SEMI-AMBUSTUS EVASIT.
Are you curious to know how, all this while, it fared with the Great
Earl and his beautiful bride? If the truth is to be told, I fear the
answer must be unsatisfactory. No one, well acquainted with the
contracting parties, believed that the marriage would be a _very_ happy
one; but they hoped it would turn out as well as the generality of
conventional alliances. It was not so. Alan Wyverne was right enough in
thinking that Clydesdale was most unfitted to the task of managing a
haughty, wilful wife; but even he never supposed that dissension would
arise so quickly, and rankle so constantly. There had been few overt or
actual disputes, but a spirit of bitter antagonism was ever at work,
which sooner or later was certain to have an evil ending.
It would be unfair in infer that the fault was all on the Earl's side.
It was his manner and demeanour that told most against him: he had been
so accustomed to adulation from both sexes, that he could not understand
why his wife should not accept his dictatorial and overbearing ways, as
patiently as his other dependents: so even his kindnesses were spoilt by
the way in which they were offered, or rather enforced. But--at all
events, in the early days of their married life--he was really anxious
that not a wish or whim of Helen's should remain ungratified, and spared
neither trouble nor money to insure this.
The fair Countess was certainly not free from blame. She had said to
Maud Brabazon--"I will try honestly to be a good wife, if he will let
me." Now, her most partial friend could hardly assert, that she had
fairly acted up to this good resolve. Perhaps it would have been too
much to expect that she should entertain a high respect or a devoted
affection for her consort; but she might have masked indifference more
considerately, or, at least, have dissembled disdain. Her hasty,
impetuous nature seemed utterly changed; she never by any chance lost
her temper now, at any provocation, especially when such came from her
husband. It would have been much better if she _had_ done so,
occasionally: nothing chafes a character like Clydesdale's so bitterly,
as that imperial _nonchalance_, which seems to waver between contempt
and pity. Besides, her notions of conjugal obedience were rather
peculiar. The Earl was, at first, perpetually interfering with her
arrangements, by suggestions for or against, which sounded unpleasantly
like orders; if these chanced to square with Helen's inclination, or if
the question was simply indifferent to her, she acted upon them, without
claiming any credit for so doing; if otherwise--she disregarded and
disobeyed them with a serene determination, and seemed to think, "having
changed her mind since she saw him," quite a sufficient apology to her
exasperated Seigneur.
An incident very characteristic of this had, somehow, got abroad.
Lady Clydesdale was about to accompany her husband to a tremendous
State-dinner, the host being one of the great personages in this realm,
next to royalty--no other than the Duke of Camelot. When she came down,
ready to start, one would have found it impossible to have found a fault
in her toilette. But the Earl chose to consider himself an authority on
feminine attire, and chanced to be in a particularly captious humour
that evening: the ground colour of Helen's dress--a dark Mazarine
blue--did not please him at all, though really nothing could match
better with her _parure_ of sapphires and diamonds. She listened to his
comments and strictures without contradicting them, apparently not
thinking the subject worth discussion: her silent indifference irritated
Clydesdale excessively. At last he said--
"Helen, I positively insist on your taking off that dress; there will be
time enough if you go up immediately. Do you hear me?"
For an instant she seemed to hesitate; then she rose, with an odd smile
on her proud lip--"Yes, there will be time enough," she said, and so
left the room.
But minutes succeed minutes, till it was evident that the conventional
"grace" must even now be exceeded, and still no re-appearance of Helen.
The Earl could control his feverish impatience no longer, and went up
himself, to hurry her. He opened the door hastily, and fairly started
back, in wrath and astonishment at the sight he saw.
The Countess was attired very much as Maud Brabazon found her when she
paid the midnight visit that you may remember. Perhaps her dressing-robe
was a shade more gorgeous, but there was no mistaking its character.
There she sat, buried in the depths of a luxurious _causeuse_, her
little feet crossed on the fender (it was early spring and the nights
were cold); all the massy coils of cunningly wrought plaits and tresses
freed from artistic thraldom, a half-cut _novelette_ in her
hand,--altogether, the prettiest picture of indolent comfort, but not
exactly the "form" of a great lady expected at a ducal banquet.
The furious blood flushed Clydesdale's face to dark crimson.
"What--what does this mean?" he stammered. His voice was not a pleasant
one at any time, and rage did not mellow its tone. The superb eyes
vouchsafed one careless side-glance, a gleam of scornful amusement
lighting up their languor.
"The next time you give your orders," she replied, "you had better be
more explicit: you commanded me to take off that blue dress, but you
said nothing about putting on another. Perhaps my second choice might
not have pleased you either. Besides, one is not called upon to dress
twice, even for a State dinner. You can easily make a good excuse for
me: if the Duke is very angry, I will make my peace with him myself. I'm
sure he will not bear malice long."
Now, putting predilection and prejudice aside, which do you think was
most in the wrong? The Earl was unreasonable and tyrannical, first; but
under the circumstances, I do think he "did well to be angry." He was
_so_ angry--that he was actually afraid to trust himself longer in the
room, and hurried downstairs, growling out some of his choicest
anathemas (not _directed_, it must be owned); as has been hinted before,
Clydesdale kept at least one Recording angel in full employment. The
spectacle of marital wrath did not seem greatly to appal the wilful
Countess. She heard the door of the outer chamber close violently,
without starting at the crash, and settled herself comfortably to her
book again, as if no interruption had occurred.
About this time the Earl began to be haunted by a certain dim suspicion:
at first it seemed too monstrously absurd to be entertained seriously
for a moment; but soon it grew into form and substance, and became
terribly distinct and life-like--the possibility of his wife's despising
him. When he had once admitted the probability, the mischief was done:
he brooded over the idea with a gloomy pertinacity, till a blind, dull
animosity took the place of love and trust. He swore to himself that, at
whatever cost, he would regain and keep the supremacy: unfortunately he
had never had it yet; and it would have been easier for him to twist a
bar of cold steel with his bare hands, than to mould the will of
Countess Helen. Every day he lost instead of gaining ground, only
embittering the spirit of resistance, and widening a breach which could
never be repaired. As if all this were not enough, before the year was
out, another and darker element of discord rose up in the Earl's moody
heart--though he scarcely confessed it even to himself--a fierce,
irrational jealousy of Alan Wyverne.
No one who had chanced to witness the parting of the cousins in the
library at Dene, would have allowed the possibility of free unreserved
intimacy, troubled, as it would seem, neither by repining nor misgiving,
being established between them within two years. Though Alan spoke
hopefully at the time, it may be doubted if he believed in his own
words. Yet such contradictions and anomalies happen so often, that we
ought to be tired of wondering. They moved in the same set, both in town
and country, and were necessarily thrown much together. Wyverne soon
managed to persuade himself that there was not the slightest reason why
he should purposely avoid his fascinating cousin. As for Helen, I fear
she did not discuss the question with her conscience at all. So,
gradually and insensibly they fell into the old pleasant confidential
ways--such as used to prevail before that fatal afternoon when Wyverne's
self-control failed him, and he "spake unadvisedly with his lips" under
the oak-boughs of the Holme Wood.
Perhaps there might have been a certain amount of self-delusion; but I
fancy that for a long time there was not a thought of harm on either
side. As far as Alan was concerned, I do believe that his affection for
Helen was as pure and honest and single-hearted as it is possible for a
sinful man to entertain.
Nevertheless, the change in the usual demeanour of the cousins, when
they chanced to be together, was too marked to escape observation. Her
best friends could not deny that marriage had altered Lady Clydesdale
very much for the worse: her manner in general society was decidedly
cold, and there was often weariness in her great eyes, when they were
not disdainful or defiant. The first sound of Alan's voice seemed to act
like a spell in bringing the Helen Vavasour of old days, with all the
charming impulses and petulance of her maidenhood. Ever since his
interview with Nina Lenox, Wyverne had been constantly moody and
pre-occupied; but the dark cloud was always lifted before he had been
five minutes in his cousin's presence; the frank, careless gaiety which
once made him such a fascinating companion returned quite naturally, and
he could join in the talk or enter into the project of the hour with as
much interest as ever. It _was_ remarkable, certainly--so much so that
the Earl might perhaps have been justified in not altogether approving
of the state of things, especially as he could not be expected to
appreciate Alan's feelings, simply because a chivalrous and unselfish
affection was something quite beyond his mental grasp.
Notwithstanding all this, I repeat that his jealousy was irrational. He
was sulky and uneasy in Wyverne's presence, and disliked seeing him with
Helen, not because he actually mistrusted either, but because he hated
the man from the bottom of his heart. He did not believe in the
possibility of his haughty wife's ever straying, even in thought or
word, from the path of duty; but she was the chief of his possessions,
and it exasperated him, that his enemy should derive profit or pleasure
from her society. In despite of an inordinate self-esteem, Clydesdale
could not shake off the disagreeable idea, that, wherever they had met,
so far Alan had got the better of him. He fancied he could detect a calm
contemptuous superiority in the latter's tone (it was purely imaginary),
which irritated him to the last degree. Added to all this--and it was
far the strongest motive of all--was the consciousness of having done
Alan a deadly wrong, in intention, if not in fact. It was true that he
knew nothing of Harding Knowles's treachery. He had carefully abstained
from asking a question, either before or after the result; but he knew
that he had bought an unscrupulous agent, on a tacit understanding that
a full equivalent should be given for the money; and he could guess how
thoroughly the contract had been carried out. In one word, the Earl
wished Wyverne dead, simply because he could not comfortably look him in
the face. Rely on it, that poison-bag lies at the root of many fangs
that bite most sharply.
Nevertheless, Lord Clydesdale abstained from confiding his antipathies
even to his wife. Deficient as he was in tact, he felt that a battle
would probably ensue, to which all other dissensions would have been
child's play. He had no solid grounds to go upon, and he did not see his
way clearly to a satisfactory result. So, in spite of his frowns and
sulkiness, matters went on smoothly enough up to the time of the
disclosures recorded in the last chapter.
It is probable that Lady Mildred discharged her embassage faithfully,
albeit discreetly. The subject was never mentioned between them; but
Helen's manner towards her cousin perceptibly softened, though she felt
a strange constraint occasionally that she could hardly have accounted
for. The truth was--if she had indulged in self-examination, at this
conjuncture she ought to have begun to mistrust herself. It was
dangerous to brood over Alan's wrongs now, when it was too late to make
him any substantial amends.
But the world would not long "let well alone." Before the season was far
advanced, _cancans_ were rife; and Lady Clydesdale's name was more than
lightly spoken of: glances, when levelled at her, became curious and
significant, instead of simply admiring. Of course, the parties most
intimately interested are the last to hear of such things; but Wyverne
did begin to suspect the truth, not so much from any hints or inuendoes,
as from a certain reticence and reserve among his intimates at the clubs
and elsewhere. One evening, Maud Brabazon took heart of grace, and told
him all she had heard, after her own frank fashion.
Not even during the hours which followed the miserable parting in the
library at Dene, had Alan felt so utterly hopeless and spirit-broken as
he did that night, as he sat alone, thinking over the situation, and
trying with every energy of his honest heart to determine what he ought
to do. Men have grown grey and wrinkled under briefer and lighter pain.
It did seem hard: when he was conscious of innocence of intention--when
he had so lately, at such costly self-sacrifice, abstained from
personally justifying himself in Helen's eyes, sooner than compromise
her husband--when he had just found out that he had been juggled out of
his life's hope through no fault or negligence of his own--he was called
upon to resign the shadow of happiness that was left him still, merely
because the world chose to be scandalous, and not to give him credit for
common honesty. But, after his thoughts had wandered for hours in
darkness and in doubt, the light broke clear. Half-measures were worse
than useless. To remain in England and to maintain a comparative
estrangement--to meet Helen only at appointed times and seasons--to set
a watch upon his lips whenever he chanced to be in her society--was
utterly impracticable. Like other and braver and wiser men, he owned
that he had no alternative--he was bound to fly. Weak and fallible as he
was in many respects, Wyverne's character contained this one element of
greatness--when he had once made up his mind, it was easier to move a
mountain than to change his resolve.
He never went near Clydesdale House for three days, and in that space
all his arrangements were made, irrevocably. Early in the year Alan had
purchased a magnificent schooner; she was fitting out at Ryde, and
nearly completed; he had purposed to make a summer cruise in the
Mediterranean, it was only turning the _Odalisque_ to a more practical
purpose, now. Two of his friends had organized a hunting expedition on a
large scale, first through the interior of Southern Africa, then to the
Himalayas and the best of the "big game" districts of India. Of course
they were delighted to have Wyverne as a comrade, especially when he
placed his yacht at their service; the _Odalisque_, both in size and
strength, was perfectly equal to any ocean voyage. Their absence from
England was to last at least three years. Alan felt a certain relief
when it was all settled; nevertheless his heart was cold and heavy as
lead, as he walked towards Clydesdale House to break the tidings. He
found Helen alone; indeed, the Earl was out of town for the whole day,
and was not to return till late in the evening. She could not understand
what had kept her cousin away for three days--of course she had wanted
him particularly for all sorts of things--and she was inclined to be
mildly reproachful on the subject. Wyverne listened for a while, though
every word brought a fresh throb of pain, simply because he had not
courage to begin to undeceive her.
At last he spoke, you may guess how gently and considerately, yet
keeping nothing back, and not disguising the reasons for his departure.
He had felt sure all along, that Helen would be bitterly grieved at his
determination, and would strive to oppose it; but he was not prepared
for the passionate outbreak which ensued.
The Countess's cheek had changed backwards and forwards, from rose-red
to pale, a dozen times while her cousin was speaking, and on the
beautiful brow there were signs, that a child might have read, of a
coming storm; but she did not interrupt him till he had quite said his
say; then she started to her feet; a sudden movement--swift and lithe,
and graceful as a Bayadere's spring--brought her close to Alan's chair;
she was kneeling at his side, with her slender hands locked round his
arm, gazing up in his face, before he could remonstrate by gesture or
word.
"You shall not go. I don't care what they say--friends or enemies--you
shall not go. Alan, I will do anything, and suffer anything, and go
anywhere; but I will not lose _you_. With all your courage, will you
fail me when I am ready to brave them? You cannot mean to be so cruel.
Ah, say--say you will stay with me."
Alas! if her speech was rash, her eyes were rasher still; never, in the
days when to love was no sin, had they spoken half so plainly.
Wyverne's breath came thick and fast, for his heart contracted
painfully, as if an iron hand had grasped it. It was all over with
self-delusion now; the flimsy web vanished before the fatal eloquence of
that glance, as a gauze veil shrivels before a strong straight jet of
flame.
Now--though this pen of mine has done scant justice to Helen's
marvellous fascinations--let any man, in the prime of life, endowed with
average passions and not exceptional principle, place himself in Alan's
position, and try to appreciate its peril. Truly, I think, it would be
hard measure, if human nature were called upon twice in a lifetime, to
surmount such a temptation, and survive it. Yet he only hesitated while
that choking sensation lasted. He raised Helen from where she knelt, and
replaced her on the seat she had left, with an exertion of strength,
subdued and gentle, but perfectly irresistible; when he spoke, his voice
sounded unnaturally stern and cold.
"If I had doubted at all about my absence being right and necessary, I
should not doubt now. Child--you are not fit to be trusted. How dare you
speak, at your age and in your station, of setting society at defiance,
and trampling on conventionalities? You have duties to perform, and a
great name to guard; have you forgotten all this, Countess Helen?"
On the last words, there was certainly an inflexion of sarcasm. The
bitter pain gnawing at his heart, made him for the moment selfish and
cruel. Perhaps it was as well; the hardness of his tone roused her
pride, so that she could answer with comparative calmness.
"God help me--I have forgotten nothing--my miserable marriage least of
all. Alan, what is the use of keeping up the deception? We need not lie
to each other, if we are to part so soon. I never pretended to love Lord
Clydesdale; but I think I could have done my duty, if he would have let
me.
"How can you guess what I have to endure? I may be in fault too; but it
has come to this--it is not indifference or dislike, now, but literally
loathing. Do you know how careful he is, not to wound my self-respect?
Only yesterday, he left in my dressing-room, where I could not help
seeing it, a letter--ah, such a letter--from some _lorette_ whom he
protects. It was a delicate way of showing that he was displeased with
me. And I have dreadful misgivings that I shall become afraid of
him--physically afraid, some day--I am not that yet--and then it will be
all over with me. I feel safe--I can't tell why--when you are near; and
you are going to leave me alone, quite alone."
Now, to prevent mistakes hereafter, let me say explicitly that I do not
defend Lady Clydesdale's conduct throughout. I don't know that any woman
is justified, on any provocation, in speaking of her husband in such a
strain, to her own brother, much less to her cousin, supposing that a
warmer sentiment than the ties of kindred is manifestly out of the
question. Still, if you like to be lenient, you might remember that a
passionate, wilful character like Helen's requires strong and wise
guidance while it is being formed; certainly her moral training had not
been looked after so carefully as her accomplishments; the mother
considered her duty done when she had selected a competent governess; so
perhaps, after all, the Countess had as much religion and principle, as
could be expected in Lady Mildred Vavasour's daughter.
It was a proof of the danger of such confidence, that Wyverne's blood
boiled furiously as he listened, and all his good resolves were
swallowed up for the moment in a savage desire to take Clydesdale by the
throat; but with a mighty effort he recovered self-control, before Helen
could follow up her advantage.
"I did guess something," he said, "though not half the truth. I ought to
preach to you about 'submission,' I suppose, and all the rest; but I
don't know how to do it, and I'm not in the humour to find excuses for
your husband just now. Yet I am more than ever certain that I can do no
good by staying here. I should only make your burden heavier; you will
be safer when I am gone. Of all things you must avoid giving a chance to
the scandalmongers. Child, only be patient and prudent, and we shall see
better days. Remember, I am not going to be absent for ever. Three years
or so will soon pass. We shall all be older and steadier when I come
back, and the world will have forgotten one of us long before that. Say
you will try."
Dissimulation is sometimes braver than sincerity. Perhaps Alan got large
credit in heaven for the brave effort by which he forced himself to
speak half hopefully, and to put on that sad shadow of a smile.
In a book of this length, one can only record the salient points of
conversations and situations; your imaginations must fill up the
intervals, reader of mine, if you think it worth the trouble to exercise
it. It is enough to say, that gentle steadfastness of purpose carried
the day, as it generally does, against passionate recklessness, and
Helen perforce became reasonable at last. Though the cousins talked long
and earnestly after this, the rest of the interview would hardly keep
your interest awake. Such farewells, if they are correctly set down,
savour drearily of vain repetitions, and are apt to be strangely
incoherent towards their close.
"If you are in any great trouble or difficulty, promise me that you will
send for Gracie; she will help you, I know, fearlessly and faithfully,
to the utmost of her power."
That was almost the very last of Wyverne's injunctions and warnings. If
at the moment of parting his lips met Helen's, instead of only touching
her forehead, as he intended, I hope it was not imputed to him as a
deadly sin; the sharp suffering of those few hours might well plead in
extenuation; and, be sure, He who "judges not after man's judgment,"
weighs _everything_ when he poises the scale.
I never felt inclined to make a "hero" of Alan till now. I begin to
think that he almost deserves the dignity. You must recollect that he
was not an ascetic, nor an eminent Christian, nor even a rigid moralist,
but a man essentially "of the world, worldly." If the Tempter had
selected as his instrument any other woman of equal or inferior
fascinations, I very much doubt if Wyverne's constancy and continence
would have emerged scatheless from the ordeal. But here, it was a
question of honour rather than of virtue. When his second intimacy with
Helen began to be a confirmed fact, he had signed a sort of special
compact with himself, and he found that it would be as foul treachery to
break it, as to make away with money left in his charge, or to forfeit
his plighted word. I do not say that this made his conduct more
admirable; I simply define his motives.
Alan went down to the North the next day to wind up his home business,
and he never saw Lady Clydesdale alone before he sailed. But he went
forth on his pilgrimage an unhappy, haunted man. Wherever he went those
eyes of Helen followed him, telling their fatal secret over and over
again, driving him wild with alternate reproaches and seductions. He
saw them while crouching among the sand-banks of an African stream
watching for the wallowing of the river-horse; at his post in the jungle
ravine, when rattling stones and crashing bushes gave notice of the
approach of tiger or elk or bear; oftenest of all, when, after a hard
day's hunting, he lay amongst his comrades sound asleep, looking up at
the brilliant southern stars. His one comfort was the thought, "Thank
God, I _could_ ask Gracie to take care of her."
Alan was expiating the miserable error of fancying that his love was
dead, because he had chosen formally to sign its death-warrant. The
experiment has been tried for cycles of ages--sometimes after a more
practical fashion--and it has failed oftener than it has succeeded.
Think on that old true story of Herod and his favourite wife. Lo! after
a hundred delays and reprieves the final edict has gone forth; the sharp
axe-edge has fallen on the slender neck of the Lily of Edom; surely the
tortured heart of the unhappy jealous tyrant shall find peace at last.
Is it so? Months and months have passed away; there is high revel in
Hebron, for a great victory has just been won; the blood-red wine of
Sidon flows lavishly, flushing the cheeks and lighting up the eyes of
the "men of war;" and the Great Tetrarch drinks deepest of all, the
cup-bearer can scarcely fill fast enough, though his hand never stints
nor stays. So far, all is well; the lights and the turmoil and the crowd
may keep even spectres aloof; but feasts, like other mortal things, must
end, and Herod staggers off to his chamber alone. Another hour or so,
and there rings through hall and corridor an awful cry, making the rude
Idumean guards start and shiver at their posts--fierce and savage in its
despair, but tremulous with unutterable agony, like the howl of some
terrible wild beast writhing in the death-pang--
"Mariamne! Mariamne!"
Does that sound like peace? The dead beauty asserts her empire once
again; she has her murderer at her mercy now, more pitiably enslaved
than ever.
Ah, woe is me! We may slay the body, if we have the power, but we may
never baffle the Ghost.