He found her sitting in a great arm-chair at one end of the empty
billiard-room. She did not rise to meet him. He thought she looked tired
out and frightened.
He went to her and stooped over her, taking her hands. She did not resist
him, but neither did she welcome. Her lips were quivering painfully.
"What have I done that you should run away from me?" Merefleet asked her
very gently.
She shook her head with a helpless gesture.
"Mr. Merefleet," she whispered, "try--try not to be cross any! I'm afraid
I've made a big mistake."
"My dear, we all make them," Merefleet said with grave kindliness.
"I know," she faltered. "I know. But mine was a real bad one."
"Never mind, child!" he said tenderly. "Why should you tell me?"
She threw a swift look into his face. She was trembling violently.
"Big Bear," she cried with sudden vehemence, "you don't understand."
He knelt down beside her and put his arm about her.
"Listen to me, my darling," he said, and she shrank at the deep thrill in
his voice. "To me you are all that is beautiful and good and holy. I do
not want to know what lies behind you. I know you have had trouble. But
it is over. You may have made mistakes. But they are over, too. Tell me
nothing! Leave the past alone! Only give me your present and your future.
I shall be quite content."
He paused. She was shivering within his encircling arm. He could hear her
breath coming and going very quickly.
"You love me, darling," he said. "And is it necessary for me to tell you
that I worship you as no one ever has worshipped you before?"
He paused again. But Mab did not speak. The beautiful face was working
painfully. Her hands were tightly clasped in his.
"Child, what is it?" Merefleet said, conscious of a hidden barrier
between them. "Can't you trust yourself to me? Is that it? Are you afraid
of me? You didn't shrink from me yesterday."
She bowed her head. Yesterday she had wept in his arms. But to-day no
tears came. Only a halting whisper, a woman's cry of sheer weakness.
"Don't tempt me, Big Bear!" she murmured. "Oh, don't tempt me! I am
not--free!"
Merefleet's face grew stern.
"You did not say that yesterday," he said.
She heard the change in his tone, and looked up. She was better able to
meet this from him.
"I know," she said. "And I guess that was where I went wrong. I ought to
have waited till we were dead. But, you see, I didn't know."
"Then do you tell me you are not free?" Merefleet said. "Do you mean
literally that? Are you the actual property of another man?"
She shook her head with baffling promptitude.
"I guess I'm just Death's property, Big Bear," she said, with a wistful
little smile. "But he doesn't seem over-keen on having me."
"Stop!" said Merefleet harshly. "I won't have you talk like that. It's
madness. Tell me what you mean!"
"I can't," Mab said. "I can't tell you. It wouldn't be fair. Don't be
angry, Big Bear! It's just the price I've got to pay. And it's no use
squirming. I've worried it round and round. But it always comes back to
that. I'm not free. And no one but Bert must ever know why."
Merefleet sprang to his feet with an impatience by no means
characteristic of him.
"This is intolerable!" he exclaimed. "You are wrecking your life for an
insane scruple. Child, listen! Tell me nothing whatever! Give yourself
to me! No one shall ever take you away again. That I swear. And I will
make you so happy, dear. Only trust me!"
But Mab covered her face as if to shut out a forbidden sight.
"Big Bear, I mustn't," she said, with a sharp catch in her voice. "I've
done very wrong already. But I mustn't do this. Indeed I mustn't. It's
real good of you. And I shall remember it all my life. I think you are
the most charitable man I ever met, considering what you must think of
me."
"Think!" said Merefleet, and there was a note of deep passion in his
voice. "I don't think. I want you just as you are,--just as you are.
Don't you know yet that I love you enough for that?"
Mab rose slowly at the words. She was very pale, and he could see her
trembling as she stood.
"Big Bear," she said, "I've got something to say to you. What I told you
yesterday was quite true. And I'm in great trouble about it. I thought we
were going to Heaven together. That was how I came to say it. But it was
very wicked of me to be so impulsive. I've done other things that were
wicked in just the same way. It's just my nature. And p'r'aps you'll try
to forgive me when you think how I truly meant it. I'm telling you this
because I want you to do something for me. It'll be real difficult, Big
Bear. Only you're so strong."
She faltered a little and paused to recover herself. Merefleet was
standing close to her. He could have taken her into his arms. But
something held him back. Moreover he knew the nature of her request
before she uttered it.
"Will you do what I ask you?" she said suddenly, facing him directly.
"Will you, Big Bear?"
Merefleet did not answer her.
She went on quickly.
"My dear, it's hard for me, too, though I'm bad and I deserve to suffer."
Her voice broke and Merefleet made a convulsive movement towards her. But
he checked himself. And Mab ended in a choked whisper with an appealing
hand against his breast.
"Just go right away!" she said. "Take up your life where it was before
you met me! Will you, dear? It--will make it easier for me if you will."
A dead silence followed the low words. Then, moved by a marvellous
influence which worked upon him irresistibly, Merefleet stooped and put
the slight hand to his lips. He did not understand. He was as far from
reading the riddle as he had been when he entered. But his love for this
woman conquered his desire. He had thought to win an empire. He left the
room a beaten slave.