A ROGUE'S MEMOIRS.

One is often tempted of the Devil to forswear the study of history

altogether as the pursuit of the Unknowable. 'How is it possible,'

he whispers in our ear, as we stand gloomily regarding the portly

calf-bound volumes without which no gentleman's library is complete,

'how is it possible to suppose that you have there, on your shelves--the

actual facts of history--a true record of what men, dead long ago, felt

and thought?' Yet, if we have not, I for one, though of a literary

turn, would sooner spend my leisure playing skittles with boors than in

reading sonorous lies in stout volumes.

'It is not so much,' wilily insinuates the Tempter, 'that these renowned

authors lack knowledge. Their habit of giving an occasional reference

(though the verification of these is usually left to the malignancy of a

rival and less popular historian) argues at least some reading. No; what

is wanting is ignorance, carefully acquired and studiously maintained.

This is no paradox. To carry the truisms, theories, laws, language of

to-day, along with you in your historical pursuits, is to turn the muse

of history upside down--a most disrespectful proceeding--and yet to

ignore them--to forget all about them--to hang them up with your hat

and coat in the hall, to remain there whilst you sit in the library

composing your immortal work, which is so happily to combine all that

is best in Gibbon and Macaulay--a sneerless Gibbon and an impartial

Macaulay--is a task which, if it be not impossible is, at all events, of

huge difficulty.

Another blemish in English historical work has been noticed by the

Rev. Charles Kingsley, and may therefore be referred to by me without

offence. Your standard historians, having no unnatural regard for their

most indefatigable readers, the wives and daughters of England, feel it

incumbent upon them to pass over, as unfit for dainty ears and dulcet

tones, facts, and rumours of facts, which none the less often determined

events by stirring the strong feelings of your ancestors, whose conduct,

unless explained by this light, must remain enigmatical.

When, to these anachronisms of thought and omissions of fact, you have

added the dishonesty of the partisan historian and the false glamour

of the picturesque one, you will be so good as to proceed to find the

present value of history!'

Thus far the Enemy of Mankind:

An admirable lady orator is reported lately to have 'brought down'

Exeter Hall by observing, 'in a low but penetrating voice,' that the

Devil was a very stupid person. It is true that Ben Jonson is on the

side of the lady, but I am far too orthodox to entertain any such

opinion; and though I have, in this instance of history, so far resisted

him as to have refrained from sending my standard historians to the

auction mart--where, indeed, with the almost single exception of Mr.

Grote's History of Greece (the octavo edition in twelve volumes), prices

rule so low as to make cartage a consideration--I have still of late

found myself turning off the turnpike of history to loiter down the

primrose paths of men's memoirs of themselves and their times.

Here at least, so we argue, we are comparatively safe. Anachronisms of

thought are impossible; omissions out of regard for female posterity

unlikely, and as for party spirit, if found, it forms part of what

lawyers call the _res gestae_, and has therefore a value of its own.

Against the perils of the picturesque, who will insure us?

But when we have said all this, and, sick of prosing, would begin

reading, the number of really readable memoirs is soon found to be but

few. This is, indeed, unfortunate; for it launches us off on another

prose-journey by provoking the question, What makes memoirs interesting?

Is it necessary that they should be the record of a noble character?

Certainly not. We remember Pepys, who--well, never mind what he does.

We call to mind Cellini; _he_ runs behind a fellow-creature, and with

'admirable address' sticks a dagger in the nape of his neck, and long

afterwards records the fact, almost with reverence, in his life's story.

Can anything be more revolting than some portions of the revelation

Benjamin Franklin was pleased to make of himself in writing? And what

about Rousseau? Yet, when we have pleaded guilty for these men, a modern

Savonarola, who had persuaded us to make a bonfire of their works, would

do well to keep a sharp look-out, lest at the last moment we should

be found substituting 'Pearson on the Creed' for Pepys, Coleridge's

'Friend' for Cellini, John Foster's Essays for Franklin, and Roget's

Bridgewater Treatise for Rousseau.

Neither will it do to suppose that the interest of a memoir depends on

its writer having been concerned in great affairs, or lived in stirring

times. The dullest memoirs written even in English, and not excepting

those maimed records of life known as 'religious biography,' are the

work of men of the 'attaché' order, who, having been mixed up in events

which the newspapers of the day chronicled as 'Important Intelligence,'

were not unnaturally led to cherish the belief that people would like to

have from their pens full, true and particular accounts of all that

then happened, or, as they, if moderns, would probably prefer to say,

transpired. But the World, whatever an over-bold Exeter Hall may say of

her old associate the Devil, is not a stupid person, and declines to

be taken in twice; and turning a deaf ear to the most painstaking and

trustworthy accounts of deceased Cabinets and silenced Conferences, goes

journeying along her broad way, chuckling over some old joke in Boswell,

and reading with fresh delight the all-about-nothing letters of Cowper

and Lamb.

How then does a man--be he good or bad--big or little--a philosopher or

a fribble--St. Paul or Horace Walpole--make his memoirs interesting?

To say that the one thing needful is individuality, is not quite enough.

To be an individual is the inevitable, and in most cases the unenviable,

lot of every child of Adam. Each one of us has, like a tin soldier, a

stand of his own. To have an individuality is no sort of distinction,

but to be able to make it felt in writing is not only distinction but

under favouring circumstances immortality.

Have we not all some correspondents, though probably but few, from whom

we never receive a letter without feeling sure that we shall find inside

the envelope something written that will make us either glow with the

warmth or shiver with the cold of our correspondent's life? But how many

other people are to be found, good, honest people too, who no sooner

take pen in hand than they stamp unreality on every word they write. It

is a hard fate, but they cannot escape it. They may be as literal as the

late Earl Stanhope, as painstaking as Bishop Stubbs, as much in earnest

as the Prime Minister--their lives may be noble, their aims high, but no

sooner do they seek to narrate to us their story, than we find it is not

to be. To hearken to them is past praying for. We turn from them as from

a guest who has outstayed his welcome. Their writing wearies, irritates,

disgusts.

Here then, at last, we have the two classes of memoir writers--those who

manage to make themselves felt, and those who do not. Of the latter, a

very little is a great deal too much--of the former we can never have

enough.

What a liar was Benvenuto Cellini!--who can believe a word he says? To

hang a dog on his oath would be a judicial murder. Yet when we lay down

his Memoirs and let our thoughts travel back to those far-off days he

tells us of, there we see him standing, in bold relief, against the

black sky of the past, the very man he was. Not more surely did he, with

that rare skill of his, stamp the image of Clement VII. on the papal

currency than he did the impress of his own singular personality upon

every word he spoke and every sentence he wrote.

We ought, of course, to hate him, but do we? A murderer he has written

himself down. A liar he stands self-convicted of being. Were anyone

in the nether world bold enough to call him thief, it may be doubted

whether Rhadamanthus would award him the damages for which we may be

certain he would loudly clamour. Why do we not hate him? Listen to him:

'Upon my uttering these words, there was a general outcry, the noblemen

affirming that I promised too much. But one of them, who was a great

philosopher, said in my favour, "From the admirable symmetry of shape

and happy physiognomy of this young man, I venture to engage that he

will perform all he promises, and more." The Pope replied, "I am of the

same opinion;" then calling Trajano, his gentleman of the bed-chamber,

he ordered him to fetch me five hundred ducats.'

And so it always ended; suspicions, aroused most reasonably, allayed

most unreasonably, and then--ducats. He deserved hanging, but he died

in his bed. He wrote his own memoirs after a fashion that ought to have

brought posthumous justice upon him, and made them a literary gibbet, on

which he should swing, a creaking horror, for all time; but nothing

of the sort has happened. The rascal is so symmetrical, and his

physiognomy, as it gleams upon us through the centuries, so happy, that

we cannot withhold our ducats, though we may accompany the gift with a

shower of abuse.

This only proves the profundity of an observation made by Mr. Bagehot--a

man who carried away into the next world more originality of thought

than is now to be found in the Three Estates of the Realm. Whilst

remarking upon the extraordinary reputation of the late Francis Horner

and the trifling cost he was put to in supporting it, Mr. Bagehot said

that it proved the advantage of 'keeping an atmosphere.'

The common air of heaven sharpens men's judgments. Poor Horner, but for

that kept atmosphere of his, always surrounding him, would have been

bluntly asked, 'What he had done since he was breeched,' and in reply

he could only have muttered something about the currency. As for our

especial rogue Cellini, the question would probably have assumed this

shape: 'Rascal, name the crime you have not committed, and account for

the omission.'

But these awkward questions are not put to the lucky people who keep

their own atmospheres. The critics, before they can get at them, have

to step out of the everyday air, where only achievements count and the

Decalogue still goes for something, into the kept atmosphere, which they

have no sooner breathed than they begin to see things differently,

and to measure the object thus surrounded with a tape of its

own manufacture. Horner--poor, ugly, a man neither of words nor

deeds--becomes one of our great men; a nation mourns his loss and erects

his statue in the Abbey. Mr. Bagehot gives several instances of the same

kind, but he does not mention Cellini, who is, however, in his own way,

an admirable example.

You open his book--a Pharisee of the Pharisees. Lying indeed! Why, you

hate prevarication. As for murder, your friends know you too well to

mention the subject in your hearing, except in immediate connection with

capital punishment. You are, of course, willing to make some allowance

for Cellini's time and place--the first half of the sixteenth century

and Italy. 'Yes,' you remark, 'Cellini shall have strict justice at my

hands.' So you say as you settle yourself in your chair and begin to

read. We seem to hear the rascal laughing in his grave. His spirit

breathes upon you from his book--peeps at you roguishly as you turn the

pages. His atmosphere surrounds you; you smile when you ought to frown,

chuckle when you should groan, and--O final triumph!--laugh aloud when,

if you had a rag of principle left, you would fling the book into the

fire. Your poor moral sense turns away with a sigh, and patiently awaits

the conclusion of the second volume.

How cautiously does he begin, how gently does he win your ear by his

seductive piety! I quote from Mr. Roscoe's translation:--

'It is a duty incumbent on upright and credible men of all ranks, who

have performed anything noble or praiseworthy, to record, in their own

writing, the events of their lives; yet they should not commence this

honourable task before they have passed their fortieth year. Such, at

least, is my opinion, now that I have completed my fifty-eighth year,

and am settled in Florence, where, considering the numerous ills that

constantly attend human life, I perceive that I have never before been

so free from vexations and calamities, or possessed of so great a share

of content and health as at this period. Looking back on some

delightful and happy events of my life, and on many misfortunes so truly

overwhelming that the appalling retrospect makes me wonder how I have

reached this age in vigour and prosperity, through God's goodness I have

resolved to publish an account of my life; and ... I must, in commencing

my narrative, satisfy the public on some few points to which its

curiosity is usually directed; the first of which is to ascertain

whether a man is descended from a virtuous and ancient family.... I

shall therefore now proceed to inform the reader how it pleased God that

I should come into the world.'

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