I will speak to him about you."
He then took off his hat again, for he was never chary of his bows,
and I, making him a profound reverence, withdrew.
Three or four days after the lord marshal told me the king was very
pleased with me, and had said he would try and find me something to
do.